Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Some last minute Thanksgiving thoughts

I bet Ann Curry is thrilled she doesn’t have to get up and host the Macy’s Parade.

To all the people who have been in line at Best Buy since Tuesday waiting for Black Friday. Even if you save $500 you are still an idiot.

Thanksgiving marathons used to be a big treat but now there are marathons on TV channels every day. Is there really that much demand to see SISTER SISTER repeats?

THE MINDY PROJECT should be really thankful. They’ve got a full season’s order despite their ratings dropping like a stone.

Why are the Cowboys America’s team?

Okay, I’ll admit it – I love “Merry Christmas Darling” by the Carpenters.

If turkey is so great how come we never order it any other day of the year?

If you’re in New York, the real fun of the parade is watching them blow up the balloons tonight. They do it near the Natural History Museum.

I miss Underdog.

Everyone says turkey makes you drowsy because of the L-tryptophans. It’s a myth. L-tryptophans only work on an empty stomach and even then only slightly. You’ll feel much drowsier watching THE MASTER. The real reason people feel sluggish after a big turkey dinner is because they ate too much and their digestive system is going nuts trying to process it all.

I notice my neighborhood Chinese restaurant is closed for Thanksgiving. Unlike Christmas, Jews don’t go out.

It’s going to be sunny for the Macy’s Parade. But cold. Those Broadway dancers will be freezing their lip syncing asses off.

Have you noticed that airfares this holiday season are way up from last year? Is it because oil prices are up (although they’re now coming down) or just because “they can?”

Stupidest Thanksgiving song ever: “Turkey Lurky” from PROMISES PROMISES.

I love Thanksgiving because it’s the start of the holiday season that now lasts until Superbowl Sunday.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.


Pat Reeder said...

How dare you?! "Turkey Lurky" is my favorite song of all time!

It actually isn't, but I knew somebody would say that, and I just wanted to be the first.

Happy Thanksgiving!

PS - I also miss Underdog. I generally miss the days when the balloons were all famous cartoon characters and not corporate mascots.

VW: "Earityn" - The new pill to protect your ears from irritants, like the cockatoo that's screaming into mine right now. Take two Earityn pills and place one in each ear for fast-acting relief.

XJill said...

I'm thankful for your dig at The Master.

I only know Turkey Lurkey from the cult classic "Camp" and it always made me wonder it what context it was in the show...

Happy Thanksgiving All!

Mitchell Hundred said...

Yeah, I'm just going to confess that I slept through about 15 minutes of The Master. It was towards the end, and I hadn't gotten as much sleep as I would've liked the night before, but still.

Robert Publicover said...

Ken, they don't blow up the parade balloons. They inflate them. Terrorists blow up balloons!

Cap'n Bob said...

Did you hear about the terrorist who was told to blow up a car and burned his lips on the tailpipe? Badda-bing, badda-boom!

WV: Ofodied. Poor Ofo, I didn't even know he was sick.

Jacob said...

I love turkey. Eat it all the time. A lot of people I know do. Maybe not several decades back when you were raised, but we try to eat healthier now.

Who the hell is Underdog?

Lorimartian said...

"Jacob said... Who the hell is Underdog?"

LOL, no offense Jacob. Underdog was a cartoon series featuring a dog fighting for truth, justice, and the American way. If I remember correctly, I think his catch phrase was "Have no fear, Underdog is here." Cute and clever. Before your time, I guess.

Ralph C. said...

The marathon I loved was the one Comedy Central did for my favorite show, Mystery Science Theater 3000. It was called the Turkey Day Marathon. Filling up on MST3K did make one tuckered out...from all the laughing!

Happy Thanksgiving and stuff(ing)!

LouOCNY said...

Actually the Official Party Season starts with Halloween, and then ends with Super Bowl Sunday. A group of us used to have a party at Halloween, then a friends Thanksgiving the weekend before, so everyone could get together with their families on the holidays. Then Christmas....New Years and then the SB. We gave up trying to think of an excuse for a Martin Luther King Day party..

Happy Thanksgiving all!

LouOCNY said...

And don't forget - 'You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant' - excepting Alice!

Embed this perhaps, Ken?

Francis Rafferty said...

Is this list a sly tribute to 'Hank's Thoughts'?

Eric Weinstein said...

I, too, am a big fan of the Carpenters' holiday songs, and think "Merry Christmas Darling" is a prime illustration of the purity of Karen's vocals...except I don't think she enjoyed Thanksgiving.

gottacook said...

Seriously, the Carpenters' Christmas song? The one with the couplet "Logs on the fire / fill me with desire"? (Lyrics by, according to Wikipedia, Frank Pooler, written some years earlier when he was 18, which perhaps excuses this; music by Richard Carpenter)

bevo said...

"Why are the Cowboys America’s team?"

Lack of a strong male figure in the household.

Anonymous said...

Actually, Underdog said, "There's no need to fear! Underdog is here!"

Loved that cartoon.

Pam aka sisterzip

Matt Patton said...

About Turkey Lurkey:

It's actually a stupid Christmas song, and it's context in Promises, Promises is a big Christmas party at the insurance company when the hero, Chuck Baxter, works.

The lyrics are brainless, but the melody, like a lot of things written by Burt Bacharach, is tricky. When I was in 5th grade, I was in the school chorus and we had to sing a simplified arrangement of this ditty. It took us several rehearsals to get it right.

In the show, the song was originally meant as a showcase for the dancers in the chorus and the choreographer, Michael Bennett. They were impressive enough that you forget how stupid the actual song is.

About Underdog:

Most of the time he was in disguise as Shoe-Shine Boy, who was humble and loveable. He was forever saving Polly Purebred, Girl Reporter. The villain, whose name I can't remember, looked like a wolf. Underdog was voiced by Wally Cox, and the villain by a character actor named George Irving, who was also the show's narrator. It was a lot of fun. Maybe if some kind soul takes a giant razor blade to the Pokemon balloons in the next 12 months, they'll bring Underdog back . . .

Greg Ehrbar said...

After watching the Macy's parade yesterday, it seems that Matt Lauer's least favorite song is "S. Marvelous."

But probably it's Ann Curry new favorite song. Bet she hummed it while doing a cooking segment at home.

Ruth said...

I was excited to watch Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade yesterday since last year my DVR didn’t have enough available memory to record the whole thing. Since I offered to host our family’s Thanksgiving dinner this year I knew I wouldn’t be able to watch the parade live, so I’m happy that I took one of my DISH coworker’s advice and got a DISH Hopper. The 2TB hard drive has more than enough space recording space, and when I finally got around to watching the parade last night around midnight I was pleasantly surprised to see Papa Smurf and Hello Kitty.