tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post4928747432822909556..comments2023-11-03T06:02:02.128-07:00Comments on By Ken Levine: Really rotton 'ritin'By Ken Levinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17305293821975250420noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-7788082900234495812008-01-25T08:37:00.000-08:002008-01-25T08:37:00.000-08:00I'm glad I'm not the only person who finds these a...I'm glad I'm not the only person who finds these absolutely genius.brenderlinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05388288485882380824noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-55190969529523813272008-01-25T06:23:00.000-08:002008-01-25T06:23:00.000-08:00Number 7 comes from the Washington Post's annual s...Number 7 comes from the Washington Post's annual simile contest. I first saw it about 6 years ago.Karenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01288100796201737845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-26603991656885375652008-01-23T19:33:00.000-08:002008-01-23T19:33:00.000-08:00Yup... as hilarious as a hot model who struts down...Yup... as hilarious as a hot model who struts down the runway at a New York fashion show then drops like a sack of hammers off the end... of .... the... <BR/><BR/>nevermind.Elbow P. Murderpantshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17891829940727646195noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-62084193806669634092008-01-23T08:47:00.000-08:002008-01-23T08:47:00.000-08:00Well, I had come here to point out the Hitchhiker'...Well, I had come here to point out the Hitchhiker's ref, but I see people have it well in hand.<BR/><BR/>I too, approve of these smilies, like Inspector 12 approves of quality underwear.DM Magichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15748059462191505548noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-51610450558227347592008-01-22T20:57:00.000-08:002008-01-22T20:57:00.000-08:00Ken, as a warning, if you get an e-mail offering y...Ken, as a warning, if you get an e-mail offering you $15,000,000 if you can just assist in getting the money out of a war torn country, it MAY be a scam. <BR/><BR/>The trick is finding an honest Nigerian to arrange the deal.<BR/><BR/>I love these, myself. Much funnier than anything on According to Jim.Robhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08923161793979910495noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-10875953446364831062008-01-22T19:57:00.000-08:002008-01-22T19:57:00.000-08:00Get well, Ken, like a man who swallowed a stomach ...Get well, Ken, like a man who swallowed a stomach virus, heaved his guts out, and then started to gradually feel better.Richard Cooperhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04094016831874148306noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-46393528891219436542008-01-22T19:31:00.000-08:002008-01-22T19:31:00.000-08:00Like I said, I can't vouch for their authenticity ...Like I said, I can't vouch for their authenticity but how funny they were trumped that. And besides, I have the flu. Happy to have something to post that doesn't require my brain.By Ken Levinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17305293821975250420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-41079454456294661022008-01-22T19:05:00.000-08:002008-01-22T19:05:00.000-08:00I agree, they're funny, but I saw them at least te...I agree, they're funny, but I saw them at least ten years ago, maybe more like 20. The Nancy Kerrigan reference dates it if nothing else. I rather like the image of a body hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag full of soup.Cap'n Bobhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11783977137812876489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-63499759200196761092008-01-22T18:40:00.000-08:002008-01-22T18:40:00.000-08:00These are indeed hilarious -- but they're actually...These are indeed hilarious -- but they're actually entries from the Washington Post Style Invitational, an ongoing contest in that newspaper. Here's the original URL:<BR/>http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/03/16/AR2007031600738_pf.htmleuphoria0504https://www.blogger.com/profile/03395162178212636466noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-72968715350904236192008-01-22T16:42:00.000-08:002008-01-22T16:42:00.000-08:00shots rang out, as shots are known to doshots rang out, as shots are known to doAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-11453315007979923382008-01-22T16:23:00.000-08:002008-01-22T16:23:00.000-08:00"everyone got the Douglas Adams one... good to see..."everyone got the Douglas Adams one... good to see he was also big in the US, cause i always thought that US audiences mightnt like his 'thing'..."<BR/><BR/>Smacklab darling (Classy nom de plume), rest assured that Dougie Adams was immensely popular in the US. (Although he hated that, in the US, total strangers would call him "Doug," instead of "Mr. Adams," or at least, "Douglas.") His novels sold quite well over here (His non-fiction, not so much). I attended four or five of his California book store signing events, and he always drew a huge crowd, at the last one I went to, his line stretched out the door, down the block and around the corner. The DVDs of the HITCHHIKER TV series sells well here. The movie of Hitchhiker didn't do all that well though. He felt welcome enough to move here. Even his DOCTOR WHO work is beloved here.