Currently, the Russian Tea Room is being boycotted because of Russia’s current unprovoked invasion of Ukraine. And although boycotting is a (sometimes… occasionally… maybe once) effective American way of protesting I have my doubts it will force Putin into declaring a ceasefire. My guess is the subject of the Russian Tea Room has not once entered the Situation Room during this crisis, except for maybe take-out.
Also, it should be noted — the Russian Tea Room is not owned by Russians.
I’m sure, if it weren’t a Central Park South institution they’d just rename it “Ted’s Baltic Diner” and boycotters would happily return for “Mama’s Famous Beet Soup” formerly “borscht.”
Although it has been made quite public that Russians do not own the Russian Tea Room, some boycotting still persists. Why let facts get in the way, am I right?
So for those still hell-bent on bringing Russia to its knees by withholding our American dollars (Official measurement: One U.S. dollar is now worth enough rubles to fill the Guggenheim), here are some other related targets for your withholding pleasure:
Russian Dolls — Children love these wooden dolls of decreasing size placed one inside the other. But don’t be fooled! These dolls are making a statement. Each larger doll consumes the smaller ones. What six-year-old girl is going to play with these dolls and not see the parallel to world domination? Barbie may have accessories that get lost under the bed, but at least she’s not trying to dominate Ken or Skipper.
“Russian Dolls” — The Netflix limited series. Okay, follow me on this one. It was co-created by Amy Poehler who also directed the recent documentary “Lucy and Desi,” which touched upon Lucy maybe being a Communist. Also, it was hard to follow the “Russian Dolls” time loop narrative. I mean, was she really dead or not dead? How did this happen? Better to watch “The Andy Griffith Show.”
“War & Peace” — Classic Russian novel. This one is easy. You’ve avoided it your whole life.
Russian Dressing — They’ve meddled with our elections, they’ve hacked into our computers, and now they’re infiltrating our sacred condiments. Do you know how many calories are in Russian Dressing? You think you’re eating a healthy salad, but no, you’re chugging a ShackBurger. Way healthier is Thousand Island Dressing or Louie Dressing.
Russian Roulette — This might be a tough one because who doesn’t love to play this fun game of chance? I’d say think of the overall consequences except people who do play Russian Roulette give little thought to consequences. So just trust me. There’s a five-in-six chance I’m right.
Or… you could donate money, time, or supplies to this heartbreaking cause. There are many ways we all can really help. Let’s focus on those. Hey, how about a fundraiser at the Russian Tea Room?
43 comments :
It's clear you don't watch Late Night talk shows -
All of the ones that I have seen recently have made their own lists -
there's only so many Russian Doll jokes you can make.
PS: You realize that in 50 years time your comments today will be considered totally racist by the early 20's.
I loved watching everyone on the news pouring out non-Russian vodka recently. Can't fix stupid.
Anybody remember Freedom Fries when French leaders had the brains to disagree with the Bush administration provoking an unnecessary war with Iraq?
I've been boycotting Boney M since 1978:
Rah rah Rasputin lover of the Russian Queen
There was a cat that really was gone
Rah rah Rasputin Russia's greatest love machine
It was a shame how he carried on
Well said. Already orchestras are cancelling Tchaikovsky, Russian restaurants are getting threats, and Americans are doing all the silly, destructive things they did to Germans in 1917 and anybody who "looked Middle Eastern" after 9/11. It's our thing. And according to Orlando Figes's wonderful history of Russia, nesting dolls originated in China.
I ate at the Russian Tea Room once. The food was meh but the decor was amazing. Do they still keep Christmas decorations up all year?
Read Gogol. He was Ukrainian and he's a lot more fun than Tolstoy.
Boycott boycotts. As Ken noted above, they are typically misguided and misdirected.
I went to see jazz pianist Lisa Hilton at Carnegie Hall (Weill Recital Hall) a few years ago and decided to try the Russian Tea Room. I was seated at a booth, and was given a glass of water and a menu. I drank a little water before noticing I didn't like anything on the menu. So, I left and went to an Italian place. At least I can say I've been to the Russian Tea Room.
