Friday Questions

Friday Questions with several MASH-themed ones this week. But not the first one.

Frank Beans has a question about attending TV tapings.

"Some shows have an age requirement..."

Could you elaborate on that a bit more? Is it too young, too old, or some other random criteria, and on what kinds of shows typically? Do you think this is a practical, ethical, or wise practice?

For adult oriented shows the age limit is 16. Time is money and the show doesn’t want to hold up filming for screaming babies and unruly children. And since we’ve all seen this behavior tolerated by parents in movie theatres and fine restaurants, and considering tickets to TV filmings are free, they have every right to set restrictions. Take kids to Chuck E. Cheese, not CHEERS.

However, if the show is a Disney Channel show or one that is geared to kids and pre-teens, the age restriction is either eased or eliminated.

Chris Thomson wonders:

At the end of MASH are big part of the story is dealing with him and BJ probably never seeing each other again, after their time together.

And BJs difficulty with saying good-bye.

I just wondered after a long running series like MASH, Cheers, and Frasier, especially given in interviews everyone seems to get on with each other, how much people do still meet up when in town etc, cast and crew etc.

I think it’s a lot like college. How many of your close college friends do you still see on a regular basis? People move, they drift out of the business, they establish new families with new long-running series, etc.

I’m still friends with all the writers on MASH, CHEERS, and many on FRASIER. We email, get together for lunch occasionally, help out on each other’s pilots, etc.

From time to time I also meet up with actors from these shows and especially the shows I co-created. And they’ll pop up from time to time either as podcast guests (like Jamie Farr recently) or guest bloggers.

But it’s difficult to maintain as close a relationship with someone when you no longer see them every day.

From Wayne Carter:

My agent submitted a spec script of mine to MASH in 1979-80. Though well received, we were offered only $500 for the story instead of a chance for me to sell the script ($10,000?) and get a chance for revisions or credit. We were basically told the writers' staff was locked and no outside script assignments at this point of the show were available (except supposedly one by a producer's girlfriend). Do you remember such a situation at that time? It's always bugged me, but I can understand staff writers locking the gates once hefty syndication residuals come into play. It was just frustrating. We didn't accept the deal.

First of all, this was after my time. We never bought a spec script during my tenure. So it’s hard to speak with any authority. I’ll tell you what I think happened just reading between the lines.

They liked your story but not the writing. And they didn’t like the story enough that it was worth it to them to pay for a full script and then do a page-one rewrite. That’s just my guess.

My policy was never to buy a spec unless it was so good and the story was so good that I could keep most of it. And I never found one of those.

However, if I really liked the writing I would bring the writer in and give him another story and script assignment. So the spec didn’t sell but it got his foot in the door, which realistically is a home run with spec scripts.

And finally, from Edward:

In the scheme of things, wasn't CBS' decision to have Radar leave at the beginning of Season 8 a smart move? Ending the season with a cast member leaving might take the wind out of a show during the hiatus.

It was a smart move but not for that reason. The key benefit for CBS was that it had an event show to promote for November Sweeps. Lots of shows lost characters at the end of a season. It’s less of a big deal than one exiting in November.

CBS was also able to make it a two-parter to really take advantage of the situation with double the programming and double the commercial intake.

November, February, and May Sweeps are not as big of a deal now, but back in the broadcast network-only days they were HUGE. Imagine movie studios during summer and Christmas breaks. That’s when everybody gets out their big guns. Radar leaving MASH was a big deal as was reflected in the ratings I’m happy to say.

What’s your Friday Question?

EP139: From Russia With Like

Ken takes you on a wacky tour of Scandinavia and Russia – filled with absurdities and atrocities.  What more could anyone ask of a summer vacation?

Listen to the Hollywood & Levine podcast!

What are the mistakes that first time showrunners make?

I was asked by reader Brian Hennessey: "what are the mistakes that first time showrunners make? 

(Note: Whenever I can't think of an appropriate picture I always post Natalie Wood photos.)

1. Not communicating with your staff. It’s not enough to have your vision for the show; you need to clearly share it with your other writers. Don’t just assume. It’ll be hard enough for them without trying to figure out what’s in your head. Same is true with your editor and directors.

2. Be very organized. Time will go by much faster than you think. From day one lay out a plan. You want so many outlines by this date, so many first drafts by that date, etc.

3. Don’t squander that period before production begins. It’s easy to knock off early or move meetings back. But this is golden time before the crunch when actors arrive, cameras roll, and a thousand additional details require your attention.

