Tuesday, August 18, 2020

Do I have to thank the Academy?

There’s a Jewish expression called “kenahora.” It’s Yiddish for “keep the evil eye away. Don’t tempt evil.” It’s a superstition that if you assume something you might be jinxing it.

Here’s an example of a kenahora:

Because the Emmy awards this year are going to be virtual and a technical nightmare, I understand the Academy is requesting that all nominees record their acceptance speeches in advance. That way they’ll all be ready when the awards are announced.

Talk about tempting fate...

From what I understand, a lot of nominees are uncomfortable doing this, and I don’t blame them. It’s bad enough to lose, but to lose AND have delivered a speech?

How many loser speeches will have “This only proves that if you follow your heart, never give up, and believe in yourself you’ll ultimately triumph!”? How many will thank Jesus who ultimately won’t come through for them?

To me, the only advantage to this is that the speeches will probably be shorter than usual. Who wants to ramble on for five minutes when you know that once you lose, members of the Academy will be playing back your speech and laughing?

Good luck to all the winners. And I really feel bad this year for the losers.

23 comments :

Troy McClure said...

Preparing an acting award acceptance speech is something Trump supporters Scott Baio, Kristy Swanson, Antonio Sabato Jr, James Woods and Jon Voight no longer have to worry about.

Not that Baio, Swanson and Sabato ever had to worry about that.

Pete Grossman said...

And what if the prerecorded speeches of the nominees who didn't win the are somehow leaked? Nah, that could never happen.

Kevin said...

You just know that somebody will leak the acceptance speeches from all the losers, too.

Orangutanagram said...

I would do something like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXOebOaBFV4

Wendy M. Grossman said...

I feel sure this was not your mission in posting this, Ken, but you have explained to me the meaning of the title of the first episode of the second season of TRANSPARENT, so I'm very happy!

wg

Matt said...

If we get shorter more coherent speeches they should make them do it every year.

Mike Bloodworth said...

Deuteronomy 6:16, Matthew 4:7.

If Ken's thesis is true then maybe the anti-Trumpers should all prepare congratulatory statements on the president's reelection. Thereby jinxing his possible victory. It couldn't hurt.

Off Topic: Ken, did you hear that scientists in the Czech Republic have "assigned a robot to write a performable stage play by January 2021?" (Sorry. Don't have a link)
I can picture it now, at some future Ten-minute play festival it comes down to Levine vs. the machine. Who would win?
In other places I've jokingly said that it's only a matter of time before some computer algorithm or A.I. will be writing sitcoms. And based on a lot of what I've seen lately, who's to say it isn't already happening?

M.B.

YEKIMI said...

So this may be the first time the show ends on schedule! No long blathering speeches, no actors, etc. trying to yell over the music as they're being played off. All the director has to do is hit the "stop" button on the player. I also wonder how many actors, etc. would be leery of doing this, all it would take it some video editor somewhere to take their recording and edit it to make them look like a blithering idiot or a Mensa candidate.

thirteen said...

The Grammys used to be like this. All the winners were known well beforehand but, one year, when Rowan & Martin were hosting -- which shows you how long ago this was -- they pretaped acceptance speeches from all the Best Song (or whatever the top award was) nominees, and ran the one from the winner at the end of the show. And they were *proud* of doing this for the Very First Time. (It was Art Garfunkel accepting for him and Paul Simon, BTW.)

thirteen said...

Oh, and this: "Ken, did you hear that scientists in the Czech Republic have 'assigned a robot to write a performable stage play by January 2021?'"

Czech writer Karel Čapek wrote R.U.R., a play about robots for which Čapek created the word "robot." The play premiered on January 25, 1921.

And I'm not a robot, since you asked.

blinky said...

No Jimmy McGill or Kim Wexler....no Emmys. Shame! SHAME!

Anonymous said...

@Troy McClure
Wow, Troy, you're gloating that Trump supporters can't get acting jobs in Hollywood anymore.
They could have used more of that kind of spirit in the early 1950's

Charles Bryan said...

As long as there's no grid of people applauding at home. I generally enjoyed the first night of the convention but those occasional displays of The Clapping Bunch weirded me out. Kinda depressing.

Lauren said...

The Cannes Film Festival winners are told they have won beforehand, thus they have time to prepare something appropriate.

Another thought, is this is like printing the World Series teams shirts ahead of time (?) Like they do.

Hollywoodaholic said...

