Monday, August 17, 2009

Eric Dane sex tape and the Cartoon Network

Some random musings...

The latest sex tape to hit the internet features Eric Dane from GREY'S ANATOMY, his wife, and another woman. Oh please let it be Katherine Heigl.
The Cartoon Network now has live-action shows. MTV and VHI have non-music related shows. American Movie Classics currently features hour series. What’s the point of branding? For all the talk of narrow-casting and a gazillion channels trying to find their niche, when push comes to shove, everyone wants a bigger audience and that usually means casting a wider net… Or, to use an outdated obsolete old school retro term – BROADcasting.

By signing Michael Vick the Philadelphia Eagles are now the most hated team in the NFL… even in Philadelphia.

Bob Dylan was stopped by cops in New Jersey and asked for ID. I can just imagine the exchange. Cop: “What’s you name, sir?” Bob: “Bababadabeedraleebadin.” Cop: “What?” Bob (getting annoyed): “Bababadabeedraleebadinyastunampidirasssher!” Cop: “Okay, buddy, let’s see some ID.

Britain released UFO documents detailing 800 alleged encounters. 780 of them from guys leaving pubs.

MAD MEN’S third season premiere did not disappoint. My head hurts with all the symbolism and Joan should no longer ever wear red but it’s fascinating to watch those characters and that world. The new British owners of the ad agency are really evil. That’s who the Martians should be targeting.

DANCING WITH THE STARS has announced its new line-up. One of the “stars” is a skateboard champ. Hey, YOU try to find sixteen actual celebrities in Hollywood! Also scheduled: Kelly Osbourne.

The next ten people who sign up to follow me on Twitter will become eligible to be contestants on the next edition of DANCING WITH THE STARS.

Michael Jackson will be buried on his birthday. Which year?

HuffPost Headline: Madonna Celebrates 51st Birthday In Poland Amid Catholic Protests. Too much loud Jewish music!!! How are we supposed to confess when there’s that goddamn Hava Nagila going all night long!!

Watching the Obama Town-Hall forum on Saturday I saw a number of elderly people angrily complain that the government should not get involved with health care. Uh, who do you think is running Medicare??

Paula Abdul says she might want to come back to AMERICAN IDOL. Like Hollywood Week, she should be made to go up the elevator, walk that long corridor to the massive judgment room, sit in a little chair in front of the producers, and plead and wail to the point where Tatiana del Toro is embarrassed for her.

At one time the Dodgers had the best record in baseball. Now they don't even have the best record in Southern California.

Madison Avenue had officially declared the summer TV schedule a failure. Not one new show sparked America’s imagination. I say wait, give HOUSE HUSBANDS OF HOLLYWOOD a chance. My review tomorrow.

I haven’t seen it but does THE TIME TRAVELER’S WIFE buy that her husband keeps disappearing to go back in time? This is a more plausible explanation than let's say, oh...he’s having an affair?

I’m sick to death of Jon & Kate. And three weeks ago I didn’t even know who they were.

But if it was Jon & Kate AND the other woman -- now THAT'S the kind of live-action show I'd watch on the Cartoon Network.

41 comments :

Unknown said...

Nice double call back at the end there.

Pamela Jaye said...

good point.

D. McEwan said...

Even worse, DANCING WITH THE HAS-BEENS (now includng Never-Weres) will also have that piece of right-wing garbage Tom Delay. DANCING WITH THE REPUBLICANS.

I'd rather listen to Mary Murphy screech than watch a show with that ratbag Tom Delay on it.

I just (two minuetes ago, while typing the above paragraphs) watched your buddette Patricia Heaton reveal her epic stupidity (the sort that makes her a raving ratbag opponent of stem-cell research) and absolute inability to do simple math on WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE. Regis had to help her answer the question, not usually allowed but she was playing for a charity which shouldn't be penalized just because the moronic Republican cow can't figure out how much money 30 quarters comed to.

But then, it's not news that she's an idiot. She proves it every time she publcially opens her mouth on politcal issues.

An Eric Dane sex tape? That sounds like entertainment.

Replic Jewelry said...

the whole tape thing is not gonna chose film, because there is updating that a steamier version is coming online soon. Someone may feel high, someone may feel exciting, while someone may be dying. Would Rebecca still feel she is “so high”? I don’t think so.

Unknown said...

Weren't the Eagles already the most hated football team in Philadephia?

D. McEwan said...

Best Heaton & Regis moment:

Regis: "WEll then, how much does 90 pennies come to?"

Heaton: "I can't do math."

How much math is involved in the calculation 90=90? You don't have to be Stephen Hawking to figure that one out.

And she was NOT joking!

D. McEwan said...

"replicajewelry said...
the whole tape thing is not gonna chose film, because there is updating that a steamier version is coming online soon. Someone may feel high, someone may feel exciting, while someone may be dying. Would Rebecca still feel she is “so high”? I don’t think so."

WHAT are you babbling about? I've rearead your posting four times trying deperately to figure out just what the hell you're talking about, but I am absolutely stumped.

Wayne said...

replicajewelry, are you by any chance replacing Paula Abdul on American Idol?

Alan Coil said...