4. Accept the fact that the first draft of the first script you receive from every staff member will look like a script from the last show they were on. It will take them time to adapt to your show.

5. Remember that every writer is not a “five-tool player” as they say in baseball. By that I mean, some may be strong at story but not jokes, or punch-up but not drafts. Not everybody is good at everything.  Consider that when putting together your staff.

6. Hire the best writers not your best friends.

7. Hire at least one experienced writer. Otherwise, on top of everything else you're doing, you're re-inventing the wheel. 

8. Don’t show favoritism to some writers over others. It destroys morale and no one loves a teacher’s pet.

9. Pick your fights with the network and studio. Don’t go to war over every little note. Antagonizing everyone all the time is a good way to ensure this will be your only showrunning gig. Yes, you’re an artist and you’re trying to protect your vision. And yes, a lot of the notes are moronic, but you have to hear them out. You have to consider them. You have to do the ones you can live with. The best way to get your way is to get them on your side.

10. Don’t overwork your staff. This goes back to being organized. There’s only so many times you can whip the same horse. Your people are dedicated to the show but not to the extent you are. They’re not getting any back end deals. They’re not getting interviewed by ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY. This show may be your whole life but they want to go home.

11. Praise your staff. If they turn in a good draft, let ‘em know. This sounds like such a simple thing but you’d be surprised how many showrunners don’t do it.

12. Respect the crew and learn their names. When you walk onto the set, greet them.  They’re not just a bunch of convicts picking up litter along the side of the expressway. They’re dedicated highly-trained professionals who never get any recognition. Take the time to know who they are.

13. Take care of yourself. On the weekends get plenty of sleep. Eat right. Relax. It’s a long haul.

14. Never make your staff work late nights if you’re not there with them.

15. Don’t get so caught up in the work and the grind that you forget to have some fun. You’re running your own show. That’s a rare opportunity. Enjoy it… or at least as much as you can before you have to put out another fire.

16. A good way to completely destroy any morale is to automatically put your name on every script and share credit with every writer. You may win in arbitration but you lose your troops. The trade off is not worth it. You’re getting paid more money than anybody already. Let your writers receive full credit and residuals.

17. Accept responsibility. When things go wrong (and they will) ultimately you’re the one in charge. Not saying you can’t make changes in personnel if someone doesn’t work out, but don’t be constantly playing the blame game. You’re the showrunner. You take the hit.

18. On the other hand, don’t take all the credit. When ideas and scripts and jokes come from other people, publicly acknowledge their contribution.

19. #MeToo. It's 2019. Don't be an idiot for God sakes.

The bottom line is a showrunner has to develop people skills and management skills as well as writing skills. You may have enormous talent but that will do you no good when your staff firebombs your car with you in it. Good luck. The work is hard but the rewards are enormous.  Wasn't Natalie gorgeous? 

Valerie Harper

Unfortunately, I never met Valerie Harper. I saw her once on stage and went to numerous RHODA filmings but never actually met her. Judging by the photos on Facebook I think I’m the only one in show business who didn’t. But I know all those other people who did and they all, to a person, loved her. And she made a huge impact on popular culture. Rhoda Morgenstern was a clearly Jewish character who was embraced by America.

Trust me when I say you would create a Jewish character for a sitcom pilot and the network would say, “Uh, she’s too urban” or my favorite: “She’s too… New York.” We knew what that was code for.

But Valerie broke through all of that. Her “Rhoda” was unapologeticaly Jewish and as such, unapologeticaly FUNNY. She brought a warmth and likability to that character that not only made her accepted, but beloved by the public. When they spun her off into her own series her wedding was seen by 53 million people. THE BIG BANG THEORY grand series finale drew 18 million.

In fairness, a tremendous amount of credit for Rhoda’s success was also the “voice” of that character, MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW writer Treva Silverman. Treva knew just how to write her. It’s quite a trick to make an ethnic character authentic, universal, sympathetic, and hilariously funny. But Treva’s words and Valerie’s performance elevated Rhoda to a television icon.

I invite you to watch the first few seasons of THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW when she and Treva were really hitting their stride. I’ll be honest, THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW was never as good after both she and Treva left.

But that was a long time ago. Valerie played many great parts, touched many lives, and took many photos in the subsequent 40 years. I’m sorry I never did get the chance to meet her. And thank her. I did get to write for her. Okay, it was a RHODA spec that was rejected all over town but STILL.