<BR/><BR/>And let's not forget that we killed him, that is to say, he dropped dead (At the obscenely young age of 49) walking down the street in Santa Barbara, California.Tallulah Moreheadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07416330735326405496noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-34896354823163877792008-01-22T11:34:00.000-08:002008-01-22T11:34:00.000-08:00I laughed like a guy who was laughing like he'd ju...I laughed like a guy who was laughing like he'd just read something funny.Dago Thttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08575763379679718046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-69999726079058707092008-01-22T10:47:00.000-08:002008-01-22T10:47:00.000-08:00I usually never post things I've receeived from th...I usually never post things I've receeived from the internet but this one was just too too funny.By Ken Levinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17305293821975250420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-12795849717045876172008-01-22T10:16:00.000-08:002008-01-22T10:16:00.000-08:00M*A*S*H SimilesIMAGINE:all the first part of the s...M*A*S*H Similes<BR/><BR/>IMAGINE:<BR/>all the first part of the similes being read by Colonel Henry Blake,<BR/>the middle part being read by Trapper <BR/>and the end read by Hawkeye...<BR/><BR/>example:<BR/>HENRY: That General Steele still has a great mind.<BR/>TRAPPER: ...Like a steel trap<BR/>HAWK: Only one that has been left out so long it's been rusted shut.<BR/><BR/>OR<BR/><BR/>HENRY: How 'bout that? That girl will really grow on you...<BR/>TRAPPER: Like a colony of E.Coli<BR/>HAWK: And we're room-temperature Canadian BeefThe Bumble Bee Pendanthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11782074071758250824noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-12310105319059942772008-01-22T09:35:00.000-08:002008-01-22T09:35:00.000-08:00You're posting e-mail forwards now?You're posting e-mail forwards now?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-50372428151422277042008-01-22T08:53:00.000-08:002008-01-22T08:53:00.000-08:00That was as funny as, like, whatever.That was as funny as, like, whatever.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-49564440794548945912008-01-22T08:43:00.000-08:002008-01-22T08:43:00.000-08:00Actually, #17 isn't all that bad -- if the context...Actually, #17 isn't all that bad -<I>- if</I> the context was meant to be sort of a detective story parody. If not, then it doesn't work.<BR/><BR/>And that poor mallard a few entries later (land mine?).VP81955https://www.blogger.com/profile/11792390726196611188noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-85847473232804511152008-01-22T08:40:00.000-08:002008-01-22T08:40:00.000-08:00I seriously doubt that any of these are from high-...I seriously doubt that any of these are from high-school essays; virtually all of them sound as if they either come from works of fiction, or were invented out of whole cloth. That's not to say they aren't good.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-28598604713368642182008-01-22T07:32:00.001-08:002008-01-22T07:32:00.001-08:00I wish my students wrote this way. Hell number 3 s...I wish my students wrote this way. Hell number 3 sounds exactly like something I would write.Emily Blakehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02163221455899041141noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-21455006403089605342008-01-22T07:32:00.000-08:002008-01-22T07:32:00.000-08:00I think most of those are hilarious. I'd like to ...I think most of those are hilarious. I'd like to read the entire stories to see if the authors kept that tone throughout. Surely the writers meant to be funny.Mary Stellahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02186261066656584772noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-68151968348122275582008-01-22T06:46:00.000-08:002008-01-22T06:46:00.000-08:00I love these kinds of things, but I've never seen ...I love these kinds of things, but I've never seen this particular list before.<BR/><BR/>A fun set of books for this are the Bulwer-Lytton books ("Son of It Was a Dark and Stormy NIght", etc).Craig Perkohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13173752470581218239noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-47090800570978316822008-01-22T06:42:00.000-08:002008-01-22T06:42:00.000-08:00Personally, is there any better visual than a Heft...Personally, is there any better visual than a Hefty bag full of vegetable soup?webbiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13832941345633728737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-84057427322118330062008-01-22T05:26:00.000-08:002008-01-22T05:26:00.000-08:00These are hilarious, but I saw this same list some...These are hilarious, but I saw this same list some half-dozen years ago in an English class.Benjy Stonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15386372954237840840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-25642479290790627042008-01-22T04:11:00.000-08:002008-01-22T04:11:00.000-08:00No. 1 truly has style, tempo and brevity. You can ...No. 1 truly has style, tempo and brevity. You can envision that writer becoming the next hot creative genius on Madison Ave.Mike McCannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06369457898152250682noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-17283444281490402812008-01-22T03:04:00.000-08:002008-01-22T03:04:00.000-08:00No. 6 and 7 are my faves... No. 6 reminds me a bit...No. 6 and 7 are my faves... No. 6 reminds me a bit of that Bill Bailey line "people ask me if Im and optimist and i say 'i hope so!'" <BR/><BR/>god! everyone got the Douglas Adams one... good to see he was also big in the US, cause i always thought that US audiences mightnt like his 'thing'...<BR/><BR/>PS everyone should check out Bill Bailey... he's brilliant!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com