DON'T USE THOSE LINKS !!!!!!

If you do, they ask for your email address. Use at your own risk.

Alan Coil said...

I may have seen a short bit of Mad Men tonight. Or maybe it was Cinemax.

In any case, some guy was kissing a bellhop. That's why I thought it might be a Cinemax late night program.
_______________

Joke from Letterman tonight: It's so hot in New York that Jon moved back in with Kate just for the cold shoulder.

J.J. said...

No matter what, the Eagles can't be the most hated team in the NFL, even with signing Vick. There's at least two other teams ahead of them on the "most hated" list: 1. Dallas (it's always the Cowboys, unless you're a chucklehead from West Texas that is), and 2. the other is, whatever team Terrell Owens is on (it's Buffalo this month, I think)...

A_Homer said...

Apparently Cartoon Network wants to rival the dumbest moves ever made by broadcast tv programmers. Instead of being satisfied with their great brand recognition and numbers - plus the potential of rewarding licensing fees of cartoon characters (who you don't pay salaries too or worry about sex tapes etc... nuisances) - the big idea is to lower costs.... They aren't going the AMC / HBO way, of original scripted programming, no, they are NOW going to reality programming, low-cost game formats and what is essentially the junk-bond of television markets. And this at the moment the FOX juggernaut is working fine, and cartoon Family Guy is going in for the Emmy kill. That's why there are so many jokes about Television CEOs I guess.

Matt said...

That Medicare line is about three weeks old, now, Ken. I would expect something better from a comedy writer.

WV: frankled-- what Minnesotans will be in a year.

blogward said...

And now we know why Dick Whitman is called 'Dick'.

By Ken Levine said...

Matt,

You wrote:

WV: frankled-- what Minnesotans will be in a year.

Gee, Matt, I read that a month ago from some other commenter. I would expect something better from you.

Anonymous said...

They seem love to play trio in a room. It is awesome if you watch them the online video at:

www.leakapic.com/2009/08/eric-dane-rebecca-gayheart-kari-ann.html

Vermonter17032 said...

Do you really think Eagles fans will hate Michael Vick? Have you seen Eagles fans? I suspect there are several dog fights being staged in the stands during Eagles home games because the football action on the field isn't violent enough for them.

Richard said...

So Eric Dane has a sex tape - so what, nothing wrong with that per se. Personally what bothers me more is the fact he and his wife are high as a kite. Yet Ken, you chose to bring Katherine Heigl into it. You have some real hate issues going on there. What you should have been doing is writing an article on why its more acceptable to slam someone for talking about working 17 hours than it is to have drug fuelled threesomes. Your double standards are incredible. Shame on you.

CrackerJacker said...

Madison Avenue had it right, summer '09 sucked for tv. The only show I liked was "In Plain Sight", and after it finished airing I read that it was being re-tooled, the runners were leaving, some of the cast were going to be appearing much less and they were intending to focus less on the relationship part of the show - the bit I liked! GAH!

Frasier Fan said...

I'm just so glad Don Draper is back on my TV that nothing else matters!

Karen from Mentor said...

" That’s who the Martians should be targeting."

Who says we I mean they aren't?

Todd said...

My favorite "now almost meaninglessly titled" cable channel is "The Travel Channel".

Two to three nights a week it's nothing but a traveling adjunct to "The Food Network", with solid primetime blocks of "No Reservations", "Bizarre Foods", "Man vs. Food", and a zillion shows about places to "pig out".

Then another night devoted to ghostbusting and haunted laundry rooms.

And another to theme parks, amusement parks, and water parks.

Really? They've run out of places to actually travel in the world?

Coming up:

A dead guy rides a roller coaster while eating a scorpion burrito.

Now that's travel.

Todd

Edward Copeland said...

Don't you think if there is ever was a Katherine Heigl sex tape it would only involve Heigl and a mirror?

Emily Blake said...

Ahh Cartoon Network.

A couple of my friends worked for Chowder. Chowder had great ratings and was a constant performer for the network, but because of this new reality thing they canceled Chowder to make way for some cheap ass show that follows kids around doing stuff.

For one of my friends, that was his first staff writing job and he'd only been on the show a couple of months, so now he can't get a job.

olucy said...

It's bad enough that the 20-something cops asked Bob Dylan for ID, but when he provided it, they still didn't know who he was. They had never heard of him.

amyp3 said...

I’m so old I remember when Discovery did science,
A & E had arts programs and the people at SyFy weren’t trying to spell in Beowulf-era English.

Even though I love good dancing (or perhaps because I do) I never watched DWTS until Kristi Yamaguchi was on it. And now dammit, they’re having another Olympian I like, Natalie Coughlin. But I hope Bob DeLay gets a groin pull.

Between the Palin-addled True Believers in “death panels” and wondering what happens to those of us who aren’t Bob Dylan when the cops offer to give us a lift -- I’m right back to sometimes wishing my ancestors had never left Canada, France or Sweden.

Eric said...

I do wonder - does Bob Dylan's license say "Bob Dylan" or "Robert Zimmerman?" Or maybe "Blind Boy Grunt" or "Robert Milkwood Thomas."

Matt said...

