Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Scenes from Comic Con

Comic-Con, the destination for everyone who ever got beaten up in high school. Or Day Care. One of my spies took these pictures this weekend. Thought you might enjoy this glimpse into the Apocalypse.
"Yes, I feel I'm very qualified to run for the senate. I was an intern for Barbara Boxer, I vaporized North Korea, and unlike my opponent, I can relate to the common man."
Fuel Pump Man is back and is pissed!
This is how the Jewish Orthodox will dress in the future.
Imagine coming to the convention dressed in this sad costume?
This is what happens when sports team mascots go bad.
"Up against the wall, maternal anthropoid biped fornicator!"
"Oh, Superman, thank God you're here! For the life of me I don't know how get Final Draft to open."
Lady Gaga's parents stopped by to say hello.
"What do you mean, what part did I play in LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS?"
Trash Can Man and the Jaundiced Lantern meet to compare notes.
Behold the greatest pizza delivery man in the galaxy!
As always future scribes, you're welcome to suggest your own captions.

16 comments :

  1. Chevy says: "In National Lampoon's Comic-Con Vacation, Beverly and I . . ."

    For the Superman photo: "Can you tell me when Eric and Bill from True Blood will be signing?"

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  2. For the interview pic:
    "But, the real excitement of course is going to come at the end of the summer, during Sexual Awareness week."

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  3. For all (incl. Chevy):

    No, I never get laid.

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  4. Ken, you are absolutely the funniest maternal anthropoid biped fornicator!

    I've always wanted to say that.

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  5. Trash Can Man and the Jaundiced Lantern - formerly Bill and Ted - meet to compare excellent adventures.
    _____
    Looks like they're about one Phillie shy of Phandemonium.

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  6. Damn Don LaFontaine for dying...

    Looking at all the pictures...

    "In a world... filled with nerds..."

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  7. Maybe they were people who used to get laid but prefer not to anymore. I would just like to explore all angles before cementing my position.

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  8. The Letterman online Top 10 list this week is "Top 10 pickup lines heard at Comic-Con"... Some of my submissions:

    "Hey, nice buns there, Leia!"

    "Is that a Batarang in your pants, or are you just glad to see me?"

    "Are you a virgin? Because I'm really hoping to go where no man's gone before"

    "You know, with my fangs and your neck, I think we make the perfect couple"

    "How'd you like to find out how TERMiNATORS 6: ATTACK OF THE JACKRABBIT VIBRATORS ends?"

    "Tell me you're not really Megan Fox -- or else my X-ray eyes do deceive me!"

    "With your gorgeous pallid looks, you should be in slasher movies"

    "Why don't we go back to my web and swap a little arachno-spit?"

    "You really do belong here -- you look just like Sarah Palin!"

    "Hi, I'm Darth Vader... Just do as I say and no one will get hurt"

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  9. wohooo this place is awesome, i lovve to go in there it looks like so fun..

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  10. You caption for the Chevy Chase picture made me roar. "Hey Chevy, it's 'Comic-Con', not Ex-Comic-Con!"

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  11. Jimmy Kimmel had my favorite line on Comic Con, on the story about the two nerds getting into a fight and one of them being taken to the hospital with a small cut above his eye from a pen. Kimmel said, "80,000 people standing around in superhero costumes, and nobody rushed in to help."

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  12. A. Buck Short7/28/2010 6:37 AM

    Right. The one guy most likely to fall down and hurt himself, and he’s wearing no protective gear --excuse me, “garb” –- whatsoever. Tom, thanks for reminding of the Late Show top ten contests; it’s been a while since I only had 237.5 diversions on a work day. Don’t they limit you to only one submission at a time or per week? I think you should get a shirt just for coming up with 9 credible aliases. Have you ever known anybody whose boffo submission has actually been selected? My theory is the writers’ assistant goes through the list until he finds 10 workable submissions, then quits. I mean, who keeps looking for his car keys after he finds them?

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  13. Anybody else notice that Chevy Chase is morphing into Dick Cheney?

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  14. A. Buck Short:

    They limit you to one suggestion per entry, not one entry per list. You can submit as many separate entries as you want -- and I did have one make the list about two months ago... Sadly, they've shortened their archive to just the preceding month's lists, so it's no longer available to be pulled up...

    I figure anyone who's going to have a chance at getting one on the list had better have a bunch of suggestions and get them in as early as possible, which I imagine is also what is expected of the writing staff who come up with the nightly on-air lists.

    It's a good exercise in seeing how creative and funny you can get about a certain topic.

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  15. Just realized -- I meant to write TRANSFORMERS 6 in my post above where I wrote TERMINATORS 6...

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  16. Not a Letterman Intern7/28/2010 6:50 PM

    I was a winner on the Letterman contest in August '01. The topic: Top 10 clauses in the Tom Cruise/Nicole Kidman divorce agreement.

    I was #2: Neither one is allowed to date George Clooney.


    Tragically, that's pretty much the highlight of my writing career to date (unless you count blog comments such as this).


    And, for the record, I've never worked as a Letterman intern. (And two years ago who'd have ever thought that could be a set-up)

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