Monday, September 22, 2008

The Emmys

Don Rickles should have hosted the Emmys. Or Ricky Gervais. Or any random seat filler.

In sixty years there’s never been worse co-hosts than Heidi Klum, Jeff Probst, Howie Mandel, Ryan Seacrest, and Tom Bergeron. (Snow White and the four dwarfs) Suffering through that excruciating opening where they vamped about nothing was like reliving my Uncle Lou’s 75th birthday party at Sr. George’s Smorgasbord.

And letting Heidi Klum do comedy is like giving a squirrel a grenade.

But Josh Groban’s medley of TV themes was fantastic. He’s talented, he’s funny, he’s versatile. Why not have him host the damn show?

The academy got it right this year. MAD MEN and 30 ROCK both deserved to win. Probably JOHN ADAMS too. The six minutes I saw of it before falling dead asleep were riveting.

I loved how the Best Reality Host category was saved for the end to build up suspense, as if anyone in the 57 countries watching this show could give a shit.

Note to Mary Tyler Moore – SLEEVES! SLEEVES!!!! For the love of God and all that’s holy. SLEEVES!!!!

Without the Emmys, movie actors would have to wait all the way till January to start winning awards.

The only real upset was Bryan Cranston winning over the other deserving nominees and James Spader.

Half the fun of the Emmys is the Pre-Emmys red carpet show. Local station, KTLA always has the best coverage. This year’s co-hosts, lap dog to the stars, Sam Rubin and empty vessel, Jessica Holmes conducted the interviews with their usual stupefying flair. I was on the radio at the time and unable to watch but my daughter Annie, and her writing partner Brock did. They provide some of the highlights.

Sam & Jess interviewed five DEXTER cast members, of which two died last season. They asked those two specifically what will be happening in the coming season.

Marcia Cross was asked by Sam what kind of sunscreen she was wearing. She said nothing and walked away. Sam announced: "No SPF for Marcia Cross. There's your headline!"

They couldn’t pronounce Zeljko Ivanek's name, nor did they appear to know what show he's from. He helped them out (DAMAGES, for which he won) and then Jessica, who apparently had no questions, told him how much she likes ICE ROAD TRUCKERS.

Bill Mahr plugged his new movie by saying "it covers a topic that's never been covered before." It's a documentary about religion. Yeah, it’s amazing how that topic has somehow slipped between the cracks for the last 10,000 years.

Eva Longoria had a fun outfit, complete with a giant bow. The KTLA “fashion expert”, Lori Somebody From Hell liked it, but Jessica asked if she'd heard the rumor that Eva is pregnant. Lori responded: "Well, bows like that are a great way to cover up being knocked up". Classy.

Thanks to Brock & Annie. And my agent, and the crew, and the beautiful escort I got from Craig’s List.

Nice touch showing past winners before each acting award. Tina Fey now joins an exclusive club that includes Jackee.

Every year I receive a handsome DVD from TIL’ DEATH for “my consideration”. And every year I think “in what universe???” Better to spend the $50,000 and hire another writer.

SLEEVES! Mary. Really.

When Ms. Moore clonked into the mic stand, Brock said "she just bumped into her twin."

When you watch the “In Memorial” feature don’t you always wonder who’s going to be last? Whose death was greater than the other deaths? And aren’t you glad they didn’t put Jim McKay next to Bozo the Clown?

The director of the Emmys missed a bet when he was giving his acceptance speech. He could have cued his own get-off music.

Most beautiful women of the night: Hayden Panettiere, Christina Applegate (pictured: right), Kate Walsh, and the girl in the Olay ad.

Funniest bit of the night: Ricky Gervais demanding his Emmy back from Steve Carell. And Tom Bergeron is trying to do comedy when these two guys are in the same room.

For all the hyperbole no one came close to Diane English the year she declared that MURPHY BROWN was the greatest sitcom of all time. Now she’s written and directed THE WOMEN, arguably the greatest movie of all-time.

