Wednesday, June 22, 2022

A network note I respected

One time my writing partner, David Isaacs and I got a network note that we didn’t necessarily agree with.  These were second draft notes on a pilot we had written for Fox.  

The premise was sort of in the DEVIL WEARS PRADA arena.  A hugely successful but terribly intimating media giant queen hires three young bright assistants but plans to only keep two.  So it’s all about competition set in a swank New York skyscraper.  

The note from Fox was this:  Add a hot babe.  I was somewhat thrown by this. “Where?” I asked, “there’s no real organic reason for adding a bombshell to a sophisticated corporate environment.  These people are all Aaron Sorkins.”

They said, “We know.  She doesn’t have to be in the corporation. We don’t care where you put her, but we want a super hot girl in the show?”

“Why?” we asked.

Their answer:  “Because this is Fox.”  

I said, “Okay, I have to applaud you for your honesty.”   

It also ended all push-back.  Clearly this was not an argument we were going to win.  But at least we knew why. 

We decided she would could be the waitress at the first-floor coffee shop, which we had to invent.   We then took one of the scenes between the battling assistants and set it in the coffee shop, bringing the hot waitress over two or three times.  

Fox was happy.  The president didn’t pick up the show ultimately, but they were happy.  

A couple of years later NBC bought the pilot.  (One of my favorite things in the world — getting paid twice for the same script.)   They had one note.  Take out the useless hot waitress and do that scene up in the office building.  

I hate when you get notes with hidden agendas that networks try to cover up by saying they’re artistic concerns.  Fox at least told it like it is.  I have to tell you, it was a lot easier addressing that note when we knew the real reason for it. 

UPDATE:  You can watch the play adaptation of it here:



25 comments :

Andrew said...

My understanding is that the character Elaine was added to Seinfeld because of a network note. Before that the only main female character was going to be a waitress. So at least one time, the network was correct.

bmfc1 said...

And that "hot actress" from the coffee shop is now an anchor on F*x N*ws.

N. Zakharenko said...

Does that mean you both:

a) didn't keep a copy of the earlier Draft (even though you both thought it superior?)

b) figured that NBC would also prefer a "hot girl"?

c) your storage locker can hold only so many versions of a script


PS: As a comedy writer, do you think Colbert did a "what the hell was he thinking" with his "comedy stint" the other day (even with permissions) - slap bang in the midst of the hearings?

It was a gift from the gods for those Conservative media outlets attempting to trivialize the findings.

VincentP said...

Why couldn't the "hot babe" have been someone in the corporation, such as a gorgeous blonde with an honors degree from Berkeley? (After all, attractive, intelligent people do attend public universities.) "Hotness" shouldn't be a stereotype for people without brains.

Leighton said...

I don't suppose it was "The Snobs"? Regardless, you've already covered that pilot in your podcast, I've read. I'll have to find that episode...

Glenn said...

Reminds me a bit of Kevin Bacons film, THE BIG PICTURE. Everyone's got an opinion and the writer has to bend --sometimes.

Anonymous said...

WOKE comment of the day winner, come on down.

Ricardo Pinedo said...

I wager that *that* guy will post his own response here, and then comment on other posts endlessly. Why doesn't the guy take a break.

By Ken Levine said...

VincentP - Uh, there IS that character. Andrea.

Mitch said...

How was having a Tuesday off? As great as it sounds?

maxdebryn said...

Wow. Moosie Drier is a director now ? He used to figure heavily in my TV viewing schedule when I was a kid. I mean, I didn't know *what* programs Moosie would turn up in, but he was always good. He was in the memorable ABC Afterschool Special "Hewitt's Just Different," that also featured Perry Lang (as Hewitt), and Russell Johnson !

maxdebryn said...

Wow. Moosie Drier is a director now ? He used to figure heavily in my TV viewing schedule when I was a kid. I mean, I didn't know *what* programs Moosie would turn up in, but he was always good. He was in the memorable Afterschool Special "Hewitt's Just Different," that also featured Perry Lang (as Hewitt), and Russell Johnson !

maxdebryn said...

Was this the pilot in question ? "True Jackson, VP"


https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1131751/?ref_=nm_flmg_wr_8

Jason Gracey said...

I love how that became part of the plot for them writing a pilot in the show.

Anonymous said...

Wasn't Moosie Drier Howard Borden's son?

Anonymous said...

Moodie was Howard Borden's son.

Mike Bloodworth said...

Speaking of WOKE, today that note would be, Add a transgender or add an Asian lesbian or a handicapped latinX, etc.

Meanwhile, call me a pig if you want to, but the "hot babe" factor has gotten me to watch more shows than I can remember. "Friends" is one example. I had a crush on Jennifer Aniston, so I tuned in and discovered that it was a pretty good show. "The Big Bang Theory" is another example. I knew Johnny Galecki from "Christmas Vacation" and from "Roseanne," but I also remembered Kaley Cuoco from "8 Simple Rules..." Turns out "B.B.T." became one of my favorite shows.
On the other hand it has also gotten me to watch some mediocre sitcoms as well. "I watched "Suddenly Susan" because of Brooke Shields and "Caroline in the City" because of Lea Thompson. I only watched "It's a Living" for Ann Jillian (and for Wendy Schaal when she was a cast member)
Ironically, I rarely watched "Baywatch." I for one am not a fan of bleach blondes with massive, fake boobs. But, considering the popularity of that show I must be in the minority.

Finally, I agree with VincentP. Just because you want to have sex with a woman doesn't mean she's not good at her job.

M.B.

P.S. What a coincidence. Moosie Drier used to live in my neighborhood when he was a kid. And recently I responded to one of his posts on the "Nextdoor" app.

P.P.S. I'd love to come and see that play as long as I don't have to get jabbed or wear a mask.

Jahn Ghalt said...

Possibly out-of-school, but here's a Friday Question:

I take it a writer (or team) gets a lump sum payment for a pilot script?

About how much did Fox pay? NBC the second time?

(is it regulated by WGA agreements? negotiated? does your Agent get involved?)

D. McEwan said...

I was there in the live audience for that stage production you linked to at the end. Can my laugh be heard on the soundtrack? I remember laughing a lot. I still have the program. (I keep and collect theater programs. I have hundreds of them.)

Caleb Martin said...

I once got the network note: "can you make the dog in the scene wink?"

In post.

Ricardo Pineda said...

Douglas, get to work on your next book: I, Archivist.

VincentS said...

Was the title of the pilot MEOW?

Desmond Lewis said...

Hey VincentP. I hardly recognized you with your new consonant.

ScarletNumber said...

@Andrew

If you recall, the early seasons of Seinfeld had no plot. Very famously, when NBC received the script to "The Chinese Restaurant" they thought pages were literally missing.

Now, why were the latter seasons of Seinfeld plot-laden? Larry David was convinced to do so by Rob Reiner, who was a founder of Castle Rock Entertainment, the producers of Seinfeld. So even though Reiner wasn't a producer per se of Seinfeld, Seinfeld fans have him to thank for what the show ended up turning into.

Mike Barer said...

This sounds like a very creative way to say that Fox is a sleazy network.