tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post7987158319195511415..comments2023-11-03T06:02:02.128-07:00Comments on By Ken Levine: More tips on writing dialogueBy Ken Levinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17305293821975250420noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-50789013160362344022016-08-03T08:36:43.370-07:002016-08-03T08:36:43.370-07:00True story: the most shocking curse I ever heard o...True story: the most shocking curse I ever heard on TV or Film was on M*A*S*H*, at least in terms of viewer impact. I don't recall the exact episode, but Hawkeye was full of moral outrage at a a soldier (iirc, he was having Hawkeye nurse someone back to health so he could then be taken to be executed).<br /><br />Ah, found it. It was episode 172, "Guerrilla my Dreams". Mako plays a South Koren soldier taking a North Korean woman into custody, almost certainly to torture her for intelligence. When their 'wacky hijinks' fails, Hawkeye calls Park (Mako) a SON OF A BITCH in righteous fury. This was 1979 on TV. I'd heard the curse, obviously, but Hawkeye saying it? It was like a slap in the face. I might have gasped, even. And then, of course, the moral ambiguity of that episode was kind of amazing. Mako was the villain, but he wasn't necessarily wrong.WizarDruhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00251397305365764287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-57040630782182844922016-08-03T06:12:04.147-07:002016-08-03T06:12:04.147-07:00Great tips! I'm finding that improv covers a l...Great tips! I'm finding that improv covers a lot of the same things. Working in front of an audience (even just the class) quickly gets you thinking about the right things: Who are these people, and what's interesting about them. Johnny Walkerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13302545167970532080noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-30323907178135808992016-08-03T05:07:26.549-07:002016-08-03T05:07:26.549-07:00Friday Question: When have you broken any of these...Friday Question: When have you broken any of these rules, and what was the reason or rationale?Stuart Bestnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-51569390669786584232016-08-02T19:59:03.100-07:002016-08-02T19:59:03.100-07:00One of the worst examples of characters calling ea...One of the worst examples of characters calling each-other by name was "Rhoda." The two sisters said their names constantly, in almost every sentence. And often they said it TWICE: "But Brenda, Brenda..." "Wait Rhoda, Rhoda..." Once I started noticing this it almost ruined the whole series for me. Garynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-66474421768671158132016-08-02T19:33:15.714-07:002016-08-02T19:33:15.714-07:00Too many novelists also have people calling other ...Too many novelists also have people calling other characters by their names WAY too often. I keep waiting for a character to reply "I know what my name is for, Christ's sake! That's the seventh time in this conversation you've used it." I have paid attention to how often people use each other's names in real life conversations, and the answer is hardly ever. Tomnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-59044723739253012422016-08-02T18:17:30.905-07:002016-08-02T18:17:30.905-07:00@John Nixon:
Beyond bad wording, radio commercials...@John Nixon:<br />Beyond bad wording, radio commercials also suffer from way *too much* wording. Advertisers can't seem to comprehend that six sentences spoken at a normal pace have a lot more impact than ten sentences read at Mach 8 to squeeze it all into :30.<br /><br />Everyone with a stake in the commercial has their own sacred cow that they think is the most important thing to say in an ad, and nobody has the authority (or courage) to make cuts. If you've ever had the experience of being on a committee trying to write a mission statement, you probably know what it's like when everyone has their own idea of what mission is most important. What's supposed to be a boiled-down, easy to follow concept quickly becomes a Frankenstein's Monster of buzzwords.Andy Rosenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-10966385401272405832016-08-02T17:56:41.441-07:002016-08-02T17:56:41.441-07:00"Mansplaining" seems a neat way to cloak..."Mansplaining" seems a neat way to cloak exposition as comedy:<br />-- "Now you've been here for ten years, Agnes."<br />-- "Really?"<br />-- "Yes, really. And I don't have to tell you how important the Watson account is to the firm."<br />-- "No, you don't. In fact I briefed you on it ..."<br />-- "Watson accounts for ten percent of our total revenues ..." (Agnes is mouthing the words along with him whenever he looks away)DBensonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01144515471557731622noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-74525637835150763722016-08-02T16:18:00.679-07:002016-08-02T16:18:00.679-07:00I forgot to mention: The Trump "dialogue"...I forgot to mention: The Trump "dialogue" I posted above is something he really said today, verbatim.Igornoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-7269523072926386252016-08-02T14:54:55.986-07:002016-08-02T14:54:55.986-07:00If I were writing a Trump biopic, it'd be a ch...If I were writing a Trump biopic, it'd be a challenge to cut down his dialogue yet depict his tendency to be repetitious.<br /><br /><i>TRUMP<br />I’ve never been there with John McCain because I’ve always felt that he should have done a much better job for the vets. He has not done a good job for the vets and I’ve always felt that he should have done a much better job for the vets. So I’ve always had a difficult time with John for that reason, because our vets are not being treated properly. They’re not being treated fairly.</i>Igornoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-42381202773297828792016-08-02T13:40:21.945-07:002016-08-02T13:40:21.945-07:00Glenn said...
