Thursday, October 05, 2006

You're only as good as your last credit


Hello from San Francisco. Well, actually Emeryville but I can see San Francisco.

According to imdb.com I was the location manager on DANTE’S PEAK. This is news to me. I didn’t even see DANTE’S PEAK. Yet imdb has it listed and my agent is still pressing me for his commission. Nor was I the Environmental Production Advisor on FLIPPER although I was brought in to punch up his dialogue, and I was not the Location Manager on JURASSIC PARK even though I still write off Hawaiian trips and use Spielberg as a reference. I don’t know where imdb gets this information (I suspect my mother) but I’ve tried several times to get them to correct it but they won’t. So now when I get calls from other Location Managers (which I do) I just recommend our backyard for whatever they need. I’ve made a tidy sum on production rentals.

Worse are some credits they list that ARE true. How many directing assignments have I missed out on because potential employers saw I did multiple episodes of ASK HARRIET? Someone once said you’re only as good as your worst credit. We have shared credit on MANNEQUIN 2 for godsakes!

And then there are the credits imdb omitted that I am proud of. David and I created and produced a show on CBS in ’93 called BIG WAVE DAVE’S starring Adam Arkin. (Cancelled because they had to make room for the Faye Dunaway comedy and the Peter Scolari comedy. No, I’m not bitter). We wrote on the TRACEY ULLMAN SHOW, the TORTELLIS (okay, they were kind to skip that one), and we wrote and “guest starred” in an episode of OPEN ALL NIGHT. Notable because after that we never “guest starred” again.

OPEN ALL NIGHT was created by Tom Patchett & Jay Tarses (who did the BOB NEWHART SHOW and BUFFALO BILL). They asked us to write an episode. We saw that Jay was also going to be one of the series regulars so we asked if we could be in the show. They said, “Sure, what do we care?” So we wrote ourselves two fabulous parts. We were Sean & Evan, two swinging lawyers trying to pick up female mud wrestlers at a mace class. Tom & Jay didn’t change a word of our dialogue. All they did was add one little sentence in the stage direction:

THE WOMEN GET TIRED OF THESE GUYS AND FLIP THEM OVER THEIR SHOULDERS.

For the entire week of production we were getting thrown around all over the stage. Landing on our backs, landing on our heads. We were black and blue with multiple concussions. I still have a bruise. Finally, after the dress rehearsal just before the filming, Jay came to us and said, “Uh listen boys, we’re going to cut the stunt”.

Not only do I want to see that credit on imdb, I want it listed first.

9 comments :

Matt Watts said...

imdb had me listed as an actor in a german porn film... the back and forth with them became ridiculous as they insisted their source was reliable. btw, i would love to see The Tortellies... I can't imagine it being bad... I always imagined it like "Grady"... A spin-off that didn't get a fair shot.

Dwacon said...

I reckon I should be happy I only have one measley credit...

Almost had another but someone with more money to invest beat me to the Executive Producer slot.

Not that there's anything wrong with that...

David Schwartz said...

At least you're not just one of a number of people with the same name on IMDB. I'm David Schwartz # 7. They list a number of animation credits I actually did write(although only about 1/10th of the stuff I've been responsible for), but they also list a bunch of stuff I had nothing to do with. Reading about the movie I produced and the TV series I directed (I did neither), is a little weird...

The Master said...

It took me three years to convince the IMDb that I was not three different people, all with the same name.

Tenspeed & Brownshoe said...

I hate IMDB.

My publicist put on the most ridiculous picture of me and they won't take it down.

And they don't list certain types of television "magazine" shows. I directed an episode of Source All Access and it's nowhere to be found. They also don't list Executives in Charge of Production.

I hate you, IMDB.

The Minstrel Boy said...

i've noticed that the people who spout that "you're only as good as your worst credit" shit are people without a lot of credits (or none) themselves. they have also never had to swallow their pride (or lord knows what else) and just fucking take the money because the teen ager needs braces or the dog got sick...i've done some truly sick gigs, but like liberace and the critics i cried all the way to the bank then i got over it and myself, and got back to work.

Paul Duca said...

Is this something more than simply two people with one name? I mean, I can see there being a "Ken Levine" who is a location manager--and since he is most likely not a member of the Writers or Directors Guild (or you in the Location Managers), the identical name issue is not pertinent.

Rell said...

Actually, I want to hear what it was like working with Kristy Swanson. The incident with that ice skating show gives me the impression that she is not a terribly nice person.

Caroline said...

I remember Big Wave Dave's. I liked it.