Tuesday, October 13, 2015
I want my own TV show!
But with the internet and fandom, writers are beginning to step into the limelight. (If only we were better looking.)
Larry Wilmore went from creating THE BERNIE MAC show to his own show on Comedy Central.
EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND showrunner, Phil Rosenthal is going to have a “world hopping food series” on PBS.
And now Dan Harmon from COMMUNITY is hosting a TV pilot for IFC.
So where is my TV series? I enjoyed my 1.5 minutes of fame hosting movies on TCM, and 2.6 seconds of fame as a commentator for THE SEVENTIES documentary series on CNN -- now I’m ready to hit the big time. I’m ready to branch out into my own series.
I’m waiting by the phone. I’m set to go.
Okay, there is the small issue of just what would the show be about? But that’s details. The main thing is you’d have ME. You’d have my brand. What is my brand? Again – details.
I could host a talk show, a game show, do sketch-variety, travel the world, review things, debate politicians and idiots, give cooking and surfing tips, star in a sitcom, makeover homes, host a kids show, sell Marie Osmond dolls on QVC, host a fitness show, or do whatever it is that Kelly Rippa does.
I’m still waiting by the phone.
All I need is a break. Sure, I could go the traditional route – do a sex tape that goes viral, but in as much as I have integrity (and Lizzy Caplan said no) I choose to take the high road and just shamelessly beg.
Producers and networks can also email me. They don’t have to call.
I’m getting a little worried because who knows how long this window will remain open? In another year maybe non-writing producers will get their own shows. They’ve infringed on our off-camera careers, why not this too? So I need my own show SOON.
And to sweeten the pot, I own several sports jackets and have an anti-glare treatment on my glasses.
I'm a natural!
Let’s get me on television while there still is television. Thank you.
There must be something wrong with the phone. It’s just not ringing.