... Doug McEwan
... whose entry in the KOMEDY KONTEST received the most votes.
DANNY HAD SUCH A FEAR OF COMMITMENT THAT HE...
B...told his mother he "Wanted to see other moms."
Also kongrats to the other four finalists -- Steve Zeoli, cfang19, spike,and z5CBuE8Z3PMf0Cc6FPnMApMnke0. All the entries got a lot of votes. Even E.
A signed AfterMASH script is on its way to you Doug. Perfect for starting that AfterMASH shrine in your home.
Tomorrow I will post all the semi-finalist entries (along with a bonus). Thanks to everybody for participating. This has been a real fun experiment.
Whose entry was...?
ReplyDeleteB.
ReplyDeleteGah! I went the mom route too but had the good taste to bring afterbirth into it! I was robbed.
ReplyDeleteWell, yours was more concise and, yeah, pretty damn funny so well done Doug (hey, aren't you Tallulah Morehead's biographer?). A well deserved win.
Oh dear. As much as I would love to have made the cut, none of my six brilliant entries actually did. So I'm not sure how I ended up as a finalist!
ReplyDeleteI scrolled through the original posts to see if perhaps one of the five finalists was above or below one of my entries, but nope. So I guess there's been a mistake -- besides the obvious one of my genius yet again going unrecognized. :)
After a little more searching, I think "spike" is the missing finalist.
ReplyDeleteThanks jbryant.
ReplyDeleteKen
Thank you Ken.
ReplyDeleteThank you all who voted for my joke. I'd thank my agent if she hadn't been deported to Canada two years ago. I'd like to thank my late parents, who always thought there was something a little funny about me, particularly Mom, whose complex relationship with me inspired teh joke in the first place, Andy Goldberg for giving Ken the idea, Richard Hooker for writing the novel M*A*S*H, without which there never would have been an AfterMASH, the anonymous judge who selected my joke as a finalist (Just what was wrong with my 30 other entries? Oh, never mind.) along with the four other, less-popular finalists, the author of E for offending so many potential voters, Ken again, for allowing anonymous voting, and Tallulah Morehead, just for being her.
Now, what are the dates I need to clear on my calendar for The Punchline Tour?
Seriously, thanks to one and all. It really was an honor just to be nominated. I'd say that I'm sharing this award with all the finalists, but we'd all know that was a line of crap, wouldn't we?
Douglas
JUSTICE DOESN'T EXIST IN THIS WORLD!
ReplyDeleteAll jokes aside, congratulations. :P
Congratulations, Douglas. Yours was my favorite, too -- well phrased, nice take on the concept. And thanks to Ken. This was a ton of fun, even though participating cost me several hours of sleep.
ReplyDeleteRecount. I don't think the minorities were properly represented, such as the minority of "jokes" that were actually good.
ReplyDeleteI suppose though, the best out of a pretty bland bunch won... it's not really something to congratulate, so think of this as a somewhat honourable mention for your effort Doug.
I think I need to see other blogs.
ReplyDeleteCheers from NZ Doug and well deserved.
ReplyDeleteWell done, Douglas. I'd like to bid for the film rights.
ReplyDeleteKen,
ReplyDeleteTwo questions:
(1) Did the idea of having Ryan Seacrest announce the winner during "Dr. Demento" night on AI fall through?
(2) Can I get the name and the phone number of the blonde holding the sign (unless it's your daughter)?
Oh, and a big Congratulations to Doug!
Congratulations, Doug...another honor about which Tallulah can be absolutely underwhelmed.
ReplyDeleteI guess the polite thing to do would be to congratulate Doug for a good entry and a solid win, which it most certainly was, but instead I'll sit bitter feeling that the entry I came up with the morning after submissions closed would most certainly have won. It had everything: a turn on a popular phrase, internal rhythm and rhyme, and a curse word to punctuate the sauce.
ReplyDeleteOh well, I feel better knowing I came up with the Almost Perfect of this competition.
Dear Tom Quigley: I think the better line would be "Can I get the name and the phone number of the blonde holding the sign (unless it's your son)?"
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't meant to be a joke....
ReplyDeletesephim said:
ReplyDeleteI suppose though, the best out of a pretty bland bunch won... it's not really something to congratulate, so think of this as a somewhat honourable mention for your effort Doug.
Geezus, talk about turning sour grapes into whine.
Congratulations, Doug.
Thank you to Ken for holding the Kontest (Can we do it again sometime, please?); To the judge for going through all of the entries; To everyone who entered. This was great fun.
Douglas, very funny, and congratulations!!! Please send me a photocopy of the autographed page when you get it 'cause Ken's signature will come in very handy when I'm writing checks at the Sky Bar this summer.
ReplyDeleteCongrats, Doug! I'd leave you some bitter, grumbly words here, but all the good ones have already been taken. To the sore, sour losers - please refer to the finger in the photo below ('Rats Jump Sinking Ship...')
ReplyDeleteI'd like a photocopied page of Kenneth's signature as well.
ReplyDeleteCongrats, Doug, on a well-deserved win! I must be breaking my losing streak ... typically, anyone I vote for loses whatever it is that they're trying to win, but I voted for both you AND Hillary within the same week! Congrats to the other finalists as well - it was quite a contest!!
ReplyDeleteMany thanks to Ken and "da judge" for the terrific diversion. Looking forward to reading the entries that were runners-up.
And, GEESH, poor losers are ANNOYING; I have an 11 year-old son with more maturity and manners!
weak. the words "mom" and "mother" on the punchline? it'll never work.
ReplyDeleteI was dissapointed by the KKK. Who was the mistery judge anyway?
Anon said, "I was dissapointed by the KKK. Who was the mistery judge anyway?" (sic)
ReplyDeleteHaving been a reader on this blog for a long time, I'm confident that Ken picked someone he knew would be quite capable of determining what's funny to a mass audience and what's not .. and s/he most likely knows how to spell "disappointed" and "mystery", to boot.
Enjoy the script, Douglas! I hope that the boo-birds aren't ruining your moment in the sun (such as it is!).
"the words "mom" and "mother" on the punchline? it'll never work."
ReplyDeleteFor something that "'ll never work," it sure worked. But then, I supose all the people who voted for it, an overwhelming majority if you go back and actually count the votes, were all wrong, and anonymous is right, except for that pesky fact that it did in fact work, in the sense that it accomplished exactly what I wrote it to accomplish.
My thanks to all the congratulaters.
congrats doug!
ReplyDeletei voted for you.
will you please vote for barack obama.
no pressure. i'm just sayin'....
congrats again!
hahaha, did you come back here just to reply to the only guy who said it wasn't good? sad.
ReplyDelete"JSWN said...
ReplyDeletecongrats doug!
i voted for you.
will you please vote for barack obama."
Already done. I voted for that fine Black Irish O'Bama in the California primary, and look forward to doing the same in thegeneral election, come November.
And "Anonymous," My pointing out the literal error of your snark isn't half as sad as your hiding behind anonymity. If you're a man and you have something to say to me, use your name, coward.