The LAUGH IN sketch was painful. Like watching home movies of my Uncle Lou’s 75th birthday party.

The academy missed a few TV catch phrases in their salute:

“Gggggggggggggggggg!” (Gale Storm as Margie, MY LITTLE MARGIE). “Fuck!” (everyone from DEADWOOD). “Woof” …which means “Timmy, Grandpa is caught in a bear trap by the stream near that old oak tree – no, not that old oak tree, the other one – and you have to come quick and bring the first aid kit, but put on some pants first.” (Lassie in LASSIE), and finally: “ “ (Kathy Lee Gifford on REGIS & KATHY).

Jennifer Love Hewitt looked like the lead singer of the Cars.

I don’t think the academy will be giving Tommy Smothers too many more commemorative Emmys. Whether you agreed or disagreed with what he said, you had to admit it meant two less minutes of Howie Mandel.

How come Amy Poehler was nominated in the sitcom category for SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE?

For anyone in Azerbaijan saying, “What’s MAD MEN?” don’t feel bad. They’re saying that in Iowa too.

Cynthia Nixon has the world’s longest neck. She could be the spokesperson for Toys R’ Us.

I never understand all these variety-special-series categories. But as long as THE DAILY SHOW and the COLBERT REPORT win them I’m happy, whatever they are.

If you’re going to have a tribute to MASH, why not have the MASH cast come out of the tent instead of Kathy Griffin?

It’s always strange seeing Tom Hanks on stage with Sally Field. She played his mother in FORREST GUMP and his girlfriend in PUNCHLINE.

Barry Sonnenfeld’s directing Emmy still doesn’t make up for RV.

Anyone who says Jewish girls don’t know how to dress didn’t see Sarah Silverman tonight in her Catholic Girl’s uniform.

Winner Glenn Close said, “"I think we're proving that complicated, powerful, mature women are sexy and can carry a show." But she forgot to add, “On cable.”

How come that winning director for HOUSE thanked Hugh Laurie but not Cutthroat Bitch?

And finally, what does it say about the American public’s taste when this year’s Best Drama lost every week in the ratings to SCOTT BAIO IS 45 AND SINGLE?

See you next year when your Emmy hosts will be O.J. Simpson, Barry Bonds, and Phil from THE AMAZING RACE.

43 comments:

Kevin Lehane said...

The Emmy's has spent five years ignoring The Wire. The greatest TV show of all time. It's just baffling. As good as Mad Men is, it's not a patch on The Wire. But then nothing else is. A challenging, one of a kind, a visual novel ... no wonder it's been snubbed it's entire run.

Sigh.

Lizbeth said...

Steve Martin looked like he had too much Botox. How depressing. Now even the men in Hollywood are starting to resemble their wax facsimiles from Madame Tussauds.

rob! said...

they did a tribute to MASH...with Kathy Griffin? WTF?

once i learned Jenna Fischer had not been nominated, i didn't bother to watch, now i wish i had...sort of.

Anonymous said...

Ken:

I swear I thought I was the only living human being who remembered Sir George's. A guy who played football at my high school was always proud to have been the only one to have been asked to leave Sir George's because of eating too much.

Seriously, the snub of The Wire was not only ridiculous, but it forever rendered the whole nonsense irrelevant.

Steve Gorelick
KLA Radio, 1970

sonderangerbot said...

Wow, this sounds bizarre in so many ways really. But Ken, what do you have against Bryan Cranston? I thought everyone but Jerry Seinfeld loved him.

Can't remember who's won what when but they sure are hung up on 30 Rock. It's good but not that far ahead, by any judgement Mary-Louise Parker should've won best actress- after all she is ACTING. Come to think of it she was nominated in the wrong category completely, guess the jury never watched Weeds.

Mary Stella said...