The thing is, you didn’t need to meet Valerie Harper to love her. And 53 million people did. To me that’s an even greater legacy.

Some labored thoughts on this holiday

Seems like only yesterday the Labor Day holiday songs started flooding the radio. As I sit here on this low cyber-traffic weekend I’m reminded of how, as a kid, September was always a big month. So much to look forward to.

As hard as it is to believe, when the networks unveiled their fall shows it was a BIG DEAL. A real big deal. Remember “NBC WEEK”? When they rolled out their new fare they also offered full-color glossy yearbooks you could send away for. I must’ve had six. Now it’s “NBC WEAK.” CBS had a half hour “preview show” in which they would show snippets of their new shows. It got the highest rating of the week. During the summer you would watch daytime game shows just to see the promos. ABC usually got the jump on the other networks by premiering their new lineup first. THE JETSONS was water cooler stuff.

And to coincide with the new season, US automakers unveiled their new models for the year. All summer they would tease you by showing the cars hidden under large sheets. Major speculation over whether the Chevy Impala’s fins could get any larger. They were already the size of A-frame houses. And what was this new car Ford was introducing called the Mustang?

And of course, we had the Jerry Lewis Telethon.  Almost 24 hours of the most saccharine, maudlin, cheesy glitz-filled entertainment/sales pitch hosted by the incomparable Jerry Lewis.  At a moment's notice he could go from tears to cross-eyed clown.  And always on hand was Tony Orlando, Norm Crosby, jugglers, and cabaret singers from the best Travelodge lounges in Henderson.   By hour 19 Jerry usually went totally off the rails.  All live.   That, my friends, was MUST SEE TV.

Jerry's gone.  The telethon is either gone or so practically gone that it is gone.  There's no "NBC Week."   At least BETTER CALL SAUL and the BREAKING BAD sequel are coming soon.  Screw the new Chevy!  Bring on the Fall!

Weekend Post

Okay, I’m back!  Everybody (well, not “everybody” – five of you) have wondered what my “big project” is. It’s a new play I'm writing and I was on a research trip that took me to Denmark, Estonia, Russia, and Sweden.

Ever since I was on MASH I learned the value of research – especially to nice places I can write off.

If you tune into my podcast later this week I’ve got a humorous take on my Scandinavian adventures and I’ll introduce you to a couple of interesting people I met along the way.

So thanks for your patience in the lag time between writing and then seeing your comments posted. There was a nine hour time difference and the Baltic Sea is not an internet hot spot.

I love to travel – well, let me amend that – I love to BE there, I HATE to travel. But then, who doesn’t these days? If they could beam me to Copenhagen I’d go back this weekend.

But I’m not a very adventurous traveler. I’ve been to China and now Russia and am constantly paranoid behind the Iron Curtain. Men and women in starched uniforms with stars on their epaulets scare the crap out of me. There’s always that fear that something will be amiss with my passport or visa or their intel has told them I did MANNEQUIN 2 and I wind up in Siberia. All of sudden, being seen a whole bunch of times on CNN was not a good thing.

I think I make it worse because I try to appear casual and insouciant. So I probably come off looking like an idiot.  And one thing I’ve noticed about both Russian and Chinese border patrols – they never smile. So I know not to joke with them. I’m not going to make Stalin laugh. Any authority figure who checks my passport could be the one to say, “Come with me please” and I’m never found again. Hey, MANNEQUIN 2 was a group effort.

But I managed to stay out of any gulags and had a fun and productive trip. More details when my new podcast episode drops mid-week. (And by the way, this week’s episode with Jamie Farr is pretty cool. Check it out.)

In the meantime, I thought I’d share a few photos. Many more will appear this week and next on my Instagram page. Follow me at Hollywood and Levine.

Happy Labor Day Weekend.

Why I love Copenhagen

The Little Mermaid statue -- big whoop

Everybody rides bikes in Copenhagen

This is how you drink vodka.  That's lard on the piece of bread. 

I guess in Stockholm a father is not allowed to hold a child's hand

Friday Questions

Closing out the summer with Friday Questions. But first...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my gorgeous, talented, amazing daughter, Annie.

Jeff Alexander has the first FQ:

Has there ever been a series (don't need to name names) where a script -- either from freelancers or staff contributors -- got as far as a complete "table read" where everyone admitted that it just wouldn't work? If that has happened, what's the recourse? Is there a "backup" script or is that one sent back to be reworked in a great hurry? I ask because that apparently happened on The Dick Van Dyke Show once -- script name was Art Vs. Baloney by a freelancer whose name is now forgotten. The script was apparently trashed and I honestly don't know what they did to replace it.

