Tuesday, July 05, 2011

"Hello, I have a collect call from Wesley Snipes..."

Here are some holiday leftovers...

Hope you had a great 4th of July. I did. Went down to Redondo Beach at Great Big Radio Guy’s place to watch the fireworks. And unlike a couple of years ago, there was no thick fog. That was bizarre. They shot off the fireworks anyway. Here's an example.  This was either a one big starburst or series of clusters, but it/they were awesome!

Not surprised that LARRY CROWNE flopped. Writer friend R. R. has a theory: No American film which has any adults riding on motor scooters with helmets on can be any good at all. He’s right.

One of the sponsors of Dodger baseball (at least on Time-Warner Cable) Friday night was AshleyMadison.com. This is a dating website for married people who want to engage in affairs. You have the great Vin Scully calling the game and commercials advocating infidelity. This to me is more unbelievable than the Dodgers filing for bankruptcy.

And if AshleyMadison.com is looking for a new spokesman, can I suggest Chris Hansen, the host of the NBC’s “To Catch a Predator”?

PAGE ONE, the documentary on the New York Times is a terrific movie. It might not be playing in your area because they need all the screens for TRANSFORMERS 3 but keep an eye out for it.

Speaking of TRANSFORMERS, as you probably know, I’m not a huge fan of Michael Bay. Trey Parker & Matt Stone wrote this beautiful love song for TEAM AMERICA that pretty much expresses my sentiments as well. Thanks to my daughter, Annie for alerting me to it.



One of the funniest spec screenplays I ever read was called HORRIBLE BOSSES by Michael Markowitz. I sure hope the movie is good.

Recently, during  one of Sarah Palin's stirring speeches she said Paul Revere's famous ride was to warn the British. Oh really?  Then wouldn't his famous saying be, "You are coming!  You are coming!"? 

Oh the injustice! Derek Jeter is having a horrible year. And he’s been injured a good part of the season (the part where the Yankees are winning). Yet, the baseball fans around the country named him one of the American League starters for the All-Star Game next week. Here’s the injustice – why didn’t Ichiro also get elected? He’s having just as off a year as Jeter. And for that matter, why the snub of Lenny Dykstra? Just cause he’s retired and now in prison? If we’re going to entrust the sacred responsibility of selecting All-Star starters to the fans (after all, the game now means something – what, I don’t know but still), then there’s an obligation to be fair. I’m very disappointed. And I know Lenny is. He called me on PrisonerConnect.com.

Now you’re going to think this is a spoof but it’s NOT. This is a commercial that has run on CNN. There actually is a service called PrisonerConnect.com. Have a look.



Like they say in the commercial: "How can you go wrong?" Women, your lonely nights are over!

How did the Time-Warner Cable Dodger salesmen miss this

There’s supposed to be a big Facebook announcement tomorrow. Speculation is either a new video chat feature or dead people will now be able to poke you.

Great HuffingtonPost headline: Could Wind Farms Blow Earth Off Orbit?

Yes, it’s a tragedy but the irony is just too great. Another recent HuffingtonPost headline: Motorcyclist Dies On Ride Protesting Helmet Law

And finally from HuffPost:  Woman Caught Sneaking Man Out Of Prison in Suitcase After Conjugal Visit.

I hate interleague play.  Glad it's over. 

And finally...

I’m thinking of putting out a home version of 101 WAYS TO LEAVE A GAME SHOW. It comes complete with game board, questions, and explosives.

32 comments:

Jimmy Devine said...

I have to say, since discovering your blog, you have yet to avoid making me laugh, that's no small beer when you consider I live in the UK, and it's raining sideways...

Kevin Arbouet said...

Not to be a nerd but it was actually Ishmael Bissell who warned "us" that the British were coming...

Miss Skip Caray said...

It's pretty easy to figure out why Ichiro didn't make the All-Star team. (Thankfully), we don't have 13-million people living in/near Seattle.

You really hate interleague play? Why?

Here's a Friday question: why do you only get to call 3 innings/game? Is Ricky that all-controlling? It's HIS gig and you'll do what he says or you won't do it at all? Seems a little odd to me. 5-&-4 is a bit more equitable and he can still be the 'dominant' voice. Want me to call him?

Scott Nilsen said...

