Saturday, February 26, 2011

Charlie Sheen shopping tell-all book


According to TMZ (so it must be right), Charlie Sheen is shopping a behind-the-scenes look at TWO AND A HALF MEN and opening the bidding at ten mil.  What are we gonna learn, that Chuck Lorre didn't laugh enough at runthroughs or that Holland Taylor chews with her mouth open?   I know... I'm just jealous because his book will sell a helluva lot more than my upcoming travel book (exciting news on that soon...see how I seamlessly worked that in there?), but Charlie, to paraphrase your explanation for why you pay hookers...

I pay you to leave. 

25 comments :

  1. Agreed - when I see him complain about how badly he, the highest paid actor on TV gets treated, I cannot help but think that he of all folks should believe that when you pay someone a lot, you don't have to treat them nicely...

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  2. I bid 10 kabtrillion and two hookers for Charlie's book.

    Do I win? If not, how is 10 million a more realistic bid?

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  3. Can't CBS pay a professional to shoot him in his sleep? He'll feel no pain and we can get Lindsay Lohan back on the front page.

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  4. I think Charlie Sheen's version of behind the scenes at Two and a Half Men should be interesting...but I think it's probably more fiction than not.

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  5. On a positive note, I read a "5 Things You DOn't KNow About Chuck Lorre" article on The Hollywood Reporter, and this was #5:

    The one show he wishes was his?
    “Cheers," he told THR last year. "I just love the simplicity of it. They never left that bar. I mean, literally. Hundreds of episodes of television were right there.”

    http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/5-things-you-dont-know-161954

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  6. The one show he wishes was his?
    “Cheers," he told THR last year. "I just love the simplicity of it. They never left that bar. I mean, literally. Hundreds of episodes of television were right there.”


    Ah yes, just what Cheers was missing: More dick jokes.

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  7. They did leave the bar, but not often.

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  8. While I'm sure a book "By Charlie Sheen" (i.e., by whoever he hires to write it for him) would sell well, but to make back a $10 million dollar advance, it would have to sell like the last HARRY POTTER book. I really don't believe there are that many readers that interested. (But imagine a long line of people, all dressed up as "Charlie Sheen", waiting in line at midnight to buy Charlie's book the instant it comes out.)

    I wonder how much of that $10 million he plans to pay whoever actually writes it. My guess is he'd be lucky to get $10,000 out of Sheen.

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  9. I don't understand all the hate being directed at Sheen. He's got some problems (i'd guess bipolar disorder) and a serious sense of entitlement, sure. But the nastiness seems like resentment to me: plenty of folks in hollywood have gotten rich & famous with worse behavior, less talent, and a more dubious work ethic.

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  10. Al Goldstein2/27/2011 6:52 AM

    To quote Rick James via Chpelle's Show: "Cocaine is a helluva drug."

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  11. Just another moment from the slowly-unfolding slow-motion train wreck that is "le affaire d'Sheen,' or whatever the French will call it decades from now when they declare Charlie Sheen a comedic genius to rival Jerry Lewis.

    I just saw a promo for a sit-down interview Sheen did for ABC, and it had to have been recorded right on the heels of the "tell all" book announcement. Depending upon how cuckoo-pants Sheen appears in the interview when it airs, I think we'll be able to gauge whether he's going to pull out of this nose-dive or do a full-on Anna Nicole.

    In the meantime, the L.A. Times is running a piece by Patrick Goldstein with the title, "Mel Gibson to Charlie Sheen: Thanks, pal, for making me look almost sane."

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  12. I'll watch that Sheen interview! Because deep down I love craziness like this, and I think the week's Nielsens will confirm that many other Americans share my love of the Circus of the Stars.

    I mean, seriously, aside from fiscal crises here and rebellions abroad, nothing much else is going on.

    Keep your eyes on the prize, ABC News! (God, if only they could get Lindsey Lohan to interview him. I'm sure she'd ask tougher questions.)

    wv: arthrato -- neurological calcification disorder that leads people to remake movies and cast Russell Brand.

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  13. Based on his rant on the Alex Jones Show, what's Charlie going to call the book -- "Protocols of the Elders of Zion"?

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  14. I just saw a promo for a sit-down interview Sheen did for ABC, and it had to have been recorded right on the heels of the "tell all" book announcement.

    "20/20", Tuesday night. Get out your popcorn and your drug of choice! ;)

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  15. "Anonymous said...
    I don't understand all the hate being directed at Sheen. He's got some problems (i'd guess bipolar disorder) and a serious sense of entitlement, sure. But the nastiness seems like resentment to me: plenty of folks in hollywood have gotten rich & famous with worse behavior, less talent, and a more dubious work ethic."


    That's a three year old's defense: Other people were worse." If a man mugs you, and when you wanted him arrested he pointed out: "Hey, other people are murderers," would you then go: "Okay then. Thanks for mugging me. Have a nice day"?

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  16. Forget it, Douglas, it's Hollywood.

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  17. Charlie Sheen is an entertainment writer's "dream come true"

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  18. Charlie Sheen is an entertainment writer's "dream come true"

    My first thought when this whole thing became a mushroom cloud was, "The writers at "The Soup" probably saw this and exclaimed, "Holy shit! We just got permission to eat for another two years!"

    WV: cirian - If Ciaran Hinds was a Crayola crayon, that would be his color.

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  19. I propose this: Let Martin Sheen step in for Charlie. If Joan Crawford could step in for Christina on The Secret Storm ....

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  20. Will Ben Affleck and Joachim Phoenix appear with Charlie Sheen on the Today show tomorrow morning?

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  21. I propose this: Let Martin Sheen step in for Charlie. If Joan Crawford could step in for Christina on The Secret Storm ....

    Not possible. He played Charlie's mother's (Holland Taylor) crazy, mother-attached boyfriend and I don't think they'd want to resurrect that again.

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  22. Per Rory L Aronsky:
    " Not possible. He played Charlie's mother's (Holland Taylor) crazy, mother-attached boyfriend and I don't think they'd want to resurrect that again."

    Drat .. Having never watched an episode of TAAHM, I didn't realize they had already exhausted this possibility for an Escape Clause.
    Well then --Hasta La Vista ....

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  23. I propose this: Let Martin Sheen step in for Charlie.

    I propose:
    Sarah Chalke: she takes the role of Charlie w/o any explanation... when Sheen comes back everyone can ask "where the hell have you been?"

    If Chalke is busy w/ How I Met Your Father or whatever it's called they could use Alicia Goranson...

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  24. If Chalke is busy w/ How I Met Your Father or whatever it's called they could use Alicia Goranson...

    We've gone from sitcoms with Carroll O'Connor and Bea Arthur as leads, to Jason Biggs as the lead. I'm sure she'll be available soon.

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  25. clare slavik5/15/2011 6:07 PM

    Charlie Sheen is of the most talented actors if u can follow Michael J Fox & still make a hit u gotta b awesome oh ya & all u Charlie haters member the movie Platoon if u didnt like that movie than u must b a f----- commie oh by the way who was the star academy award Charlie Sheen

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