I don't think the Emmy's give an award for Achievement in Make-Up like the Oscars. If they did, the people who made up the Laugh-In crew should win. Somehow they didn't all look decrepit. (Except Ruth Buzzi, but she was supposed to.) Maybe Joanne Worley did, but who could tell underneath all of those feathers?

Classy moment for me -- Jon Stewart waiting at the bottom of the stairs to congratulate everyone on his team as they came up to the stage for the Emmy acceptance.

Was it my imagination or was Terri Hatcher the only Desperate Housewife that none of the others touched during their presenter bit?

Ken, do you have video of yourself accepting your Emmy? If so, we want to see it!

gottacook said...

The LAUGH-IN facsimile joke wall with JoAnne Worley, Ruth Buzzi, Alan Sues, et al. was really painful. Couldn't they have scrubbed it in rehearsals? Or gotten Goldie Hawn to participate?

(I reminded my girls, 10 and 12, that Ruth had been a SESAME STREET regular - and the "Sock It to Me" sequence with modern actors was pretty good - but as a regular LAUGH-IN viewer when it was on NBC, I wish they'd left it alone.)

One related point: During "In Memoriam" they did one subtly meaningful juxtaposition, putting Dick Martin just after Suzanne Pleshette, as he was a prominently credited BOB NEWHART SHOW writer in its last years.

Anonymous said...

I never understand giving an Emmy year after year to an actor for playing the same role!
I loved Don Knotts, but he won 5 Emmy awards for the SAME role!
It would be a lot more interesting if they kept it to one per role ... anyone agree with me?
P.S. - the show stunk! Thank God for fast forward on TIVO

Craig said...

After watching the show, I'm still not sure if Alan Sues is still alive.

VP81955 said...

Marcia Cross was asked by Sam what kind of sunscreen she was wearing. She said nothing and walked away.

Yet one more reason to love Marcia Cross -- she's too intelligent for such bull.

And to those who were dumb enough to think that a double masectomy would spell the end of Christina Applegate's career, take a look at that photo. A woman's beauty is not defined by her cup size.

Sebastian said...

This year I didn't even watch the show because I knew you would review it (like every year). Now I know which parts to skip, what to look for, and already think that I laughed more than I will watching the DVRed thing.

I know it's hard to liveblog but this is (I guess) what Bob Sassone was trying to write. I'd say epic fail but that wouldn't be a new assessment when it comes to liveblogs from that guy.

But as always he got an a for efford. He really captures the painful unfunny parts of the show.

Maybe he can get some tips from your daughter and her writing partner next time. And maybe I will wise up and not read it.

gottacook said...

Re: Alan Sues: Now that I think about it, he reminded me of Groucho Marx's brief appearance on a Bob Hope special I saw in the mid-1970s, called "JOYS," a hideously strained takeoff on JAWS. I was one of many new college-age Marx Brothers fans around that time, and I may well have tuned in just to see Groucho. He just had one line, I think, but it was so sad to watch.

(It's odd to think that Hope was such a dominant TV personality in those years, in part I guess because of his long-term NBC contract; is he little-remembered today because he wasn't that great in the first place, but rather simply filled a void? Or are there Hope fans out there?)

Anonymous said...

I loved that Tommy Smothers finally got his award. I have always loved him and his brother (one of the greatest foils in comedy).

And MTM... What was she thinking? Did all of the plastic surgery mess with her good sense as well as her good taste?! I was waiting for Betty White, that feisty old broad (LOVE HER), to say something to her about her grotesque bat wings. I would have slipped off my couch laughing really hard if she had. Too bad she didn't. :-)

Dan Coyle said...

"And letting Heidi Klum do comedy is like giving a squirrel a grenade."

DID WE LEARN NOTHING FROM SPIN CITY?

Wait, nobody watched Spin City, did they?

Courtney Suzanne said...

Ken, I'm in Iowa, and we love Mad Men in our house. So there.

