Saturday, January 28, 2017

Ohmygod! Kellyanne Conway's stand-up act!

This is not to be believed no matter what side of the aisle you're on.  Kellyanne Conway in the late '90's tried her hand at stand-up comedy.  I'm not kidding.  It's jaw dropping.  And it's legit.  Thanks to the AV Club for the heads up.   This is what we in the business call an "Enemy of Comedy."  See for yourself.

38 comments :

Aaron Sheckley said...

Why is is so unbelievable? She's been opening for the greatest comedy act of the 21st Century for the past two years.

ScottyB said...

Now imagine Mitch McConnell up there doing the same material instead. With rimshots. Now *that* could be funny.

ScottyB said...

Oh, God -- I just figured out what this reminded me of: Those low-budget "stag party" vinyl LPs we had in the 1960s.

(If you're too young to be familiar with those hunks of cheese, go to YouTube and look up Buzzy Greene.)

Shelby said...

She's hilarious and a songbird!*

* signifies alternate fact

Bill Avena said...

Ken, thanks for the comedy stylings of that eager... beaver. But what really struck me was the notion of you reading the Onion AV Club (it's kind of a young folks' site) I'd like to see you jumping into discussions of "The CW orders DYNASTY pilot, and possibly some shoulder pads" or "NBC is throwing itself a birthday party with Kelsey Grammar's help".

Dave H. said...

Lilith would LOVE this

Paul Gottlieb said...

She's still doing the same act today? And it still stinks

Tom said...

Trying to avoid the most-obvious political comment of the top ten things Kellyanne is an event of, I will give her that her delivery has improved immeasurably in twenty years. She sounds overly rehearsed, unable to cope with reactions other than the ones she assumed. Nowadays she's almost impervious.

Pizzagod said...

What's been seen cannot be unseen.

Ever.

Looking for bleach for eyes and knitting needles to jam in ears...

Solid_Mike said...

At least she found her calling. Now if only Rosie and Amy Schumer would find theirs. #trumptrain #hahaha #careerchoice

Alan Christensen said...

Painfully unfunny. Sad!

VP81955 said...

Is this supposed to be a source of "alternative laughs" from Comedy Barbie ("Humor is hard!")?

Yet another example of right-wing punks' general inability to be genuinely funny.

Peter said...

How can anyone say Kellyanne Conway isn't good at comedy? Just last week she told reporters it was unfair to focus on the words that come out of Trump's mouth instead of listening to what's in his heart.

Johnny Walker said...

Ok, I'm going to be completely honest here. When it started, I didn't think it was that bad. She seemed very nervous, and I thought that's what was killing the material. Being a stand-up is very hard, and it takes a long time to become good. It's true that I didn't laugh, but, being fair to her, I could see the humour and the jokes, and I thought they kind of worked.

As it continued, however, it got VERY bad. As soon as she got to "a pundette with rice in her throat", I started to feel nauseous (fun fact: I literally feel sick when I watch awful movies -- not just watchably bad -- I love Ed Wood, but utterly, unredeemingly awful ones, an ACTUAL visceral reaction) and it got worse. I had to turn it off before I felt too sick. (I still feel nauseous writing this comment.)

Truly the anti-comedy :(

Barefoot Billy Aloha said...

Breathless, jaw-dropping awe. Woof.

Anonymous said...

Screw her. Spending my time watching real comediennes and comedians on the Sundance Channel's MTM show marathon. Last season and finale is tonight. Janice B.

VP81955 said...

In a better, alternate universe, Caroline Rhea is advising the president of the United States (yes, I know she's from Canada) and Kellyanne is working the backwater comedy circuit.

SharoneRosen said...

I am overcome with stunned silence

Mike Barer said...

She'll be on SNL soon.

Jeff Maxwell said...

Wow. It's obvious someone put LSD in my pea soup. I have no idea where I am anymore.

Todd Everett said...

In Russia, they put pee in your LSD.
What a country!

Cap'n Bob said...

Maybe I'm going deaf, but I couldn't make out half of what she said.

Jenna said...

Isn't this for a charity event? Not like she was actually trying to be a comedienne...

Andrew said...

"I was killing, Jerry. Killing. I killed." - Bania

Peter said...