Completely random; maybe a Friday question, but why all the love for the 'sit-com' "Fawlty Towers" like it's some kind of 12-episode masterpiece? John Cleese's Basil is, admittedly, a great character, and boy does he sell the physical humor and put out the energy. But seeing it again recently, it's just not terribly clever OR funny. An episode of "Frasier," any episode, probably has more laughs. Sure, multiple writing staffs make a difference versus just Cleese and Connie Booth on FT, but I just expected something more with the reputation. What's your take?

Buttermilk Sky said...

KEN! This Saturday on Turner Classic Movies, twenty-four hours of NATALIE WOOD!

(Rolling blackouts permitting.)

Al in PDX said...

Best acceptance speech ever ... by John Cleese.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_JUBgPHYmY

Troy McClure said...

Anonymous (if that is your real name)

Ordinary Republicans should never be blacklisted. I would defend the right of any celebrity to be a Republican.

Supporting Trump is something else entirely. I cut slack to anyone who voted for him in 2016 sincerely believing what he was selling. But if you're still supporting this abomination who has degraded and disgraced the office of president like no other president before, then you are firmly on the wrong side of history.

I'm not going to list all his crimes and all the ways he has poisoned the US, mainly because this isn't a political blog but also it would take a month to list all his appalling acts, but suffice to say that for the first time American democracy and freedom is under threat from a sitting president who is actively trying to disenfranchise millions of voters. This is brazen, daylight criminality and nothing less than an act of treason.

History won't only remember this repulsive man but also all those who excused and defended and justified his every lie, every obscene attack on others, every betrayal of the Constitution, and every subversion of democracy. The one upside is that you've all justified so much disgusting shit in the last 4 years, things that would have seen a Democrat president impeached within a week for doing, that you will never ever ever be able to get morally indignant over the next Democrat president. These 4 years in which you've all had a ball saying shit like "He's a straight talker! We love that he said this woman had blood pouring out of every hole! So what he said he'd be dating Ivanka if she wasn't his daughter?! He's right to believe the Russians over our intelligence agencies! He's right, Kamala Harris is not American! There's nothing wrong with wanting to delay the election! Just shoot all those protesters!" etc, will come back to haunt you. Every time you open your mouths to whine, there'll be 4 years' worth of your garbage to shut you up.

P.S. Scott Baio and Kristy Swanson still get work, albeit in faith based movies for the evangelical crowd. They recently finished shooting a family comedy. Coming soon to Betamax.

Jeff Boice said...

Maybe the nominees should all collaborate and record the exact same speech- they can all start with "Oh my God, I can't believe this" and finish by telling the same joke. That would teach the Academy, and hearing the same speech 20 times would make for a fun broadcast.

Anonymous said...

@Troy
No anonymous is not my real name, but that is not important.
Like so many, you just feel that whatever the issue is -it's Orange Man Bad and that justifies anything and everything. rioting, looting, whatever.
The issue is whether you supported Trump then or now but you can't get work in Hollywood, how is that any different from he blacklist fo the 1950's?
Personally I don't see it. it was wrong then and its wrong now. What am I missing?

BTW before you go into another Orange Man Bad screed, I did not vote for him in 2016 and don't plan on voting for him in 2020.

Fed by the muse said...

Ken, what do you think of the large number of Emmy award categories these days? Wouldn't be surprised if 'Outstanding Achievement in Set Catering' has actually been proposed/considered. Also, would think the expanded number of nominees in a given category makes the award seem less special than in the years when there were only five in some cases three, nominees. Do you agree?

Troy McClure said...

"Orange man bad"

Yeah, that's the only thing you Trump supporters can ever say in response. Anything that requires an actual coherent and cogent argument is beyond your capabilities. And if you're not a Trump voter, I'm Natalie Wood.

By the way, my comment about anonymous being your real name was a joke that anyone with a basic grasp of sardonic humor would understand. So that rules out Trump supporters, whose idea of wit is wearing t-shirts that say "Grab em by the pussy."

I won't respond any further out of respect for Ken's wish to keep the blog free of ongoing arguments.

Viscount Manzeppi said...

Hollywoodaholic said...
Completely random; maybe a Friday question, but why all the love for the 'sit-com' "Fawlty Towers" like it's some kind of 12-episode masterpiece? John Cleese's Basil is, admittedly, a great character, and boy does he sell the physical humor and put out the energy. But seeing it again recently, it's just not terribly clever OR funny. An episode of "Frasier," any episode, probably has more laughs. Sure, multiple writing staffs make a difference versus just Cleese and Connie Booth on FT, but I just expected something more with the reputation. What's your take?

I always ask the same thing about "Are You Being Served?"