Wrapping up this year's Summer Movies Preview. Most of these will come out in August and you know Hollywood only saves the best for Labor Day. Meanwhile, the M's wrap up a three-game series with the Tigers and I'll have the call on 710 ESPN Seattle, the Mariners Radio Network, Sirius/XM satellite, and MLB.COM.
G.I. JOE: RETALIATION – Bruce Willis will now star in any film that still allows him to be an action hero. Get a couple of your friends together, buy an M-16 and Bruce will come to your clubhouse and be in your home movie.
NEIL YOUNG’S JOURNEYS – “Follow the Cocaine Brick Road.”
ICE AGE: CONTINENTAL DRIFT – Cartoon animals stake out territory not yet tread by the MADAGASCAR cartoon animals.
TED – Mark Wahlberg’s teddy bear comes to life and ruins his life. Directed by Seth MacFarlane so it’s FAMILY GUY meets ALF meets THE BEAVER. Co-stars Mila Kunis so who cares if it’s funny?
RUBY SPARKS – From the people who brought you the wonderful LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE. Writer creates fantasy girl who appears to come to life. Similar to TED except she says “I love you” instead of “Go fuck yourself.”
KATY PERRY: PART OF ME – It all depends on which part.
HOPE SPRINGS – Like all couples who have been married for 30+ years, Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones clash over amount of Oscars.
TOTAL RECALL – Colin Farrell continues his bid to become California governor by starring in this Sci-Fi remake.
THE CAMPAIGN – Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis are two candidates who rip the shit out of each other. If it’s half as funny as this year’s Republican primaries it will be the laugh riot of the summer.
THE EXPENDABLES 2 -- Stars every over-the-hill actor star from Bruce Willis (of course) to Sly Stallone to Auh-nold. CACCOON with fight scenes.