I appreciate you noticing the helmetless helmet protest fellow. I didn't want to have to stay up late to wait for Letterman or Leno to comment on it.

Great Big Radio Guy said...

Unlike the Dodgers, we're at .500 with the fireworks. Great to have you here for it, and glad you didn't have to read the MLB scoreboard while they were blowing up.

Nathan said...

Shame on you. You're not allowed to say "inmate" anymore. It hurts their feelings.

Ken Levine said...

Miss Skip,

It's standard on most team broadcasts for the number one guy to do six innings and the number two to do three. In the Mariners booth the number two has always done the third, sixth, and seventh. Been that way for probably thirty years. As for Rick, he could not be more gracious, supportive, and easy to work with. I can't tell you what a pleasure it is for me, coming in and out, to have a partner who makes it so easy. Rick is the best!

Hope you'll be listening this weekend.

welcometosherwood said...

Sign me up, too, for the "I hate interleague baseball" club.

Phillip B said...

I can hear Vinnie now -

"And this pinch hitter is brought to you by AshleyMadison.com. When you have to go to the bench, check AshleyMadison.com!"

Miss Skip Caray said...

Yes, I'll be listening, I seldom miss a broadcast. I like Rick, he's a terrrrrific broadcaster. I was just addressing the air-time imbalance. When Dave N. was here, he'd call the first half of the game on TV, then split the 2nd half on the radio. And I think he and Rick split their time evenly, or as close to it as possible. (Now my curiosity will force me to check the other broadcasts on MLB.com, which is always fun to hear the other voices of the game.)

It's just an observation. You guys have the best (legal) jobs in the world!

Thanks for the quick answer, too!

Michael Zand said...

Isn't "Larry Crowne?" Not that it matters. A turd is still a turd no matter what you call it.

Breadbaker said...

If they're going to have interleague play, which basically they do to promote a few "natural" rivalries, they should pool all receipts and expenses for all clubs. Otherwise, the A's and Giants are getting three games each with guaranteed sellouts and no travel expenses, while the Tigers are flying to play in an empty stadium against their "natural" rivals the Rockies or Diamondbacks every year. They could do one round where they use the other team's rules for a novelty and just bag the damn thing as far as I'm concerned. As a Mariners fan, if I never saw the Padres again, I'd be very, very content.

Tallulah Morehead said...

"Motorcyclist Dies On Ride Protesting Helmet Law"

His dying words: "I was just trying to make an American Film that doesn't suck."

D. McEwan said...

Speaking as a native of Redondo Beach, yes, aren't our July 4ths great? And in the background off to the left, you get the Malaga Cove fireworks also. Did you run into my sister? She still lives threre.

Kirk said...

"You are coming! You are coming!"

Ha!

Mike Barer said...

I'll be listening, however I will continue to agree to disagree on the issue of interleague play.
It's all a matter of getting what New York, Chicago, and LA have always had, a chance to see every team.

Anonymous said...

The Huffington Post headline was from The Onion.

Cheers,

Alan Tomlinson

l.a.guy said...

Tallulah Morehead said...
"His dying words: "I was just trying to make an American Film that doesn't suck."

*golf clap*

Anonymous said...

The American Leagues doesn't even play baseball. Get rid of the DH. It's a shame the NL has to play them in the World Series.......

cshel said...

The death of that anti-helmet motorcycle guy was such a tragic, funny irony in so many ways.

Stephen Colbert did a hilarious reenactment of Paul Revere's ride - according to Sarah Palin's version.

Horrible Bosses was a funny script. It's next on my list of movies to see.

I love fireworks so much, and I've only missed seeing them on the 4th of July twice in my life.

The first time, I was in England, where apparently they don't celebrate the 4th of July for some strange reason. (I'll have to ask Sarah Palin about that.) It felt so weird to me to be anywhere where it was just another day.

The second time, in my own personal tragic irony, I had just moved to a new neighborhood and was unaware that they had an annual fireworks show literally one block from my home. My friend and I drove to the opposite side of the Valley to see an annual fireworks show - that was cancelled that year! I got back home just in time to get caught in the traffic after the other fireworks show , which is how I found out about it.

The End.

Kevin Arnold said...

Ishmael Bissel and The Raiders!