Yeah, stupid over reactions by people who want to pretend to care without actually doing anything positive.
Do Americans still order a "burger and freedom fries"?
N., I'm in the process of watching most of the videos on the David Letterman archive YouTube channel. That's the only late night I watch these days, unless there's an interview that grabs my attention. Sometimes, Dave's channel has new material. It's mostly surviving staff members discussing their favorite moments, but sometimes, we hear from Dave himself (bearded, of course). Today, he and Barbara Gaines went through photos on his iPad.
This just in: the stuntpersons' union and Cirque du Soleil have announced that they will no longer use the Russian swing. Other circuses and acrobatic troupes are expected to join the boycott.
Due to our heroes' continued association and possible collusion with Russian spies, I hereby resign from the Bullwinkle Fan Club.
I'm in boycott mode, I will walk slowly. No more russian to places....
.
Russian River. No diving or snorkeling for a month.
I'm boycotting the band Rush AND Sia. Too close for comfort.
I actually gave myself the project of listening to the 48 hours or so of the audiobook of War & Peace this year. I'm almost halfway through and it's fascinating how much of the character of the Russian people and the senselessness of war hasn't changed since Tolstoy wrote it.
In 2019, Audible, the audiobook folks, recorded a reunion show of the British 1970s comedy show "The Goodies", which was intended to result in a new series of the show. It featured the three original Goodies as heroes and Joanna Lumley as "herself" as a Russian agent whom nobody believed would be a Russian agent. She kept talking about how she wanted to make a smaller Big Ben inside the original, and then another one smaller than that, etc. She also got Parliament to agree to give Kent to Vladimir Putin. Events overtook the project, unfortunately; Tim Brooke-Taylor, one of the Goodies, died of Covid. And, far more happily, the running joke about "Dame Joanna Lumley" not being a dame was overtaken by her inclusion in this year's New Year's Honours List.
BRAVO!! Much needed witty humor!!
Isn't there a Russian T Room in Hollywood? Used to go to lunch there occasionally. And a Russian restaurant in North Hollywood? Had dinner there once with A Russian client, Children's Fund auto donation campaign, which was for the huge, Russian, Jewish orthodox, temple in West Hollywood, where I was Bar Mitzvah'd at age 60.
Someone already made the reference—the owners (to make a funny point) should announce they’re temporarily renaming it yhe Freedom Tea Room.
According to Wikipedia, the Russian Tea Room was founded by former members of the Russian Imperial Ballet as a gathering place for expatriates. But it's had a number of other owners over the years -- interestingly, in 2002, the estate of Warner LeRoy (the restaurateur and Warner Bros. family member) sold it to the United States Golf Association, which had intended to turn it into a golf museum.
I suspect a boycott of the Russian Tea Room is more a CNN fantasy than a real thing. Obviously it would be silly and irrelevant to turn one's back on the Russian (in name only) Tea Room because of Russia's invasion of Ukraine, but I am generally pro-boycott.
It doesn't matter to me that my swearing off Russian vodka or a certain beer or a brand of beans won't affect world events, I do it because I think it is the right thing to do. It isn't much, but it's all the power most of us have to register our disapproval. But if I were in New York right now, I'd make a point of dining at the Russian Tea Room. Later, it would be off to a deli for a Reuben schmeared with Russian dressing.
The denizens of the land of Freedom Fries have no clue. Americans are the dumbest of the dumb.
Perfect example of the depth of dumb is the death threats and harassment directed at the real life actress who played Skyler on Breaking Bad. The trolls thought her character was real and they didn't like how she was mean to Walt.
I'll do my part. I for one will NOT be going to Branson, Missouri to see Yakov Smirnoff.
I will also not watch the episode of "Frasier" where Martin takes his Russian, bear-clock to the "Antiques Roadshow."
I won't take an inner tube down the Russian River. (In northern California)
Speaking of "Smirnoff" the vodka of the same name is made in America, so it's O.K. Unfortunately, it's a little to early to start drinking.
