Warning: I'm feeling snarky today

So here are some random topics...

Now that the MODERN FAMILY adults have gotten a pay raise, the kids want to negotiate pay hikes as well.  I'm not making this up.  Did they not see how hard it was to replace Lilly? Have they not noticed that on MAD MEN every year there’s a different Bobby Draper? Ray & Debra Barone had kids too. How often did you see them? If Haley is shipped off to college she’s back to doing Olive Garden commercials. At what point does this become silly?

At one time you tuned into the Olympics and there was Jim McKay. Now it’s Ryan Seacrest. That’s like saying once we had Brando, now we have Rob Schneider.

I don’t care what anybody says. I love THE NEWSROOM. This week’s was terrific. If we're not going to see Olivia Munn naked at least we get to hear her speak Japanese.  And Sam Waterston finally blew a gasket. For ten years I was waiting for him to do that on LAW & ORDER. Just once I wanted to see him grab Tovah Feldshuh by the neck and swing her around the courtroom like a rag doll.

In 1995 Jeff Greenstein & Jeff Strauss had a sitcom on Fox called PARTNERS. Here’s the premise: two architects are partners. One of them gets engaged, which strains their relationship. They also have an off-beat secretary and the pilot was directed by James Burrows. Now CBS has a sitcom premiering in the fall from David Kohan & Max Mutchnick (WILL & GRACE) called PARTNERS. Here’s the premise: two architects are partners. One of them gets engaged, which strains their relationship. They also have an off-beat secretary and the pilot was directed by James Burrows. If you look real hard you might see similarities. When Jeff Greenstein cried foul Kohan & Mutchnick were baffled and claimed they’re two very different shows. I’m interested to see how this plays out because I have a pilot I’m developing about a straight girl living with a gay guy and they each have a kooky friend. What do you think of WILL & GRACE as the title?

THIS JUST IN:  My book is now available in Audiobook form!  I narrate it myself.  Here's where you go to order.   Imagine me sitting next to you on a 7 hour & 23 minute car ride to Bakersfield.  I'm very excited about it and hope you will be too.  Even if you bought the book, it's different listening to it.  I correct all the typos.  

Actual Huffington Post headline yesterday: MAN SHOOTS FIREWORKS OUT OF HIS BUTTOCKS, GOES TO AUSTRALIA HOSPITAL.

At the CBS session with TV critics, new daytime talk show host, Jeff “Wanna know what you’re playin’ for?” Probst said this: “If you’re looking for Jerry (Springer) or Maury (Povich), this isn’t your show. We aren’t looking for people fighting onstage or paternity testing. If you’re looking for something new, that’s where we are.” He goes on to say his role model is Phil Donahue. Phil’s daytime yak show ran from 1967-1996. What could be newer than that?

I will say this: as much as I love THE NEWSROOM, I can’t imagine watching it in closed-captions.

More book news:  I'm planning some book signings for THE ME GENERATION… BY ME (GROWING UP IN THE ‘60s). You peeps in LA and Seattle – any interest in coming out for something like that? I’ll read, I’ll sign, I’ll explain the Infield Fly Rule. For updates, reviews (got a bunch of really nice ones), photos, and insane videos just visit my website – megenerationbook.com. And please buy the book! There’s no guarantee the public will watch a show called WILL & GRACE.

At 38 Ichiro lowers the average age of the Yankee line-up.

Based on how AMERICAN HORROR STORY finagled its way into Emmy nominations, NBC should enter their Olympic coverage as a mini-series next year.

Why I prefer the Summer Olympics to the Winter Olympics:

Ever have dreams of being a sportscaster? The Houston Astros are looking for a young radio reporter who would be a regular part of the broadcast, interviewing players, and filing reports. The contest is open to everybody willing to live in Houston. Here’s where you go to sign up.

Have you heard the great news? Bristol Palin is going back on DANCING WITH THE STARS! The last time she was on, a man in Wisconsin was so angry he shot his television set. I fear for his microwave. Not only is Bristol a Clydesdale on the dance floor, this time she’ll be competing against four former winners. As if ABC cares. By the way, Bristol’s qualification for being considered a star (besides being the daughter of attention monger Sarah): she’s a paid speaker for teen abstinence. I can’t tell you how many young girls from Ohio get off the bus every day in Hollywood with stars in their eyes and dreams of becoming the next paid speaker for teen abstinence.

The acquisition of Hanley Ramirez will really help the Dodgers… until he turns into Manny Ramirez.

And they wonder why STEP UP REVOLUTION was such a boxoffice flop this weekend. They left in a scene where the dancers break into a party wearing body vests and gas masks and use gas grenades to threaten the guests. Now you might say, how could they be so fucking stupid in light of Aurora? Hey, they did pull the scene from the TV ad.

For all the people in Great Britain who thought it was just fine that the Olympics Lid Lifter was geared just for them and who cares if the rest of the world is left out? --  The Brentwood Cheesecake Factory on San Vicente is closing in September.