Yes, it does happen. And most shows even have budgeted one or two scripts that they’ll eat and never produce.

Hopefully, when that happens you have next week’s script in decent shape so you can polish it up and have it ready the next day. But occasionally you have to shut down for a day or two, and that gets costly.

But let me say this -- it’s one thing if a script bombs at the table. It’s another if a script does well at the table but the asshole star just doesn’t want to do it. He didn’t get enough jokes or didn’t come off looking heroic enough, whatever. That’s bullshit. Beware of working for “stars.” Or should I say “certain” stars?

From Ed:

When you create a series, you obviously come up with the initial characters and premise, but eventually other writers will start contributing their own ideas and stories. What's it like as a show creator to see others take your characters and story in directions that may not have occurred to you? I'd imagine it could be exciting to see your creation take on a life of its own beyond what you'd initially conceived.

I think it’s great. It means the show has legs and can grow in unexpected directions. The hard part is initially getting your staff to write the show in your style. But once they do they begin to add their own contributions and point of view and the show really flourishes.

It’s also nice in that case, that the show’s creator acknowledges his staff’s contribution. Vince Gilligan is a champ at that. He openly credits other writers for some of the best moments and scenes of BREAKING BAD.

Other showrunners are not that gracious.

Keith R.A. DeCandido asks:

I've been on a kick where I've been watching the Sidney Freedman episodes of M*A*S*H. He was such a great character, and Allan Arbus did superb work with him, from his first appearance asking Blake what he's supposed to do with Klinger ("ask him if his seams are straight???") to the finale where he helps Hawkeye with his psychotic break.

I notice that you only wrote one of his appearances, "The Billfold Syndrome," but since you were a story editor, you might know the answer to this more general question: how much research went into Freedman's appearances? I know that Army psychiatrists weren't really as much of a thing in the Korean War as they were Vietnam and after, but were Freedman's cases ever based on actual psychiatric cases in Korea or Vietnam (or World War II or another conflict)?

As writers of the show we rewrote most scripts so wrote a fair amount of Sidney Freedman in our day, uncredited.

If the story required it, we did consult a psychiatrist to make sure we were handling those situations responsibly.

“The Billfold Syndrome” was a real thing and sprung out of the research. When David and I wrote the episode we first spent an evening with a noted psychiatrist who walked us through the entire hypnosis process. I’m very proud of how authentic that episode turned out and that other mental health professionals, upon seeing it on the air, gave it a thumbs up.

And finally, from Sam Stebbins:

Do you think Sunnyside (an upcoming NBC sitcom) is a good example of why sitcoms shouldn’t be given trailers? People in the comments are judging the show based on clips that are most likely only from the pilot. It looks like a potentially funny show with a good premise.

Networks are leading with their chins when they put out these trailers. They leave themselves open for trolls and bad buzz. I’m sure they also lose viewers who might’ve sampled the pilot but after seeing the trailer decided not to bother.

And most of the trailers are horrible, especially the comedies. I can’t think of a single comedy trailer for a new show that I thought was remotely funny or inviting.

That said, I guess the networks feel the value of them outweigh the possible pitfalls. For their sake, I hope they’re right.

What’s your Friday Question, and again, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANNIE!!!

EP138: Meet Corporal Klinger – Jamie Farr

Jamie Farr talks about his long career, his experiences on MASH, and a harrowing story that took place in Korea. Other than a near-death experience, lots of fun tales.  

Listen to the Hollywood & Levine podcast!

The new old people

Came upon this and just had to share.  I've always maintained that the funniest comedy comes out of truth.  Here' a terrific example.  The comedian is Lachlan Patterson and this is from the Halifax Comedy Fest.  Whatever your age,

I'll bet you laugh.

Don't be afraid of Virginia Woolf

Following up on my post from a few weeks ago about comedy being dissed by the theatre, one of the commenters, Doug McEwan made a great point about attending comedy plays in England and by act two they all turned into “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?” It reminded me of a personal story.

Back in the early 2000’s I wrote my first play. It was a comedy of course. And at the time, the great Tony-winning theatre director, Jerry Zaks was out in Los Angeles transitioning into multi-camera sitcom directing. I was teaching him camera blocking (which is like a ballplayer learning how to hit from Bob Uecker).

Anyway, I asked if he would graciously read my play. How great to get feedback from a real theatre professional!

