And this happens more than you think. Often times networks have agendas and the purpose of their notes is to steer you in the direction of those agendas.
Case in point: A project David and I once had at Fox. Now I should point out that this was several years ago and they’ve gone through eight or nine regimes and two or three ownership changes since then. So the policy back then is not necessarily the policy they follow today (although I suspect it is).
Our pilot was an upscale workplace comedy featuring three really bright young men. I mean, Aaron Sorkin bright. The network really liked the first draft and had minimal notes. One was, could we do a scene in a restaurant or bar? Just someplace away from their office. Fair enough. We asked if we could adjust one of the scenes we already had and just move it to a bar, and they were fine with that.
Now this threw us a little. I asked, “To do what?”
And this was their answer:
“We don’t care. We just want a hot babe in the show”.
We busted out laughing. What else could we do???
Now they could have said, “We feel it would provide balance” or “it would be nice to have a woman’s perspective in this show” but we all knew that was bullshit. They just wanted tits! This was Fox. On a creative level this addition made no sense, but hey, I applaud their honesty.
Eventually they passed on the show, felt it was too sophisticated and more of an NBC series than Fox. On the other hand, there was one character they really loved. Guess which one.
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One reason I believe "Charlie's Angels" lasted more than one season past Farrah Fawcett-Majors (yeah, I'm including her married surname when she was wed to Lee "Six Million Dollar Man" Majors) departure was because Jaclyn Smith and newbie Cheryl Ladd was still enough to attract all the red-blooded male viewers wanting to see them in bikinis in every subsequent episode!
Friday Question(s)....
During your time at M*A*S*H, did weather ever play havoc with shooting at the ranch? If so, did scenes ever get relocated from the ranch back to the studio?
Also, other than the bonfire in season six's "War of Nerves", did you ever shoot at the ranch at night?
@ Tavm:
"There's been a murder, Angels. At the health spa." Sort of a Simpsons reference, but all those plots were alike.
Talking of hot babes, I hope you'll be reviewing Wonder Woman 1984. Gal Gadot is a turbo hot babe.
Ken,
I remember that you would take improv classes a few years back. Have you tried any since the shutdown? How were they better (or worse)?
I hate to admit it, but the "babe factor" has always played a big part in choosing the shows I watch. Especially with mediocre and/or borderline shows. That's why I started watching "Friends" way back when. I had seen Jennifer Aniston on the sketch comedy "The Edge." I thought she was cute. So when "Friends" debuted I figured I'd watch. In that case however, it turned out to be a pretty good show.
There have been times where "We just want a hot babe in the show" was the obvious reason a cast member was added to a show. One good example of this was "7 of 9" on "Star Trek Voyager." And of course they had to put her in that skintight outfit. Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against Jeri Ryan, yet her physical appearance seems to have been the primary reason for casting her.
But to be fair, no doubt there are TV execs saying, "We need a hunky guy," too.
M.B.
>>> And this was their answer: "We don’t care. We just want a hot babe in the show”.<<<
So here's my question, since you and David are incredibly crearive guys and know the Hollywood/TV territory, might there have been a way to bring a hot babe into it and make it work? I have seen plenty of your posts where you overcame adversity, so wouldn't something like this qualify the same?
Keep waiting for somebody to write a book titled NUTTY NETWORK NOTES. Trouble is, it could be the size of a phone book (remember them?). Might have to be published in Volumes. But it would definitely be a comedy--although in some cases, it might sound like science fiction.
My partner and I worked with NBC to develop a pilot about two sisters--one quite conservative; the other, quite liberal; about everything, including sex. The Development VP said they wanted the series to be an adult show--the sisters would talk about everything, including things like virginity, their periods, etc. A "water cooler show"--something that would be a subject of conversation the next day around the water cooler--as in "Did you see that show on NBC last night? How did they get away with that stuff?"
My partner and I were encouraged. We wrote a treatment, turned it in, and heard back that Brandon (Tartikoff, President) read it and had only one note. One note? Now we were more than encouraged, we were excited. So we went in to meet on the one note. The one Network note was, "Can you make 'em witches?" My immediate thought was 'We must be on Candid Camera.' But the note continued, and I swear this is true. "And one witch is a good witch and one is a bad witch. And we even have a title for you: 'Which Witch is Which?'"
When we stopped laughing and when we realized they were serious, my partner got up and walked out. We suggested they find other writers. Maybe check with Elizabeth Montgomery for recommendations. They asked us to think about it and called us back in two weeks to see if we would change our minds. We didn't.
Jay Moriarty:
The book you're describing was put together by Leonard Stern back in the '90s (or thereabouts).
The title: A Martian Wouldn't Say That.
It's a little book (in size, at least); I had a copy when it first came out, but lost it in a move.
It's long since out of print, and I've been trying to find another copy, but rarity has driven the price sky-high; I'm still looking ...
By the way, the title is a real note that someone at CBS gave to the producers of My Favorite Martian, early in that show's run; Ray Walston used to tell that story a lot, wincing at the thought.
Ken, why couldn't you have made one of the "really bright guys" an attractive woman (a term I vastly prefer to the patronizing "hot babe")? Give her a Berkeley PhD or something like that; I can't imagine a gender change would have altered the series to a noticeable degree.
Then again, if those Fox TV honchos were anything like their Fox News Channel counterparts, the very idea of a bright woman would be considered subversive (unless she was a buxom conservative blonde with good legs).
Re Mike Doran's comment, does anyone know what it was that CBS thought a Martian wouldn't say?
Re. Charlie's Angels
My writing partner, Mike Milligan, and I were meeting with Aaron Spelling at his house when the doorbell rang and Aaron's butler entered with the new edition of TIME magazine. On the cover were Charlie's Angels, the stars of Spelling's newest hit series.
The article inside mentioned that the show's producers made every effort to put the stars in sexy attire such as bikinis, cocktail dresses, etc. Aaron explained this by saying, "I grew up in Texas. My father was a tailor. A guy comes to my father and says, 'Make me a green suit,' my father doesn't say 'You know, you'd look much better in brown or blue.' If a man wants a green suit, my father gives him a green suit. If the network wants T&A, I give 'em what they want."
Working with both Aaaron and Norman Lear, both legendary producers, Mike and I noticed a similar charismatic aura of success and self-assurance surrounding each man. But where Aaron Spelling, by his own admission, gives people what they want; Norman Lear, with a sense of responsibility, gives people what he thinks they need. The difference is monumental.
Coming to this a little late... but that's Xmas...
A few years ago, I had a pilot commissioned by a UK network. The world was very male. After the first draft, why loved it, but the (female) head of drama felt it was too male for their mostly female audience. Could I do anything about that? So I did, and found a way to address the note while keeping it the same show. The HOD was happy, it went to her boss for the final green light. He passed saying it was too female. History does not record how she responded to his comment. But I suspect it wasn't to say that was her fault and we have a less female version to hand.
Funnily enough, a few years later, the same network had a series set in the same world but entirely focused on the women in that world...
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