M.B.
I can see Down With Boris Badenov. But, must we bounce the fetching Natasha, too? Fine. One bad, all bad. We can paint the enemy as such during times of military exercise.
We also must boycott Nikolaevna Zacharenko while we’re at it. Burn all images!
(Shhhhh, please, no one tells Ken who that is).
Republicans won't boycott Russia, given their rationale is to oppose everything a Democrat president does or stands for, and of course the fact that the obese depends wearer is in Putin's pocket.
Someone should tell Magda Taylor Greene and Eva Boebert that President Biden is going to ban the playing of Russian roulette. Hopefully that would make them play it in protest.
I have partial Ukrainian heritage, and these last few weeks have been hellish for me. I've seen the images of the country getting bombed up, and I can't help but take it personally.
What makes it worse is that I know I have relatives in Ukraine, but I have no idea who or where they are. (My Ukrainian grandmother was a staunch anti-Soviet living in New York during the Cold War, and she cut off all contact with them because of America's political sentiment at the time. I'd have to take one of those Ancestry.com kits to identify and locate them.) If I knew that I had the names of some relatives in one of the devastated sections of Kyiv, the city my great-grandfather's family emigrated from, I'd be worried sick.
So right now I'm having a hard time liking anything Russian. This is a Putin thing, not a Russian people or culture thing, and I'm not holding it against the Russians I meet or have met (when I danced Argentine tango socially years ago, many of my best partners were Russian women). But I can't eat that country's foods or drink its vodka or watch its ballets at the moment, and I can't bring myself to visit the small Russian grocery store a block from me. It's just too much right now, and I'm still too raw.
No accounting for stupid. My fathers parents were born in Russia in the late 1800's and came here in 1900 or 1901. The Russian people are not responsible for Putin. I hope people here realize how many Russians are getting arrested for protesting. This is such a stupid country.
On lighter notes ...
-- "French" fries aren't French; they're actually Belgian. The term "French fries" is actually a mishearing of "frenched fries". In the culinary world, "to french" means to cut something up in very thin spears, similar to julienned carrots. So "frenched fries" means a potato that's been sliced into small spears and then fried in a vat of oil.
The Belgians perfected this with their "pommes frites". They double-fry the sliced potatoes (fry them in a vat, let them rest until cool, fry them again in another vat), and they serve them with your choice of as many as two dozen different types of seasonings and/or sauces (usually flavored mayonnaise).
-- @Breadbaker: I need to download that Audible book of The Goodies. I discovered their TV show on YouTube and Dailymotion, and I hadn't laughed so hard at a half-hour show as I did to their "Kitten Kong" episode. I remember seeing them on TV when visiting Canada in the '70s, I wish they had a bigger impact stateside.
If I was them, for a short period of time I would rename it the Ukraine Tea Room.
And your idea of hosting a fundraising event is great.
This is the perfect time to abandon the overused term "iconic."
Speaking of Freedom Fries, the Quebec diner where poutine was invented is now calling it "potatoes-cheese-gravy." (The original name derived from "pudding.")
Amazing to me the comments criticizing the US for being stupid. At least we had the brains to get rid of our dictator wannabe. Can you say the same for Russia right now?
Well done, Ken. Boycotting the Russian Tea Room is jaw droppingly stupid. And, well... I was always more partial to the Polish Tea Room in the Hotel Edison (only 45 seconds from Broadway), but, alas, it has closed. They had the best matzo brei in the Jewish universe.
Ken - Have you done a review of "The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel"? I have been enjoying the latest season.
Only 1.2% of U.S. vodka imports come from Russia, according to data from the Distilled Spirits Council of the United States for the first half of 2021.
Yeah, I hate dumb-ass boycotts that are not based on facts.
When directing an episode for television have you ever used a take that you knew contained a mistake, or goof? ( I just watched the 'Bupkis' episode from the Dick Van Dyke show where Rob opens a phone book after having already dialed the number. It appears that he and the studio audience noticed the error but they kept it anyway.)