He read it, and we met for breakfast to discuss it. He said he loved the first act – the characters, situation, it was very funny. He was really having a good time with the play and then somewhere in the second act (to use the exact same reference) he said, “It turned into Virginia Woolf. What happened?”

I explained that I was worried that since this was a stage play it would appear I was writing a sitcom unless I included some heavy dramatic passages. In this case I had a couple really throw off the gloves and tear into each other.

Jerry said I should lift out that part completely. It wasn’t necessary. My comedy was about real characters facing problems that were serious to them and that’s all that mattered. Stop trying to be Edward Albee.

It was a relief to rewrite that section more in line with the rest of the piece and I have not fallen into that trap since. That was maybe the best playwrighting advice I ever received. Thank you, Jerry Zaks.

Dramatic scenes need to be organic; they need to be earned. And if a comedy doesn’t warrant that, then don’t shoehorn them in.

But the theatre’s message that comedy can’t be taken seriously even gets into the heads of comedy playwrights. Or at least those starting out. So stand your ground I say! Even though it’s a crazy, almost reckless position, dare to make your comedies funny.

"Now what do we do?"

Here’s what I sort of noticed – when a TV series or limited TV series starts with a high concept premise and becomes successful, the series generally seems to wander in subsequent years.

To some degree that was LOST, although they did manage some pretty inventive future storylines (which they weren’t able to successfully resolve). But for me it was really apparent on the 2004 Fox series, PRISON BREAK. The first season was great. They broke out of prison. Season two all the convicts were just running around. In later seasons they constructed other prisons for them to escape from, but the shark had long since been jumped.

Series that are imported and Americanized often have this problem because usually the original series has a finite number of episodes and an ending. But here we have to keep the show going. A good example might be HOMELAND. Their first season was GREAT. But once the “Brody” issue was resolved then came “Now what do we do?”

IN TREATMENT is another example. Season one followed the lead of the original Israeli series. In season two they were on their own and it looked it.

DEAD TO ME was renewed recently for a second season.  Everything was resolved and in fact the Judy character should go to prison.  Let's see how they wiggle out of that.  

Was MAD MEN ever as good as its first season? And even though the series remained excellent, I’d still put season one of THE SOPRANOS above all the others.

DEXTER had the serial killer of the season and other than the first and whatever season John Lithgow was on, the show never recaptured the magic.

At this point, I should say there are exceptions. For me the best one is BREAKING BAD. That series just got better and more compelling.

But for every BREAKING BAD there were five ORPHAN BLACK’s. I sooooo loved the first season of that series and by the end didn’t give a shit about anything. “Now let’s try this… now let’s try that… now let’s try something else.” The seams were definitely showing.

I can come up with other examples and I’m sure you will come up with even more.

But the latest example is KILLING EVE. The first season Sandra Oh is trying to stop a fascinating lady assassin/psychopath. They eventually confront each other, big shocking twist at the end, and it’s on to season two. And although there were some wonderful scenes and moments in the second season, here the producers had to concoct reasons to put them together; the storyline went from implausible to slightly insane. And ended with the now-obligatory shocking ending. I can almost bet the writers are sitting around right now saying, “Now what?”

It’s the Faustian contract you sign when you do high concept series. They’re not meant to be dragged-out for five seasons. So often season two becomes a whole different show. The TV version of “a sequel.” Which is fine except it’s rarely as good as the original show. You can’t beat Tony Soprano’s mother putting a hit out on him, or Dexter learning the “Ice Truck Killer” is really his brother.

I just hope that if there’s a season five of KILLING EVE, Sandra & the assassin are not running a dress shop together in Soho.

Weekend Post

If you think America's Got Talent, just wait'll you see what SWEDEN'S GOT TALENT is serving up.  He's actually from Australia but it's a universal talent that can be appreciated anywhere fine art is revered.  Enjoy.   

Friday Questions

One of my favorite features I’m told, here are more Friday Questions.

Bryan Thomas starts us off:

How did Bebe Neuwirth get discovered for Lilith? She was obviously a real find and became one of my favorite characters and actresses. She is immensely talented with immense range and great instincts, but before Cheers I had never heard of her.

Bebe had a big career in Broadway as an actress/dancer prior to CHEERS. She won a Tony in 1984. That year she was in LA and to my knowledge just auditioned for the role of Lilith. But it was only supposed to be a one-shot in a teaser. Which was fine with her; she planned to return to Broadway.

But the character worked and the Charles Brothers brought her back a few times and it became clear the Frasier-Lilith relationship was lightening in a bottle.