No, doesn't quite sing, does it?

Cap'n Bob said...

I'd like to see the DH be part of the National League rules. A pitcher batting is a wasted at bat.

Sue said...

I usually do not comment on another commenter however Breadbaker you hit a baseball nerve with your "if I never see the Padres again I'd be very, very content". My Padres are some of the reason you are one game back of .500. In the 6 games that have been played the Mariners have won five of them. You should be happier then hell to see my Padres.

As for the DH it is not baseball the way it was meant to be played. What exactly does the Manager have to do in the AL? He doesn't have to decide to keep the pitcher in to bat or replace his bat and loose a pitcher that may be pitching a hell of a good close game, to get a sure fire bat, and do a double switch. (I think I just had a run on sentence or two.) There is no strategy you just have hired guns that come off your bench. As for Cap'n Bob there are those pitchers that can hit or put down that nasty bunt that moves the runner (see Greg Maddux for one). Plus for the most part the pitchers in the American League are human rain delays in the length of time between pitches.

Okay my rant for the day.

jbryant said...

Looks like Markowitz's HORRIBLE BOSSES was rewritten by the team of John Francis Daley (the actor who starred as Sam on the great FREAKS AND GEEKS and is currently on BONES) and Jonathan Goldstein.

Buttermilk Sky said...

I also hate interleague play, but you gotta admit it's fun to watch AL pitchers try to bat. Even Bartolo Colon's Yankee teammates were cracking up.

DwWashburn said...

I gave up what little interest I had in the All Star game when interleague play and the televised batting practice aka Home Run Derby began.

However here's the part I've never understood. Most of the time when someone complains about who is in or out of the All Star game their reasoning is usually "Player X has had such a good start to the season that it's a shame to see Player Y who is having his first off year ever taking his spot." Right in the title of the game, it says ALL Star not "hot for a month or two" star. I mean, come on now. All it really is is glorified spring training. I would rather see Albert Pujols in a slump year than Jose Reyes who is hitting 55 points above his career average.

And you're right. I take a 2 1/2 week vacation from baseball during the interleague travesty.

xjill said...

I don't get the interleague hate...well, I get it, but I respectfully disagree.

gwangung said...

Actually. I think the DH puts MORE strategy and options in the game.

You have to weigh individual match ups more and think two, three batters ahead more. There are fewer easy outs (unless you're facing the Mariners); you have to match a tiring pitcher against a lineup more and guess more at the substitutions the opposing manager goes.

bevo said...

"There’s supposed to be a big Facebook announcement tomorrow. Speculation is either a new video chat feature or dead people will now be able to poke you."

Nope. Wrong on both accounts. Facebook is buying PrisonerConnect.

VP81955 said...

I'd like to see the DH be part of the National League rules. A pitcher batting is a wasted at bat.

I guess you didn't Livan Hernandez's beautiful (pinch-hit) sacrifice bunt for Washington in the 10th inning Monday against the Cubs, advancing Jayson Werth to second. He stole third on the next pitch (the first by incoming reliever Carlos Marmol), then scored the game-winner on a wild pitch a few pitches later.

I'm not necessarily opposed to the DH; among other things, it allows the number-nine hitter to serve as a quasi-leadoff guy, sort of what White Sox manager Tony LaRussa did with Ozzie Guillen in 1985 and '86 before Ken Harrelson stupidly sacked him.

For interleague games, I'd like to see the visiting team's rules used, so people in traditional NL towns (Pittsburgh, Cincinnati) can experience the DH for a few games and vice versa for traditional AL towns such as Detroit and Cleveland.

Jimmy JoJo Jr. said...

I caught the PrisonerConnect.com ad during an episode of "The Daily Show" last week and had to rewind it to show it to my wife. She asked me if it was part of the program.

Most inappropriate use of babies in a 21st century ad (outside of that weird denim diaper commercial)? I think we have a front-runner.

Lou H. said...

How do they come up with these interleague matchups? Mets-Yankees I understand. But what do the Phillies have in common with the Mariners and Rangers (besides Cliff Lee)?

Fans won't want to miss next week's All-Star game. I watch to see how the managers deftly maintain a balance between playing to win the WS home-field advantage and making sure the players don't injure their fingernails.