That had to be the worst Emmy Awards I've ever seen. Painful. I agree with you that Gervais, Colbert, and/or Stewart would have been fabulous. It was also wonderful to see Don Rickles, who stole the show, IMHO. He's still got it.

Anonymous said...

I admit I didn't actually see it, but from reading the LA Times this morning it sounds like it should have called itself--
The Rich Diversity of Opinion Awards.
That would have been funny.

Allen L. said...

Wait! What? That was Mary Tyler Moore? I thought the Cryptkeeper was wearing a human suit!
Crikey!

Hugh Betcha said...

The opening with the 5 reality show hosts -- even Black folks watching that in Compton, California said "A shonda. What a shonda."

On the topic of Black folks, when THE COLBERT REPORT won, I had the same reaction as when THE DAILY SHOW won in previous years -- why do excellent satirical news shows with a definite liberal vibe have full time writing teams that are not as racially diverse as the Republican National Convention? What's that all about?

paul said...

Kate WALSH!

THANK YOU for mentioning her because it was driving me nuts that I couldn't remember her name.

I've always thought she was smokin', but there's also a rabbit-in-the-pot vibe going on there.

That said, I stop Tivo to watch the Cadillac ads, so...

jbryant said...

Certainly no argument about Gervais and Rickles stealing the show. Steve Martin was funny as well (and re his appearance: isn't it ever possible that aging celebs look odd to us at a certain point because they're, y'know, aging? Maybe he's had Botox, I dunno. But either way, at 63 he's not gonna look like that wild and crazy guy from 1978).

mary stella: Colbert did the individual stairway congrats to his fellow writers, too. I didn't happen to notice that Stewart did it as well, but I believe you.

anonymous: I have no problem with actors winning multiple times for the same role. It's not like they use the same scripts every year. That said, it can get ridiculous. John Larroquette famously took his name out of consideration after his 4th win for Night Court.

sonderangerbot: I assume Ken has nothing against Bryan Cranston -- but his win WAS an upset, in the sense that no one expected him to win. It was well-deserved (even though I continue to be surprised that Hugh Laurie has never managed to win).

I was surprised by Jean Smart's win, though it probably doesn't qualify as an upset (as many have noted, the most upsetting thing in the category was the absence of Jenna Fischer). Surely Zeljko Ivanek and Dianne Weist were upsets, and I didn't expect Jeremy Piven to three-peat.

Bob said...

Regarding the popularity of Bob Hope, a lot depends on the era you're from. If you're old enough to have followed Hope in his movie days, you remember him fondly; that's why he was a comic hero to folks like Woody Allen. But if, like me, you came to know him through a seemingly endless string of apocalyptically bad TV specials, you wonder what anyone ever saw in him.

Note to today's mega-performers: try to gracefully leave the stage when you're on top, OK?

Elena said...

Ken--totally agree w you on MTM, I couldn't stop looking at her arms, then hated myself for being so superficial--sleeves please next time. That said I loved that she and Betty White gave out an award. The Emmys would have done better to have more of the older stars give out awards--tied to the old sets they kept featuring.

Fav moment - Don Rickles going off script
Worst moment - The excruciatingly long bit giving out the reality host Emmy.

Anonymous said...

Hugh Betcha -- because when you are at the sharp end of the shit stick as blacks are in this country, you don't see the humor in satire.

Emily Blake said...

I couldn't stop staring at all the plastic surgery. Every older woman up there looked like a janitor had run over her face with a buffer.

I was so relieved to see Betty White looking like a friendly old grandma, not "I'm Trying To Hang Onto My Youth Barbie."

Annie said...

I watched the final game at Yankee Stadium, which has a much nicer facade than the Emmy show. I'm boycotting the Emmys until either Ken or I get nominated. And I'm really glad I missed MTM. I saw Liz Taylor sleeveless years ago and never recovered.

Couldn't stand MAD MEN. Couldn't stand JOHN ADAMS. We need more 30 ROCK. Don't make me come down there and write it myself. Yes, I'm cranky.
-AE

charlotte said...