Jasper asks:

I used to read books on screenwriting and they always made a point of saying to never include anything that isn't absolutely necessary, which in theory makes sense. But what I find from years of watching TV and movies is that following that rule also tends to give away the story, because you hear a seemingly unnecessary detail and you say, okay, well, now I know what's going to happen, because they wouldn't have included that detail unless it was to set up this plot point.

I'm interested in your thoughts on following this rule on necessary information only while preventing it from giving away the course of the story.

That rule discounts the value of “red herrings.” Those are basically facts and plot points meant to throw the reader off the scent, especially in mysteries. If the clues only lead to one suspect there’s no suspense. So red herrings serve a purpose.

But otherwise, adding plot points that have no bearing on the story only clutter it up. I do see the rationale that if it’s not something necessary it shouldn’t be included.

From ScottyB:

I have a scriptwriting/partnership question. To make a long question short, how is someone out in total rural cowtown with half-done scripts that have hit a brick wall (because working by yourself in a vacuum runs its course sooner or later) find someone of like mind? (And really, that’s my problem here.) A middle of nowhere place where there’s no community college/night creative class courses to hook into, etc etc etc day a good 50+ miles away from the closest Craigslist outlet, at best.

Nowadays there are script programs that allow two people to work on the same script from different locations. And with Skype and Facetime you could also communicate with your partner.

So it’s possible to carry on a long-distance partnership.

Now, the issue becomes FINDING that partner. Here I’m just speculating but I imagine there are Facebook groups on writing and other social media sites where wannabe writers congregate. Go on several of those and announce you’re looking for a partner. Who knows? You might get lucky.

But make sure your new partner knows that if someone wants to buy one of your scripts that you’ll move to LA or New York or wherever the show is being made. Even if you have to fly in for a meeting, you need to make the commitment.

And finally, from Michael:

I have seen articles that THE OFFICE is by far the most viewed program on streaming services, but I rarely see it's reruns on broadcast or mainstream cable channels these days - seems like it is relegated to hard-to-find channels like COZI TV. Do you think that this is deliberate to get people to watch it on Netflix or do you think it's repeats failed to draw decent ratings when they were shown on broadcast or mainstream cable channels? Are only 'cord-cutters' interested in watching it?

I think when people can binge-watch with no commercials, why watch a series in syndication all hacked up with 10 minute commercial breaks for drugs with side effects that can kill you?

AS A REMINDER:  For the next week I am working on a big project and will not have as much internet access as I normally do.  So it will take longer to moderate comments.  Hang in there and continue to ask your Friday Questions.  I will get to them eventually.   Thanks much.  Ken

EP137: Jobs I Didn’t Get

For all the jobs that writers, even successful writers, get – there is always a long list of jobs they didn’t get.  This week Ken shares his.  Hopefully this will inspire you to keep pushing. 

Listen to the Hollywood & Levine podcast!

10 1/2 years ago today

I did this last month and it got good response.  Since very few read the archives (and I'm occasionally lazy), here's a Friday Question post from March of 2009.   Let me deep dive so you don't have to. 

First up, Joe:

What's it like when a guest star comes in and wants to "help" in the episode he or she will be acting. I'm specifically thinking of John Cleese on Cheers.

That episode was brilliantly written by Peter Casey & David Lee. They just perfectly captured his voice and during the week of production Cleese might have offered some minor suggestions and tweaks but what you see is what Peter & David wrote.

When David Isaacs and I wrote the CHEERS episode with Johnny Carson I went to Mr. Carson before the filming and offered to change anything he didn’t feel was right and he said, “Nope. This is great.” And he did it word for word. I love that man.

Speaker of the House, Tip O’Neill guested on CHEERS season one. The original scene had him at a urinal next to Norm. He didn’t think that was appropriate (congressmen actually were worthy of respect back then) so we adjusted the scene.

I do seem to recall directing Mike Ditka once and he suggested a couple of joke fixes. I then gave him some coaching tips.

John wonders:

Ken, with the more permissive (and HBO-inspired) rules the networks have adopted for their show content in the past 10-15 years, are there any episodes you and David did from the 70s and 80s that you look back at now and think it could have been done better if some of the gags allowed today would have been permitted by Standards and Practices back then (or would looser rules resulted in the network folks forcing more shows to gratuitously sexual innuendo-up their dialogue and plot lines because they thought it would add a rating point or two)?