Does anyone else find it ironic that the evangelical Republicans who call themselves pro-life are happy to let poor people die without healthcare coverage?

Isn't it also ironic that evangelical Republicans who call themselves pro-life always support invading foreign countries for their oil and killing hundreds of thousands of civilians in the process?

And isn't it also ironic that evangelical Republicans who call themselves pro-life always support the death penalty for perpetrators who are mentally ill or suffer from lifelong mental retardation?

I guess they have a rather novel interpretation of the phrase 'pro-life'.

Wendy M. Grossman said...

Bill Avena: I was 63 a couple of days ago and I read AV Club with some regularity. I like the writing and the commenters are fairly good value, too.

I don't think I can stand to watch the Conway video. I've spent enough time on stage myself that my idea of a horror movie is watching a live performer, good or bad, die on stage.

wg

Barry Traylor said...

Not funny them, not any better now.

D. McEwan said...

Yes, I posted about this a day or so back. Kellyanne Goebbels, never funny. On the other hand, in my Comedy Store days, I saw worse.

Diane D said...

I only watched a few seconds of it for the same reason Wendy G isn't going to watch it (although I have never been on stage), and because I have a similar reaction to what Johnnny W. has. I am in awe of anyone who has the courage to be an actor---especially live on stage. I once spent 3 weeks in New England (in the early 80's), and attended several Summer Stock performances. Some were held in actual small theatres, but one was a one-woman performance (not comedy) on a small stage in the center of a restaurant. Few people attended and my husband and I were the only ones paying attention. The actress was outstanding, and she acted her heart out in spite of the tiny audience. I wondered if she had even noticed, but my question was answered when it ended. The performance was barely acknowledged, except by my husband and me. We stood and applauded enthusiastically---I have never seen a look of such gratitude. We went over and told her how wonderful she was, she joined us for coffee and we had a wonderful evening of conversation.
I can't imagine what Kellyanne Conway's evening was like after that experience. I wonder if it was her last attempt---sure hope so.


Johnny Walker said...

Wendy, happy birthday! Re: The video. She doesn't actually die on stage. The audience pays attention and politely laughs along. She would have come off stage feeling like it had gone ok, I think. Her material is painful, however.

Jeff Maxwell said...

If she hadn't grown into being a psychopathic, lying mouthpiece for a man who might just as well have single handedly torn down the Statue of Liberty today, I'd give her a pass as just someone playing at being a comic for some corporate meeting.

I'm sorry, she's not a well person. And I don't feel so well myself today.

Pseudonym said...

I think she prefers the term "alt-seriousness".

Wendy M. Grossman said...

Diane D: I've done gigs in community college cafeterias at lunchtime. You did a good deed (quite apart from the fact that you really enjoyed her work). Things like that are *so* demoralizing.

wg

Greg Thompson said...

That'll teach Kellyanne Conway to ever do anything for charity. Come on, Ken. She didn't put this on a reel to get other gigs. It was an industry charitable function and it was, what, 20 years ago? Anyone have footage of a school talent show she fucked up when she was 11?

Mike said...

The following news items amused me:

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/jan/30/anti-trump-petition-to-prevent-uk-state-visit-passes-1m-signatures
In Britain, a petition to prevent Trump from making a state visit has collected over a million signatues. We're building a wall and we're making him pay for it.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2017/jan/30/wife-son-dumped-roger-curry-dementia-uk-car-park
You know when families get rid of an unwanted pet by dumping them by the side of the road? An LA family flew their vulnerable father to England, left him in a car park, and flew home. You'll not sneak him in that way.

MIKE BOTULA said...

Pardon me. Does anyone know where I can find the gas pipe?

DwWashburn said...

How appropriate for a walking joke like Kellyanne Con-Job.

Aaron Sheckley said...

For God's sake, sympathy for Conway? "That'll teach her to do something for charity"?? She is the Mouth of Sauron, guys. Little acts of charity (especially from 20 years ago) don't minimize in the least that she is now a professional apologist and professional denier for Cheetoh Mussolini. Doing a bad job at stand up, even if it was well meaning, isn't ever going to wash that stain off of her. The only way she ever deserves any sympathy is if it comes out later that Trump was holding her family hostage and forcing her to be his spin doctor.