Our first agent wasn’t very good. When David Isaacs and I were starting
out, writing spec scripts, living on Kraft macaroni, and trying to
break in we managed to get an agent. She was a legitimate WGA signatory
but she wasn’t top tier. She wasn’t third tier. But shows would
accept her submissions, which was all we really needed.
She sent our spec MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW to the late great David Lloyd, who
was one of their producers. When she didn’t hear back in a few weeks
she sent him a blistering following up.
Several days later he responded. It was a rejection letter. The opening sentence was:
HOW DARE YOU!
He then went on for three paragraphs to rip her a new asshole for
questioning his integrity and accusing him of shirking his
responsibilities.
Almost as an afterthought, he finally got to our script in the fourth
paragraph and basically said it was a complete amateurish piece of shit
(although I don’t think he put it that nicely).
Years later we worked together on CHEERS and I mentioned the letter.
David being David, he said, “Well, I’m sure it was a piece of shit.”
I’m also sure he was right.
You won’t be surprised to learn that once we got our first assignment
(that this agent had nothing to do with), we moved on to more reputable
representation.
In my career, I’ve been on the other side numerous times. I’ve been the
one reading and judging. I always write nice rejection letters, even
if the script sucks eggs. I feel that good, bad, or indifferent, the
person (or team) went to the effort of writing a script and the least I
could do is let them down easy.
Plus, who’s to say I’m always right? I’m not. Along the way, I’ve
rejected a few great people who went on to long and successful careers.
When a writer friend of mine was story editor on ARCHIE BUNKER’S PLACE
he rejected a script by the Coen Brothers. It happens to all of us.
So when you get rejected – and we all do – take heart. You never know who’s going to turn out to be an A-lister.
My favorite story of that was from Larry Gelbart. Larry was one of the
most gifted and successful writers of the last half-century. Among his
credits: creating the TV version of MASH, TOOTSIE, OH GOD!, FUNNY THING
HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM, SLY FOX, CITY OF ANGELS, CAESAR’S
HOUR – it goes on and on. But when he was 18 he had a screen test for
an acting part in a George Cukor movie at MGM. He did his test, he
wasn’t chosen, and that was that. Many years later when he was an
accomplished writer he happened to bump into Cukor at a party. He told
him the story and Cukor said to him, “Well why didn’t you tell me who
you were?”
Good luck and may you become who you hope to be.
A nice pick-me-up. Thanks, Ken!
ReplyDeleteAs I send queries to producers hoping one, just one, will bite my bait, this is definitely reassuring.
ReplyDeleteWonderful story. Pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and do the best you can with the sh-t you got.
ReplyDeleteOh, Mr. Gelbart. What an amazing person.
"I always write nice rejection letters, even if the script sucks eggs. I feel that good, bad, or indifferent, the person (or team) went to the effort of writing a script and the least I could do is let them down easy."
ReplyDeleteI think that's very cool of you. Imo, it's simply the right thing to do. Hopefully though, you DO provide some helpful criticisms, not just platitudes. I know that when I seek feedback, I'm not looking to get ripped, but I am trying to determine where someone thinks I went wrong and how I can improve.
What, you didn't keep a copy of your MTM show spec?? If you had, it would be "educational" at the very least.
ReplyDeleteUnlikely, but how surprising and pleasing would it be to see (years later) that it was mostly good?