It really depends on the episode and subject matter. Yes, there are a lot of shows we wrote that more license would have been appreciated. But there is also something to be said for being able to be funny and sophisticated without having to resort to profanity. Sometimes that added license leads to easy but cheap laughs. It takes a little skill and elegance to come up with a genuine funny response instead of just having the character say “What the fuck?!” Both will get a laugh. Especially if Johnny Carson says it.

Rogers Motley of Richmond Virginia asks:

With all of the hubbub surrounding the changing of the guard at the NBC late night talk shows, what do you think makes a good late night television talk show host?

Most talk show hosts can be funny and spontaneous (to some degree) but the big question is can they connect with the audience? Is there a likeability? Can viewers really relate to this person? It’s a real X factor that doesn’t depend on age or even nationality.

The humor can be biting, gentle, sly, topical, whatever – but the key element is this: The audience has to get the feeling that it’s the host and them against the world, not the host against them. I personally find Letterman much funnier than Leno but at times I feel he crosses that line and the jibes are at the audience’s expense. Leno never does that. And for my money, that’s why he beats Letterman even though David has the far superior show.

And then there’s Tyra Banks. What the fuck?!

Editing shows for syndication

When shows are edited for syndication I never know who exactly does the editing. All I know is that they usually do a piss-poor job.

MASH in particular. That’s because we had two and sometimes three storylines all dovetailing. Each episode was intricately plotted. Editors will often just lift entire scenes. As a result one or two stories suddenly stop making sense. I suppose it’s a lot easier to just lift a 2:30 scene than going through the whole show and painstakingly edit lines that won’t be missed.

And after these shows are edited I don’t believe there’s anyone overseeing the process and screening the episodes to make sure they still make sense.

In a first season CHEERS David Isaacs and I wrote, Carla made a joke about her children being adopted. An adoption agency was horribly offended, contacted the president of NBC and the joke was removed for the first rerun. It was in the teaser so an easy lift.

However, when the show went into syndication the offending joke was back and has remained ever since. And no further complaints were ever filed (at least that I’m aware of). Something else was taken out instead.

And now of course, there’s another insidious process – digitally speeding up the show. Some are done deftly and others make the cast sound like Minnie Mouse.

You would think that independent stations who paid fortunes for these syndicated packages would insist that the episodes at least could be comprehended. But I guess not. The studios make their money, the stations get their ratings, and the only losers are (as always) the viewers.

That said, years ago KTLA, Channel 5 in Los Angeles aired the movie David and I wrote, VOLUNTEERS. They (or someone) edited it to squeeze  in more commercials. And I can honestly say it’s the first time I ever thought they didn’t take out enough. It was better with the edits and could have been better still with a few more judicious trims.

MASH is on a number of cable networks. One (I don’t remember which) plays the full versions of the episodes and just runs long. I thought that was ingenious. Who says a show has to end exactly at the top of the hour? Especially now when most people record the shows for later playback. As I recall, they were aired in the middle of the night. To me that was smart programming. If you know a network is going to air the unedited version, wouldn’t you make the effort to record it? More people probably watch those episodes, even though they might air at 3 AM, than if they were on at 7 PM but hacked to shit.

Also, when these shows are on a variety of platforms, why watch a cut-up version of an episode when you can go to Netflix or Hulu or get the DVD and watch it in its original form?

MASH used to be only in syndication on local stations. Those stations had exclusivity. You were stuck with the chopped versions. But now there are so many other options for watching. So if your network is airing it – or CHEERS or GOLDEN GIRLS or REBA if that’s what they have in their library – why not take that extra time to show the show right? Believe me, people watching at 3 in the morning have no idea what time it is. Some aren’t sure of the day. So the next episode starts at 3:06 – who cares?

I know this post seems long. I’ll make trims for any reprints.

You never know who you'll find

Remember phone books?

I think they still exist to a certain degree, but there was a time (pre-Google) where to find someone’s phone number you had to go to this real thick book that weighed a ton and look them up. I know – how quaint.

You could have an unlisted number, but most people didn’t bother. And there was no robo-calling in the pre-Google era. Celebrities had unlisted numbers but not all. Stan Laurel was in the phone book.

In 1973 I was on vacation in New York. As some of you know, I also dabble in cartooning. My idol was Al Hirschfeld, who did caricatures for the NY Times for like 70 years. (He’s the one who wrote his daughter’s name, Nina, into every drawing.)