Mike Nichols said scenes "can&#... Glenn said...<br />Mike Nichols said scenes "can't just be people talking to each other", but Tarantino has gotten tons of mileage out of exactly that.<br /><br />So did Chandler.Earl Boeberthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07300222007927549893noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-24374267131277712592016-08-02T12:37:51.482-07:002016-08-02T12:37:51.482-07:00Todd EVerett: I suspect one reason writer don'...Todd EVerett: I suspect one reason writer don't do that is to save lengthy discussions about what sum of money the number should be. I remember reading that THE GOOD WIFE writers took a lot of argument to decide on $8,000 for the hotel room Alicia and Will grabbed at the end of season 2. Besides the fact that money numbers probably date a show quicker than almost anything else except old computers.<br /><br />wgWendy M. Grossmanhttp://www.pelicancrossing.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-37571852927806751412016-08-02T10:31:40.991-07:002016-08-02T10:31:40.991-07:00In the radio business advertisers constantly insis...In the radio business advertisers constantly insist on writing their own copy and have us read stuff like "don festive apparel and feast on fabulous cuisine and delicious libations while engaging in lively banter..." Then when nobody shows up at their business they conclude that radio doesn't work. If you try to help them by writing more engaging, conversational copy the sales people get upset because they think we're getting in the way of putting the money on the books and the advertiser often gets offended feeling that we have ruined their fine masterpiece. And that's one of the reasons why so many radio, and probably television, commercials sound so bad.John Nixonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15534701157125020415noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-67263618015665410982016-08-02T10:15:22.080-07:002016-08-02T10:15:22.080-07:00For exposition, don’t have characters tell other c...<i>For exposition, don’t have characters tell other characters things they already know. “You’ve been working at this precinct for 16 years.” This happens a lot in procedurals. “When the blood coagulates like this and is exposed to air it turns a shade of purple.” “I’ve been in forensics for twenty years, I know that!” </i><br /><br />My favorite has always been "as your attorney [or accountant, dentist, art history professor, etc.], I must advise you..." <br /><br />I'd also like to give aspiring screenwriters a list of thing for parents to call their children in place of the ubiquitous "sweetie."<br /><br />And for that matter: when someone offers a large amount of money, let him or her name it, rather than writing it on a piece of paper.Todd Everetthttp://toddeverett.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-85651281260760784772016-08-02T09:05:14.803-07:002016-08-02T09:05:14.803-07:00Mike Nichols said scenes "can't just be p...Mike Nichols said scenes "can't just be people talking to each other", but Tarantino has gotten tons of mileage out of exactly that. Glennnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-8719364750035368282016-08-02T08:36:17.396-07:002016-08-02T08:36:17.396-07:00i think there are limits to how "real" d...i think there are limits to how "real" dialogue can be. in actual conversations, people wander off topic. they often don't hear things and say, "excuse me?" and words are repeated. people sneeze and other people say bless you. they yawn. they take long pauses, they say "um" a lot. in a script, no one sneezes or yawns unless it's a plot point. repeated sentences are wasted page space. the trick, i guess, is to make it real enough to fool everyone. dan ohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10850650021260128271noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-19999887294120657462016-08-02T07:32:31.074-07:002016-08-02T07:32:31.074-07:00I would take that point about writing the opposite...I would take that point about writing the opposite sex, and extend it to writing different races, gender identities, and sexual orientations. Basically anyone who has a substantially different life experience than you.Mitchell Hundredhttp://twitter.com/sackobooksnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-58478512782361439452016-08-02T07:04:16.017-07:002016-08-02T07:04:16.017-07:00I get all of this (not that I'm a writer...), ...I get all of this (not that I'm a writer...), but wouldn't you agree that some of it isn't necessarily just part of the writer's job, but also up to the actors how they interpret their character within the shape that the script provides? I would think that in writing a scene, the writer draws the outline of a character, then hands a bunch of crayons to the actor to fill in the colors, and at best keeps some oversight so that they don't make the pants neon green and the skin dark purple or some such...Markusnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19336675.post-90844823338137202472016-08-02T07:03:27.825-07:002016-08-02T07:03:27.825-07:00Really great advice!Really great advice!Blakehttp://www.apopheniaworks.comnoreply@blogger.com