Watched with the sound off, only periodically un-muting when someone interesting to us was on stage.

Missed the opening. Seems like we dodged a bullet there.

Loved seeing Tommy Smothers get his Emmy 40 years after-the-fact from Steve Martin. Nice.

Loved that Tina Fey was handed an Emmy by Mary Tyler Moore and Betty White! How cool is that?!

Love Stephen Colbert and John Stewart on these things. They are always... oh, what's that word?... entertaining!

Especially nice to see the writers of THE COLBERT REPORT win... as WGA members at last! Now they won't have to sell their Emmys for money to live on.

Love George Carlin, but why was he both the first AND last person in this year's parade-of-dead-people clip reel? Not cool to all of the others that he got to be included twice. Also, seriously did not like all the cutesy little nods-to-I'm-dead-now quippy clips the Academy chose to use.

Watching the LAUGH IN wall, I couldn't help but think of "The mailbox IS Halderman!" bit on 30 ROCK and imagine Tina Fey and Amy Poeler backstage last night, cringing how that could be them in 40 years, trotted out on stage by the TV Academy to embarrass themselves by having to re-enact the stuff they're doing now.

The fact that THE WIRE might as well have never even existed as far as the TV Academy is concerned, cheapens the whole idea of giving out any Emmys at all. So tremendously wrong. Unforgivable!

Mark said...

I'm so happy that Bryan Cranston won! I thought "Breaking Bad" was one of the best new shows last year, and his performance was brilliant.

Joey H said...

Favorite part was Rickles. Let him host next year.

Second fav...Christina Hendricks' dress.

jbryant said...

I'm still puzzling over that opening. Did someone REALLY think it was a good idea to throw those five out there to vamp on the fact that they hadn't prepared anything? They kept saying, "Seriously, we didn't prepare anything." And America kept saying, "Uh yeah, we get that. And?"

Mate Famber said...

I live in Iowa and I know "Mad Men" and I find it to be very good...nice cheap shot, though.
Iowa jokes are so 1987.

Ethan said...

Don Rickles was the only truly funny and entertaining thing about this years Emmys. the man is a legend.

Cap'n Bob Napier said...

If Bob Hope's only credit was his USO tours he'd be eligible for sainthood. I saw him in Nam in '68 and it made my tour.

Michael Zand said...

C'mon Ken, I can only assume you haven't seen "Breaking Bad." Otherwise you would've given it up for Bryan Cranston. He's brilliant in it. Sad, funny, heroic and it's a much better show than Mad Men and far more entertaining.

KEN LEVINE said...

I never said I didn't like Bryan Cranston or that he didn't deserve the award. An upset is a surprise victory by an underdog. Think of football. If I said the Dolphins win over the Patriots was a big upset it would not mean that I was ripping the Dolphins.

As for Iowa, come on people. It's a joke. MAD MEN, for all it's success, doesn't get two million viewers. That's minuscule considering the national viewing audience. There ARE tons of people in Iowa.. and Kansas... and California who don't know what the show is.

Anonymous said...

I'm stealing your Toys R Us joke. We'll never meet, and you would never find out about it, just wanted to be curteous.

Rory L. Aronsky said...

Wait, nobody watched Spin City, did they?

I tried, it was painful, I turned it off five minutes later.

angelmeg said...

The best thing about the hosts for last nights show is that will be the last time they ever do that.

Mary Stella said...

mary stella: Colbert did the individual stairway congrats to his fellow writers, too. I didn't happen to notice that Stewart did it as well, but I believe you.

Thanks, jbryant. I was chasing the puppies when Colbert won.

Did they ever announce the fan-voted "Most Memorable TV Moment"? I missed that, too.

While Tom, Howie, Heidi, Ryan, and Jeff were busy hosting, their shows lost out to Amazing Race.

