Saturday, May 20, 2006

American Graffiti Idol

Traveling home this weekend. Will probably be jet lagged till August. Thanks again to HH for being my blogmaster.

With the big AMERICAN IDOL finale upon us, the question is posed: at what point does fanatic interest become pathetic obsession? I contend it’s when you pick up that phone and actually vote. That’s when you’ve crossed over to the dark side. But for those like me, who love the show but just can’t bring themselves to take that dangerous step, here’s a little AMERICAN IDOL nostalgia to get you through the weekend – healthily. My observations of the first IDOL finale.

What was with Kelly Clarkson wearing a black schmatah dress OVER jeans?? It's bad enough her music video looked like a Summer's Eve commercial.

Somebody reeeeeally gay dressed the boys.

Who had less to do, the twenty non finalists who basically stood around and were window dressing...or Brian Dunkleman?

I love when Dunkleman said "see you early next year" when all reports say he's gone.

Did any of the girls eat for the last three weeks?

Did all of the girls get their navels pierced over the last three weeks?

Justin wore more make up than Mary Tyler Moore does these days.

In the 60's medley (which they've now done a gazillion times) did you notice that everyone but that horrible Jim got a solo?

Best body: Ryan Starr. She looked hot even when behind the stairs (what a great bit of choreography THAT was).

Ryan Seacrest is gay. I don't care that he slept with Paula Abdul. That just makes him more gay.

Did Kelly go to Debra Messing's hair stylist? Or a Vidal Sassoon trainee?

The country medley was riotous. Thirty Osmonds "gettin' down y'all"!

Who will be the first American Idol finalist to take a gig at a bar mitzvah?

Who will be the first American Idol finalist to wind up the subject of a tragic "E! True Hollywood Story"? Dunkleman doesn't count. He's a given. Today's Lauren Chapin. .

Tamyra Grey has the longest arms in America. I mean, like Inspector Gadget.

The fifteen minutes are ticking.....


Anonymous said...

Seacrest is as gay as a football bat.

LTM said...

He's not gay... watch, some day he'll be married to a nice woman like Nicole Kidman or Katie Holmes.

Anonymous said...


MaryAn Batchellor said...

Haven't watched since Chris went home. Not bitter, but American Idol is dead to me.

ltm said...

20 bucks says I get sued by Scientology for that.


Did all of the girls get their navels pierced over the last three weeks?
It's called a "WHORE HOLE" down here, in "God's Waiting Room" by the retired ladies.
(These aren't your gran'ma's pensioner's, either, I should add.)

Anonymous said...

Saw Dunkelman performing stand up on Melrose...he ain't bad.

- Allen

Anonymous said...

I don't think Ryan's gay he is just a heavy metrosexual.

Simon on the other hand really does act like a self hating homosexual.

ltm said...

Seacrest... out

Well, maybe in a few years. Seriously though, who would use that as their sign-off... even if they are named Seacrest?