Ken,
Yeah, well I get to tell people that one of the writers of Frasier, Cheers, etc. responded personally to my comment. I kinda doubt that you'll go around telling people that I commented on one of your postings. I win. LOL and thanks.

Bill Peschel said...

Edward: Great line about KH.

And what the heck's the use of a blog if you can't flog your pet hates on a regular basis.

Great comment over at Fleshbot about the ED tape: "This is why p0rn should be left to the pros."

emily said...

What is it with these pea brains who feel the need to criticize this blog. They didn't pay big bucks to get in here...and if they think they can do it better, why don't they?

Ken spends lots of time and effort entertaining and informing -- all for free!

So all you critics, if you see something you don't like, do us all a favor and just STFU.

Over and out.

Steve said...

Matt said: Ken,
"Yeah, well I get to tell people that one of the writers of Frasier, Cheers, etc. responded personally to my comment. I kinda doubt that you'll go around telling people that I commented on one of your postings. I win. LOL and thanks."

Here's a flash, Matt. By now most of us think you're an idiot and we like and appreciate Ken (with the exception of the Heigl-worshippers who drop in from time to time), so you might want to re-evaluate the outcome of this little squabble.

Kirk said...

Um, Alan Coil, what links, exactly, aren't we supposed to use? And if someone asks for our email address, can't we just say refuse?

I agree that AMC is neither M or C these days. Its' competitor (at least until AMC gsve up the fight) TCM, is technically no longer T, but that's all right, as long as its' still CM.

Tallulah Morehead said...

"Richard said...
So Eric Dane has a sex tape - so what, nothing wrong with that per se. Personally what bothers me more is the fact he and his wife are high as a kite."

Well making a sex tape isn't something one generally does when sober. And didn't they share any with their - ah - guest? Who wants to be the only sober person in a drug-fueled threeway? Let me simplify that; who wants to be a sober person?

"Yet Ken, you chose to bring Katherine Heigl into it."

Yes, bringing her in would certainly ruin any good sex, not to mention harshing their high.

"why its more acceptable to slam someone for talking about working 17 hours than it is to have drug fuelled threesomes."

You have some real hate issues with drug-fueled threesomes, which I can tell you from long experience, are the best kind.

BTW, since when is spending 16 out of 17 hours sitting in your air-conditioned trailer bitching about the script and the food craft services while your stand-in works for you considered "working"?

"Edward Copeland said...
Don't you think if there is ever was a Katherine Heigl sex tape it would only involve Heigl and a mirror?"

VERY funny, but it would have to be a "drug-fueled mirror." Even mirrors have standards, you know.

"amyp3 said...
I’m so old I remember when Discovery did science"

Now I saw a science program on The Discovery Channel over the weekend, about getting the first-ever photos of living giant squids. And they weren't even drug-fueled squids having sex with Katherine Heigl. Even giant squids have standards.

"Matt said...
I kinda doubt that you'll go around telling people that I commented on one of your postings. I win."

CONGRATULATIONS! NO MORE CALLS! WE HAVE A WINNER! And let me tell you just exactly how impressed we all are. _____. Katherine Heigl will be by with your drug-filled trophy just as soon as Senator Franken finishes installing some Death Panels. The award, incidentally, is called "The Boob." According to show business legend, it was named for Marilyn Monore's left one.

"Kirk Jusko said...
TCM, is technically no longer T, but that's all right, as long as its' still CM."

My Ts are just fine, thank you. I assume you were referring to me, as I am Tallulah Clytemnestra Morehead, TCM.

WV: mingl: how Katherine Heigl spells her participation in a drug-fueled threeway.

Cap'n Bob said...

I agree with you Emily, for the most part (a little polite critical discourse isn't objectionable, and I think Ken would concur), but I need to correct one thing. The term "over and out" is an abomination. In radio transmission you say either over or out, but never both. I don't know how this error started but it's rampant since the days of Marconi and we need to stamp it out.

Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart tape here said...

The sex tape can be seen here:

http://www.SexTapeOn.Com

Barry said...

By the way, not to spoil the Time Traveller's Wife, but the adult guy appears to her several times as a young girl growing up, until she finally "catches up" to his age before he starts time-traveling.

You know, I read the book and that still makes no sense to me.

A_Homer said...

"VERY funny, but it would have to be a "drug-fueled mirror." Even mirrors have standards, you know."

Tallulah, you always deliver - great line.

Cavinow said...

Hey guys look what ive found:
Eric Dane sex tape HERE
=)

Tallulah Morehead said...

What a let-down! The Eric Dane "Sex tape" isn't a sex tape at all! It's a three drug-fueled nude-people-babble tape. No sex at all!

What did I expect from Gray's Exposed Anatomy? Even their porn is boring!

Tallulah Morehead said...

"Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart tape here said...
well it is nice to see her tits!"

Those weren't what I was interested in. I wanted to see McSteamy in action, and was willing to settle for it being with women, since his tastes are so breederish. But a sex tape of Eric with TR Knight would be a lot better for this viewer.

WV: rulat: Los Angeles in rut. How appropo.

los mejores videos said...

what bothers me more is the fact he and his wife are high as a kite.