Monday, November 27, 2017

My comprehensive review of JUSTICE LEAGUE

You've seen it.



27 comments :

  1. As someone who enjoys these films, this one is dreadful.

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  4. Pictures 1 and 4 might make it watchable.

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  5. Let's not turn this into a political discussion on terrorism, people. If so I'm deleting the comments.

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  6. Enough with the super heros already! Dead Pool was my last of the genre. Good one to end on.

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  7. My post minus the political stuff:

    Ezra Miller was very funny as Barry Allen/The Flash.

    Gal Gadot was hot. As usual. Let's just have WONDER WOMEN sequels from now on and forget the others.

    It was fun to see a cameo by Marc McClure, who was Jimmy Olsen in the Christopher Reeve movies.

    It was only 2 hours, unlike most bloated comic book movies.

    On the negative side:

    JK Simmons, a fantastic actor, was wasted in a pointless role that amounted to nothing.

    Endless CGI and green screen made much of the action look like one long video game.

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    Replies
    1. Peter, you make a good point about the CGI. I've often said that these superhero movies have so much CGI that they should just drop the pretense of calling them "live action." They should just make them 100% CGI. Today, a lot of the video games look as good if not better than some movies.

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  8. Ken, you need to have a spoiler alert blurb.
    Your review might ruin it for someone.

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  9. It's like looking at someone's vacation pictures: you had to be there.

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  10. I know you're not a big fan of the DC super-hero films. I personally loved the first two that Zack Snyder did (Man of Steel and Batman v Superman). That said, Justice League was terrible. It was missing all of the nuance that the first two films had which I liked. And the shift in style and tone from scene to scene (depending on which of the two directors directed it) was very jarring to me.

    I know your review is tongue in cheek, but the irony is that two of the five scenes you included screen caps for were not in the final film (which, since the two-hour run time was mandated by WB management, is a big part of the problem that I had with the film since it wasn't allowed to breathe like the others).

    Anyway, I know I've already over-analyzed something that was intended to be a joke in the first place.

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  11. Where were the Wonder Twins?

    "Form of... water!"

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  12. Wait, Hollywood made the same movie twice? What fresh Hell is this?

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  13. Pete Grossman11/27/2017 10:32 AM

    Your comprehensive review indeed expresses the depth of this picture. Perfect!

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  14. Sorry, guys and gals, but I can’t get past the costumes. They’re comical. Batman looks like he’s been dipped in foam rubber. Steppenwolf couldn’t make through a door with that hat rack on this head. Who does he think he is, Bullwinkle? And the Flash’s costume looks like the seamstress couldn’t decide whether to make him the Scarlet Speedster or Black Rivet Man. That can’t be aerodynamic. I’ve never liked the updated Superman (looks plastic like an action figure) or Wonder Woman (looks like it came back from the laundry with tell tale grey) outfits but compared to the other three characters mentioned, they look like they’re wearing formal wear.

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  15. "It was missing all of the nuance that the first two films ..."

    I didn't realize negative nuance was a thing.

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  16. I want to read Ken's opinion on an American marrying into the British royal family. That surely provides ample comedic fuel.

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  17. Superhero films in general have been a vote against viewer intelligence for at least twenty years; for one to get a negative reaction from even that audience must make it pretty terrible.

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  18. A good writer never uses more words than necessary.

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  19. Yes, I'm with @Peter on the Royal Engagement. I was going to post a few jokes myself. And then I discovered something called hipster racism, which is a very real problem if you're Ricky Gervais. So I'd like to see Ken do it properly, using the unique insight that he has gained from many decades as a practicing American.

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  20. You forgot to post the text.

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  21. Ah, royalty...it's easier than thinking. Something for the shopgirls and receptionists to swoon over now that the "sexiest man alive" has been chosen.

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  22. I liked most of WONDER WOMAN, but I'm going to give this one a pass. Seeing the trailer was enough for me.

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  23. I didn't hate it. I wanted to, but I couldn't.

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  24. Best. Review. EVER. bahahaha Just fantastic Ken!

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  25. I’ve yet to see anything that indicates that DC have the faintest idea of what makes Superman enjoyable. They still seem to want to shamelessly ape what Nolan achieves with Batman... a VERY different character.

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  26. I saw it in 3D. It was the best 3D movie I have seen so far. Very realistic rendering.

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