When directing an episode for television have you ever used a take that you knew contained a mistake, or goof? (The reason I ask is that I just saw the DICK VAN DYKE SHOW episode 'Bupkis'. Rob opens the phone book looking for a number after having already dialed the number. Both the studio audience and Van Dyke seemed to notice the mistake but nonetheless they used that take.)
My younger sister visited me when I was living in NYC and she really wanted to go to the Russian Tea Room and see some celebrities. I could tell as soon as we were seated we were in the "Siberia" tier for lowly tourists all packed in tightly, crowded and noisy. But my sister started imagining she was seeing some famous people and excitedly pointing them out and I humored her. She still remembers it as a high point of that trip. I mainly remember the blini and golden caviar which was pretty good.
There's also 'Baby Fat' in which Rob, upset with Alan Brady, mumbles an off-hand comment while eye level with a German Shepherd. The dog responds with a big yawn in Dick Van Dyke's face. DVD goes with it and the studio audience loves it. In 'Coast To Coast Big Mouth', Carl Reiner, as Alan Brady, pounds his desk and knocks a phone receiver by mistake. Reiner holds the receiver to his mouth and growls into it. Hysterical. Oddest goof in TDVDS occurs in 'The Sam Pomerantz Scandals' when an enthusiastic Rose Marie enters a scene and shouts. "Hi, Mare!" to Laura. "Mare" as in "Mary" Tyler Moore. Moore glances off camera waiting for a Director's "Cut!" which never comes.
There is an episode of Frasier which has a moment which I've always wondered about as to whether it's a mistake which was left in. In 'Junior Agent', Kristin Chenoweth plays a plucky "mouse type" who wants to be Frasier's new representative. At one point, she barges into a mens locker room. Frasier and the radio station Program Manager, Kenny, are wearing only towels. Kristen grabs Kenny's pants and ends up exiting the set with them. Kelsey Grammar reacts with a seemingly surprised, "She took your pants." It seems to be a blooper. That Kristin wasn't suppose to walk off with the pants. It does provide an extra, somewhat awkward, yet funny moment. I still wonder if this was a mistake which was left in.
I've always enjoyed David Letterman but there's something about his beardy image that freaks me out. To paraphrase Niles on Frasier, it's given birth to a new phobia for me: pogonophobia, the fear of beards.
Any who, like Liggie, enjoy The Goodies might well enjoy vintage British radio comedy sketch show I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again whose cast included all three future Goodies and Joh Cleese, among others.
Tim Brooke-Taylor and Graeme Carden were also long-standing panellists on long-running (as in from the early seventies and still going) comedy panel show I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue although be warned. I'm sure there are plenty episodes of both on Youtube.
I will do my part by refusing to listen to any more music by Patrice Rushen!
(For those of you wondering: I am indeed here all week. And beyond. Be very afraid.)
Two things. First off: "a Central Park South institution"? Does THIS look like "Central Park South"?
https://tinyurl.com/35vu2kf5
Secondly, I am not taking any chances. I am working with the world's most talented hackers to remove every video clip online of me in an opulently-designed waiter's costume, pouring wine for patrons of the Russian Tea Room while Michelle Williams and Peter Scolari (R.I.P... one of my favorite actors ever!) have a somewhat unpleasant meeting there in the series "Fosse/Verdon"!
Gotta say: "gaudy" pretty much covers the joint.
The RTR is on W. 57th, near Carnegie Hall, not CPW.
I only went once, back in the late 70s, when it was more of a thing, and had the Chicken Kiev. And loved it.
The music of Prokofiev is also allowed. He was Ukrainian.
The irony of Tchaikovsky being cancelled is too much. I can understand the 1812 Overture not being considered appropriate (cannon fire and all). But that work is SO overrated anyway. Tchaikovsky was criticized in his time for being too pro-Western, and not nationalistic enough. Hence his conflict with the "Russian Five."
Now that would make a good sitcom.
"Barbie may have accessories that get lost under the bed, but at least she’s not trying to dominate Ken or Skipper. "
You haven't seen the way my stepdaughter plays with her dolls...
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