Non baseball fans will laugh just as hard at this. Ichiro Suzuki is All-Star player for the Seattle Mariners after being a legend in Japan. Over the last few years he has been learning English. Here he is being interviewed recently by Bob Costas. I think he should be awarded citizenship for this answer alone.
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Oh, Ichiro has got a MILLION of 'em. Like the one where he'd rather punch himself in the face than go back to Cleveland.....
A lot of media people don't like him. Me? I think they're afraid he's laughing his ass off at them...Who wouldn't, for not appreciating comments like his...
Off-topic, but Variety has dredged up the claim that the sitcom is dying:
http://www.variety.com/article/VR1117989180.html?categoryid=14&cs=1
If Ichiro thinks Kansas City's that hot, I want to hear his review of Arlington in the summer.
That is quite possibly the funniest thing I've ever heard.
And true.
It's a basic rule - the first words in any language are the swear words.
Although I remember in Ball Four that they were trying to teach a Spanish-speaking player English, and by the point it was mentioned in the book, he had mastered "son of a bleach."
I can't even understand what he's saying. All I got was "August in Kansas City, it's so hotter than . . ."
"August in Kansas City it's hotter than two rats in a f***ing old sock"
I'm German. So bear with me if that's wrong.
Too bad Ichiro doesn't do more English interviews, he's really a funny guy. I hope the Mariner's turn things around here in Seattle, I'm hoping that Ichiro can get a ring. Hell, I would just like to have a Champion here in Seattle! The NBA took our last major champion to Oklahoma!
I thought it was wool sock, too. I had to google this to find out what he was saying, which admittedly takes some of the funny out of it.
And I guess I took the premise too seriously, because I thought "favorite American expression" meant WIDE-SPREAD, commonly known expression. Again, not something that I'd have to google.
So is this funny because he drops the f-word? Is he Chris Rock or Richard Pryor now? Is this our commond standard for funny?
Here's a common American expression: whatEVer.
Since people seem to be a little confused:
The actual expression is, "It's hotter than two rats fucking in a wool sock."
Ichiro botching it is part of why it's so funny.
I think this might actually have been from an interview in 2005. Here's a post:
http://ussmariner.com/2005/07/30/ichiro-and-costas/
The bad teammate was apparently Bret Boone, about whom Ichiro had this to say:
“I don’t know if it’s a good memory or a bad one,” Ichiro Suzuki said. “But when I first came over to play in the United States, I had had a few teammates from the U.S. who had played on my team in Japan. So I had somewhat of an idea of what American players would be like.
“But when I met him, he was kind of a human being that you would never meet in Japan. So, whenever I was around him, I almost felt like I was witnessing a creature, not a human being. It was fun for me to watch him.”
No matter what happens to the team, the Mariners, they have to keep Icharo. He is the spark of the team!
Oh, Ichiro has got a MILLION of 'em. Like the one where he'd rather punch himself in the face than go back to Cleveland.....
The quote is more like "If someone ever hears me say that I'm looking forward to a road trip to Cleveland, I want them to punch me in the face, because they'll know I'm lying."
If I was an AL team owner, I would have paid one of my All-Star players a million dollars for a recording of Ichiro's All-Star pep talk to the team.
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