Monday, October 29, 2012

My book signing is tonight!!!

Tonight’s the night of my book signing at the Barnes & Noble at the Grove in West Los Angeles. It’ll be from 7-9, I’ll be reading a section of my book, THE ME GENERATION… BY ME (GROWING UP IN THE ‘60s), answering questions, and signing my name a lot. If you’re in LA, please come by. Say you heard about it in my blog and receive as a free bonus my thanks.

But if you can’t make it (let's say you live in Bhutan), you can still feel a part of it by ordering my book. Here’s where you go. Kindle, paperback, and audiobook versions are available. They make great trick-or-treat items for the kiddies Wednesday night.

As an extra incentive, here’s a brief excerpt. Hopefully, you’ll read it and say, “Jesus, if these are the kinds of things that happen to this nimrod, where do I get my copy?”

The following story is absolutely true. Even though this incident took place way back in 1969 I can still remember it in vivid detail.  What a great memory I must have. 

KMPC’s Gary Owens arranged for me to watch them make Laugh In at the NBC studios in Burbank. They were filming blackout sketches that day – quick sight gags. So there was no audience. Just the cast and crew and me in a big drafty soundstage filled with flimsy sets and props. Very workmanlike and informal. No one even noticed I was there.

On the agenda that day was a series of blackouts featuring 23 year-old Goldie Hawn as a cute little French maid negotiating a mop and bucket. A self-contained kitchen set with two walls was wheeled onto the sound stage.

For one of the gags, Goldie was to plunge her mop in the bucket and water would shoot up into her face. The only problem (besides the gag not being remotely funny) was that the set was on a solid base. There was no way to attach the hose to the bottom of the bucket. So someone had the bright idea that they could just get a thin clear color hose and run it up Goldie’s leg and if shot at just the right angle it would appear the geyser of water was sprouting from the bucket.

Ten minutes later, a hose was produced and handed to Goldie. I’m standing right in front of her. She’s on this two-foot high base. She runs this tube up her leg and lifts her little mini skirt to slip it through her panties. But when the drippy hose meets her panties they instantly become invisible.

So there I am – callow, 19-year-old, a mere inches away, standing eye-to-eye with Goldie Hawn’s perfectly visible vagina.

Later in the year we would land a man on the moon, perhaps mankind’s greatest achievement. I was more in awe of this. 

15 comments :

  1. I thought it was canceled due to Sandy.

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  2. Pete Grossman10/29/2012 9:57 AM

    Gives new meaning to "The show must go on." Nice :-)

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  3. My jealousy is profound. I wanted her then, and I wasn't even pubescent.

    Cheers,

    Alan Tomlinson

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  4. Friday question:

    What do you think of the decision to switch the format of "Up All Night" from single-camera to multi-camera with live audience in the middle of it's second season? How difficult will it be for the writers to make the transition?

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  5. Kurt Russell Terrier10/29/2012 12:08 PM

    there's a golden memory!

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  6. Please describe in excruciating detail. Thank you, you lucky dog.

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  7. If I'd seen that at 19 I'd still be there - staring into the space where it was revealed to me, and unable to form a coherent thought.

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  8. Benjamin's Privates10/29/2012 1:33 PM

    So, was it a perfect match for the blonde hair, or is she more of a Dirtwater Fox?

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  9. I could only have wished I was you at that very moment. I had SUCH a crush on her then!

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  10. So I finished your Audiobook. I was very entertained, nice writing and a nice story to tell.
    As a curious little note, you actually talk faster than.. just about every other narrator I've heard, meaning a potential 10 hour audiobook is cut right down! I'm not getting at any point here, it suited me fine, I just thought it was a curious little tidbit you might be interested in.
    Thanks for the read!

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  11. Drat, still can't come. Hopefully there'll be an encore.

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  12. If Kurt Russell is web surfing . . .

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  13. Friday Question:
    Ken you've talked int he past about holding the late Sam Denoff in high regard and that you did meet him in the past. What about Bill Persky?

    I just finished listening to an extended interview from March 2012 with Bill (who sounds strong and vibrant for 80) where Bill talks about writing with Sam, The Dick Van Dyke Show, That Girl, and Kate and Allie.

    His story of an actor on the pilot of Kate and Allie who thanked the producers profusely for casting him because his appearance as Allie's first date after her divorce allowed him to get his SAG card - is funny when you learn the name of that actor.

    So have you ever met Bill (one of my heroes as well)? And do you think it was harder to write a longer sitcom back in the 60's that had one plot line versus the later format sitcom with several stories in one episode?

    The link in my name takes you to the page where you can play or download the Bill Persky interview. Bill's interview starts at the 1 hour 6 minute mark.

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  14. No chance for a fickle finger of fate for that sweet bippy, huh? I guess you socked it to you when you got home.

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  15. So, was it a perfect match for the blonde hair, or is she more of a Dirtwater Fox?

    Which reminds me of a story concerning Goldie's comedic godmother of sorts, Carole Lombard. She was making a film with George Raft (they made two, "Bolero" and "Rumba"), and George pays a visit to Carole's dressing room (they also had an affair, and Lombard reportedly told close friends that in terms of pure technique, Raft was the best lover she ever had). Anyway, he finds Carole dyeing her pubic hair; he was a bit aghast, but Lombard told him, "Relax, Georgie -- I'm just making my collar and cuffs match."

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