On a whim, I looked in the phone book one afternoon and found an Albert Hirschfeld. I decided to call. A gentleman answered. I introduced myself and asked if he was the Al Hirschfeld who did the caricatures. He said yes. I told him I was an amateur cartoonist and would love to meet him. To my astonishment, he said “Sure, come on over.” He had to give me directions, which subway to take, where to get off, etc.

An hour later I was knocking on his door. He welcomed me into his brownstone, ushered me upstairs to his studio (where he made the magic), and I spent the afternoon watching him work and discussing drawing (how to draw hands, how to draw hair, shadowing, etc.)

IT WAS AMAZING.

Hirschfeld died in 2003 at age 99. His last day was spent drawing. He had dinner, went up to bed, and just slipped away. Talk about the way to go!

Just before I left he took out a piece of paper and did this for me:

What an incredible day.  I miss phone books.

Weekend Post

Before we had #MeToo, before we had PC, we had these ACTUAL ads.    Noted without comment except to say, JESUS EFFIN' CHRIST!!?"

Friday Questions

Heading into the “Dog Days of Summer” with some Friday Questions. You ready?

Vincent Saia is.

D.C. Fontana said that when she was teaching screenwriting at AFI she knew the students who had been working on the same script for years were probably not going to become professional writers and Tom Wolf said, "It only takes six to eight weeks to write anything. The rest of the time you're just dancing around the project." Do you also feel the ability to write quickly and on demand necessarily separates the professional writer from the amateur?

I agree with William Goldman.  Writers should go at their own speed but write as much and as quickly as they can. The danger of going too slow is you tend to obsess and try to make every word perfect, which results in stilted scripts. But if you go too fast you miss things.

The distinction between professional and amateur has more to do with the ability to be creative on demand.

From John Schrank:

I really like the two posts on wording and the importance of setup! In Dick Cavett's first book, after some very interesting sections about writing for other comedians, he tells about some of the material he wrote for his own act. He says the right wording is almost always the way it comes to you first. Tweaking it sometimes weakens it. 

Have you found that to be true? His major example was his joke about wedding that was done on the cheap. "I don't know much about caviar, but I do know you're not supposed to get pictures of ballplayers with it." Then he wondered if "cards" was better than "pictures"... or if there needed to be some reference to trading cards in the line before to set it up. He finally decided it was good the way it was.

I disagree with him. Often times the first thought is the most obvious. When David Isaacs and I are writing we often bat around lines back and forth until truly, we can’t remember who came up with it.

However a caveat (to Cavett): In the writers room if someone pitches a joke and everyone laughs it goes in exactly as pitched. Even if it had a funky construction, if it got a laugh it goes in untouched.

To fool with those lines is when you start to over-analyze and kill the joke.

But there is value to tweaking. We’re not Mozart.

Joseph Scarbrough asks:

You've written before about "Good-bye, Radar" originally being written as a single episode to close Season 7, but it was the network that insisted it a two-parter for sweeps, and that when you and David Isaacs re-wrote it as such, you added the subplot about the generator to pad it out with filler for the extra time. So, does that mean everything else about your original script for the episode was still the same? Radar meeting Patty Haven? The circumstance of Uncle Ed passing away? The sudden arrival of wounded canceling Radar's farewell party?

Yes, the whole Radar storyline was in place the end of season 7.

We may have added a couple of new steps to go along with the generator story (which was there for padding), but after Henry’s death we wanted a character to leave and have a happy ending. Giving Radar a possible love interest seemed interesting and showed a side of him we’ve never seen.

The overall theme was his maturity and we felt he now was ready to have a real relationship.  Leaving his teddy bear behind was also our idea.  It seemed the perfect symbol for his having grown up. 

And finally, from JS:

Why when shows get desperate they bring in a baby? It never works. It is the sign of death.

Yep and amen. An argument can be made that a baby opens up a whole new vein of stories, but especially for a romantic comedy, it forces you to put the romance on the back burner while your couple is managing an infant. And those stories are just not as fun and interesting in my opinion.

However, if it’s a supporting character, like say Frasier then the baby really doesn’t alter the series. Frasier’s bar habits didn’t change (although they should have).

A REMINDER:  For the next two weeks I am working on a big project and will not have as much internet access as I normally do.  So it will take longer to moderate comments.  Hang in there and continue to comment and ask Friday Questions.  I will get to them eventually.   Thanks much.  Ken

EP136: Howard Michael Gould Part 2

Ken and Howard discuss their writing process and how it applies to teleplays, features, stage plays, and novels.  And probably whatever task you’re undertaking.

Listen to the Hollywood & Levine podcast!