Monday, July 04, 2016

Happy 4th of July

Why the hell do people buy home fireworks?

How many fingers and eyebrows do they have to lose? It's hard to vote for Donald Trump if you don't have fingers.

What parent in his right mind with children would set off something called a 12 inch “strike force missile”?

Or a “Mad Dog”
 “Bazooka Bear”
“Titanium Cracker”
“Dragon’s Wrath”
“Big Mama Jama"
“Brutal Force”
“Nuke Power”
“Pull String Grenade”
“Assorted Color Ammo Smoke”
“Caliber Blast”
“Car Bomb”
“Big Earthquake”
“Jumboshell Fountain”
“Cracker Jack in a Box”
“Deadly Fire”
“Battle of New Orleans”
“Pay Back”
“Mucho Grande – small” (isn’t that an oxymoron?)
“Air Raid”
Or of course the ever popular “So X*@! Good”?

Explain to me where these are “safe and SANE”.

Better to go to a city park, ballpark, or Steven Spielberg’s house. Enter a 5K race, cheer on a parade and pray that the grand marshal is someone more impressive than Tom Arnold.

Have a wonderful day. Display your flag proudly. Don't blow your fingers off.


Jim Grey said...

I used to buy home fireworks. It was a waste of time and money. I happen to live behind a country club (that I can't afford to join) that shoots of great fireworks every year. Now, we just watch those.

Mike Barer said...

About 30 years ago, Richland High School wanted to change it's logo. It was a mushroom cloud and was deemed offensive because the atomic bomb that landed on Hiroshima and Nagasaki were made at nearby Hanford. I lived in Walla Walla at the time and the TV stations were out of Tri Cities (Pasco, Kennewick, and Richland) and Spokane. One Tri Cities station was doing a man on the street interview with a student and I can't forget his response in Surfer type language he said "death and destruction baby, that's what it is all about!" That is a dude that would buy the powerful fireworks, if he is still around.

Jean said...

Meanwhile, in Compton, a 9 year old girl is waking up this morning with one less hand, missing three fingers from the other hand, and a messed up face. Safe and sane my "three letters" as my sainted mother in law used to say.

Anonymous said...

Here's a Friday question, since for some reason I've spent the last hour on YouTube going down a rabbit-hole of actor interviews. I originally wanted to revisit a few Fonz scenes, and whoops - where did the time go?

I'm in my late 40's, so have been watching television since Happy Days. I've watched a lot of television. A LOT. I've seen many actors who are fantastic. But as an uneducated (in this area) layperson, only a few actors have made it obvious that this person is special.

Alan Alda is #1 on that list with no question. No debate. No reason to spend any time explaining that - his episodes on West Wing are still some of my favorites. David Hyde Pierce is way up on that list as well, though I haven't seen him in many things. But his acting on Frasier was obviously something special.

So here's my question - what actors (or actresses) have you seen/worked-with that are at the top of the pyramid? I know from your posts (I've been reading for years) that the two I mention are your favorites as well. But who has blown your socks off that we might not know about?


Richard (Milwaukee, WI)

Todd Everett said...

...Not to mention terrifying your (and everybody else's) small children and pets.

jcs said...

I completely agree, but given that it is perfectly legal in many parts of the US to purchase military grade weapons, I think home fireworks are a fairly minor problem.

The NYT reported a few days ago that "From 2000 to 2014, there were an average of 7.1 fireworks-related deaths each year.". As tragic as every incident is, statistically speaking this is a very small figure.

According to the CDC there were 33,636 deaths due to firearms in the US in 2013. This number is extremely high when compared with other Western democracies/developed countries.

Johnny Walker said...

Just go to a fireworks show. The ones of your back garden will never compare (unless you happen to be Steven Spielberg). I never understood home fireworks.

Tudor Queen said...

I live in a desert region. We're going through a drought, as we usually do by July 4th. Yet our state house, in its infinite wisdom, thought it would be a great idea to pass legislation making it every citizen's right to buy any kind of fireworks from any dealer and set them off on private property as they wish.

So, to summarize, people in a drought-ridden desert, which has always been plagued by destructive, often fatal wildfires, are encouraged to buy massive amounts of fireworks and set them off wherever.

Arizona: We're weird.

Mike Barer said...

Richland High School is still known as the Richland Bombers, I believe.

H Johnson said...

They've been trying to stop personal fireworks in Hawaii for some time now. We even have laws and everything! But with so many Asians living here and fireworks being so big apart of their... ahem... culture, the authorities tend to look the other way. So we make a mess, stay up too late and blow whatever expendable income is. Whee.

I agree. Home fireworks are stupid. we're putting mini and not-so mini bombs in the hands of people I wouldn't let hold a garden hose. Then we act all surprised the next day that some folks got hurt.

You'd think as Americans that going on 250 years old, we might grow up. Sure.


Storm said...

@Johnny Walker: Penny for the Guy, Sir? Penny for the Guy?

Boobies on the telly (after 9PM), freaks with blue Mohawks (Sorry-- "Mohicans"!) on the Tube, and kids in the streets begging for money to buy fireworks... these are my favourite confusing memories of London in '78.

Cheers, thanks a lot!


DrBOP said...

This post demands a historical supplement supplied by that well-known Constitutional scholar......Dr. Vincent Scully :

And I KNOW we ALL want to download that exploding Vin gif ;^)