Tallulah Morehead said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
D. McEwan said...

"It's odd to think that Hope was such a dominant TV personality in those years, in part I guess because of his long-term NBC contract; is he little-remembered today because he wasn't that great in the first place"

That's it. On the nose. Great timing. Fit the period well in the 1940s, but the ROAD pictures do not hold up at all, as compared with, say, The Marx Brothers or WC Fields. Their movies are still funny. The number of Hope's movies still worth watching is very small. There's a couple, but very, very few. Most are ghastly.

And after about 1960 onward, Hope was just horrifically painful to watch. His last funny remark came somewhere in 1963 or 64, and, like every funny thing he ever said, it was written by an underpaid writer.

"Cap'n Bob Napier said...
If Bob Hope's only credit was his USO tours he'd be eligible for sainthood. I saw him in Nam in '68 and it made my tour."

Cap, I'm glad he gave you a good time and lightened what must have been a terrible time (Were you just Private Bob back then?)

But there shall be no sainthood for Bob Hope, despite the millions Delores has given the Catholic church.

The government paid for those trips, every penny, every expense. Neither Bob nor NBC paid a penny. But Bob took along camera crews, shot the shows, edited them so he always looked to be killing. (Many of the soldier audiences weren's so amused by him, nor by seeing pretty ladies dangled in front of them but that they didn't get to touch, but whom Bob was banging left and right.)

On his return to the USA, he sold those shows to NBC for millions, millions in pure profit for Bob, but not a cent repaid to the government. Bab had a sweet scam there. He didn't become the richest man in show business by not taking full advantage of every break.

And then, along with the millions and millions he made off his war tours, he also got "Saint" status from folks like you.

Plus, it had the added attraction for Bob of getting him away from his family at the Yuletide. Bob tried his best to be as far from Delores and the kids at all times as he could. They interfered with his daily, almost hourly, epic womanizing.

Hardly compares with, say, Martha Raye, who wore herself out endlessly traveling, often on her own dime, to entertain troops the world over, with no thought of profit or self-promotion.

And then there was Bob's warmongering. He was a major hawk.

Bob Hope. Not my favorite entertainer.

Tallulah Morehead said...

If Ken Ehrlich ever tries to produce the Emmy Awards show again, tell Sarah Palin that he's a rogue moose who is teaching birth control and evolution to teenagers, and give her a helicopter and a rifle, because the Emmy Awards show he produced this week has got to be the worst Emmy show ever, and there is a lot of competition for that title.

Classical Shakespearean actress Teri Hatcher mispronounced the name of Zeljko Ivanek when awarding him an Emmy. In her defense, no one can pronounce Zeljkxo's name. His own mother can not pronounce Zeqlkjox's name. Apparently, when little Mr. Ivanghklzo was born, his mother was obsessed with giving her kid a name that, when placed on a red triple word square in Scrabble, would score in the high four digits. And Teri Hatcher doesn't always pronounce her own name correctly. Saying Zxqejlkome's Ivxadnaotch's name should have been handled by Howie Mandell. After all, on "Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman," Howie played Mr.Mxyztplk, so he has experience with pronouncing the unpronounceable.

I would rather watch Kathryn Joosten nap, than listen to anything Howie Mandell or Heidi Klum ever has to say.

As everyone knows, these shows tend to run long, and as it happened, the 1968 Emmy Awards Show wasn't over yet, entering it's 40th year, and Steve Martin (Who was hilarious) was out there to give Tommy Smothers his 1968 Outstanding Writing Achievement in Comedy, Variety, Scholastic Sex Education Film, or Pageant award.

And then came George Romero's horror masterpiece: "Comedy of the Living Dead." No wait. It was just a Laugh-In cast reunion. Was this still the 1968 Emmys? You could hear the excitement in the room, as everyone there under the age of 45 collectively said "Huh?"

