It's about Andrew Lloyd Webber. And here's the part I loved:
Alan Parker’s 1996 version of “Evita,” he concludes, was the best of
the lot and that’s due to Madonna’s performance. “To this day, I don’t
think anybody else could have done it better,” he says.
And then there’s “Cats,” which hit theaters in 2019 and was a cinematic
bomb that launched a thousand memes, one that was excoriated by critics
and ignored by the public. Lloyd Webber says the source material was
sold to Amblin, which after trying to turn it into a Steven
Spielberg-directed animated feature, eventually handed the reins to Tom
Hooper, who had helmed “Les Misérables” and “The King’s Speech.” That
proved to be a disastrous decision, according to the composer.
“‘Cats’ was off-the-scale all wrong,” says Lloyd Webber. “There wasn’t really any understanding of why the music ticked at all. I saw it and I just thought, ‘Oh, God, no.’ It was the first time in my 70-odd years on this planet that I went out and bought a dog. So the one good thing to come out of it is my little Havanese puppy.”
That puppy has been a constant companion of Lloyd Webber’s during lockdown. They have grown so attached that he’s even figured out a way to bring the dog to New York the next time he travels to the city.
“I wrote off and said I needed him with me at all times because I’m emotionally damaged and I must have this therapy dog,” says Lloyd Webber. “The airline wrote back and said, ‘Can you prove that you really need him?’ And I said ‘Yes, just see what Hollywood did to my musical “Cats.”’ Then the approval came back with a note saying, ‘No doctor’s report required.’”
That explains why I saw you get off a plane with Lassie whilst wearing an Aftermash T-Shirt.
ReplyDeleteMadonna is better than Patti LuPone?
ReplyDeleteWhen I first read that "Cats" was directed by Tom Hooper, I mistakenly thought you said Tobe Hooper, the director of "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre," "Eaten Alive" and "The Mangler." That would've made more sense.
ReplyDeleteThe airline may be all right with the dog but Lload Rubbish needs to check with British authorities. The laws about bringing animals in are very strict and may keep the dog in quarantine for six months.
ReplyDeleteIf Lloyd Webber thinks Madonna is better than Patti LuPone, that explains a lot.
ReplyDeleteMy wife and I saw Cats at our performing arts center--the touring company. The performers were good. The show really didn't do much for me. Then I remembered that no Lloyd Webber musical actually does much for me, and I felt better.
I remember the Norm MacDonald (RIP) joke on SNL's "Weekend Update". "'Cats' broke the Broadway record for its (number)-straight performance. And for the (number)-straight time, a husband asked his wife, 'What the hell was that?'"
ReplyDeleteBTW, I never knew "Memory" was from that musical. The first version I heard was Barbra Streisand's, and my young self just assumed that was an original number from her.
Lupone is amazing, but she was also 10 years too old for Evita by the time the movie got made.
ReplyDeleteTo my taste, the best Evita was Julie Covington on the original 2-LP version of Evita. A few of her tracks from it seem to be available online, but not my favorite, "Star Quality." Hear her in the role and perhaps you'll agree.
ReplyDeleteYears ago, when a friend said to my wife and myself, "You've got to see Cats!", we got ourselves tickets. At intermission, we looked at each other and in unison, said, "You want to get out of here?" We had no idea the show was all song and failed to understand anything that was being sung. I wonder if we're the only ones to ever walk out of Cats.
ReplyDeleteI saw the film--and in the "unfinished" version--and thought it was generally fine (except for Rebel Wilson, who could have ruined "Citizen Kane"). I think that those of us who saw it on stage knew what we were getting into and immediately accepted the premise at face value, while those coming to it cold (which was clearly the majority) were like the husband in Norm's joke. Some things are just better left to the stage, I guess, as the failures of IN THE HEIGHTS and DEAR EVAN HANSEN have also proven.
ReplyDeleteI always loved Jesus Christ Superstar, seen it a few times in community theatre, and because of the music, always was good.
ReplyDeleteCats, meh
"Cats" is about dancing. if you go for the songs or the drama you have made a mistake, but the original choreography well performed will remind you what the human body can do and be beautiful.
ReplyDeletebut everything else is just an unconnected bunch of poems about cats by a poet I keep looking for a good English translation of.
Amen, Anthony. Amazing talent meant to be seen on the big screen. Anyone who can't appreciate that doesn't have a heart or a soul. As I've said before, the movie created an engaging story that the stage version lacked. I think it's shameful that Lloyd Webber trashed it given the exquisitely talented performers involved. It's "The Phantom of the Opera" that leaves me cold. It has no discernible middle. Otherwise, I'm a huge fan of "Jesus Christ Superstar" and "Evita."
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post. Thank you!
ReplyDelete@ Lorimartian
ReplyDeleteWHAT are you smoking?
I have just witnessed one of the worst sitcom episodes in TV history. Wednesday's "The Conners." It was inept, unfunny, and a total piece of garbage. Seriously.
ReplyDeleteAnd then I followed it up, with one of the worst episodes of "SVU." THEN, yet another "La Brea" idiocy? THIS is the death of "network TV." BUT, "La Brea" was the most-watched new series? WHAT?
ReplyDeleteThe new NCIS Hawaii is maybe the worst show I've ever seen. Unbelievably bad writing, aimless scenes with fake banter, charisma-free actors, and every frame is ugly. In Hawaii! I recently got hooked on some cop shows and love NCIS Los Angeles, Blue Bloods, and Hawaii Five-0. How could they muck it up so bad?
ReplyDeleteAm I the only one who's noticed that LA BREA is just a slick reworking of LAND OF THE LOST?
ReplyDelete