Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Thank God for the internet! Otherwise, how could we keep up with the minute to minute updates on Mariah Carey’s pregnancy? Can I ask a question?
Who the fuck cares?!
I can’t open a news page without some new screaming headline regarding Mariah Carey’s motherly way. She’s having contractions! EXTRA EXTRA! She’s been admitted to the hospital! BULLETIN! She’s not having contractions! OH NO!! She’s been released from the hospital.
Currently we’re at that stage where expert analysts discuss the difference between contractions and indigestion.
There are a million photos of Mariah’s extended belly. Some even taken during her pregnancy.
We know they will be twins, one boy and one girl. I’m sure her sonograms can be found on line. I would not be surprised if there was a webcam inserted right up the delivery canal. And maybe Mary Hart.
What’s the big deal? If Charlie Sheen were pregnant I wouldn’t expect this much coverage. This isn’t the holy Madonna, this isn’t even the trashy Madonna. There’s no “first” here. Women have been delivering children the exact same way long before "Dream Lover" ever became a hit.
Obviously, a lot of people do care. Otherwise, Mariah wouldn’t get this amount of attention. I just don’t know who those people are, or why? Mariah tries to downplay it. She’s not looking for publicity she claims. And then she goes and body paints her stomach – an obvious ploy for attention.
I wish her, her family, and her new babies all the good health and happiness in the world. It’s just that, when it comes to Mariah Carey’s reproduction endeavors, my curiosity and need to watch does not extend all the way till the blessed birth of her twins. It ends one second after conception.
By Ken Levine at 5:52 AM