They trotted out the reanimated remains of Gary Owens, Ruth Buzzi, Joanne Worley, Lily Tomlin, and the non-reanimated remains of the late Alan Sues. Sweet Dick Whittington was snubbed once again, and clearly Goldie Hawn had better things to do. (And I guess George Schlatter wasn't considered worth honoring. Well, he merely invented the show, and ran it for every episode. Fuck him.)

Gary Owens, as per his usual habit, was wearing the painted plastic scalp of a life-size G.I. Joe doll, freshly lacquered, while some graffiti vandal had spray-painted a black mustache and goatee on him. Gary Owens is a friend and a darling man, the sole resident of his own goofy private universe, and I adore him, but really Gary, we all know you're 200 years old. Why have Tom Sawyer blackwash your head before public appearances? There's nothing wrong with some distinguished white hair on a man.

Joanne Worley's appearance was hard to judge hidden inside the wig/hat/Acacia bush that was eating her head. Her face was in there somewhere. She looked like Miss Havisham as played by a very elderly drag queen. Ruth Buzzi and Lily Tomlin both looked not a day older than in their Laugh-In days. I suspect they both have Dorian Gray portraits hidden away in their attics somewhere.

But it was Alan Sues who broke my heart. He looked and sounded like he'd clawed his way out of his grave to be there. He was never a sophisticated performer, but he had energy, and strength, and a genuine zany streak, as well as being the gayest sissy funnyman ever to invade every living room in America. Next to Alan Sues, Franklin Pangborn was John Wayne.

No more. Alan's force, his robust comic energy, even his crack timing, all were gone. He appeared frail, bewildered, and sad. Betty White was in better shape, and she's 100! Hell, I'm in better shape, and I'm 110!

When he broke out his Uncle Al, The Kiddie's Pal character's catch phrase, "Kids, last night Uncle Al had a LOT of medicine." for the very first time, you thought he actually meant real medicine.

I was too horrified to laugh. Little Dougie knew this man in his prime, and this fragile animated corpse was like a sick joke version of Alan Sues.

The award they were handing out was Outstanding Comedy, Variety, Music, Dog Show, or School Play, and it went to The Daily Show. Jon Stewart's spontaneous display of affection for the cast of Laugh-In was doubtlessly genuine, and certainly classy, but when he began assaulting them, I was alarmed. I was afraid that if he grabbed Alan in a bear hug, that Alan's spine would just snap.

On the other hand, if given a choice, I'm sure that being hugged to death in the arms of a sexy young man like Jon Stewart (Jon, there's an orgasm with your name on it just waiting for you here at Morehead Heights anytime you want to stop by and collect it.) is exactly how Alan would like to go.

In the In Memorium montage, Dick Martin's goofy line "Here's something you don't hear every day: Merry Christmas." made me laugh out loud, and then made me miss him all over again, and I started crying. Harvey Korman's clip made me laugh also. and George's of course. How bad are your hosts when the In Memorium montage gets more laughs than they do?

Then out tottered Mary Tyler Moore, beloved by all who have never worked with her, dressed as though she were 30 years younger than she is. Mary's body however, hadn't gotten the memo. It was like seeing your grandmother in a bikini.

These thoughts are excerpts from my longer piece over on my flog, for any who would enjoy more.

Cheers darlings.

James W. Pharo said...

Wait...which Emmys is that? THE Emmys?!? Aren't the Emmys on, like, soon?

I think Sunday's broadcast established the outer limit of irrelevancy AND mediocrity. While much good work was saluted, it's a quirky choice at best to commemorate that work by having a Friar's Club Roast cast of actors with upcoming projects (preferably ABD/Disney, evidently) do both bad comedy and bad tele-prompter reading.

Author X said...

The Wire never won an Emmy and was only nominated twice in its entire five year run. Very telling that the theme of the show was the decline of the American empire.

"A life, Jimmy, you know what that is? It's the crap that happens while you're waiting for moments that never come."
- Lester Freamon