Sunday, June 18, 2017

Happy Father's Day

On this Father’s Day (the most sacred holiday of the year) I’d like to wish a happy one to my dad, who also happens to be my hero, mentor, and best friend. I love you, Dad.  I'm in therapy for other reasons. 

Here are some pithy Father’s Day quotes:

“To be a successful father… there’s one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don’t look at it for the first two years.” -- Ernest Hemingway

“A man knows when he is growing old because he begins to look like his father.” -- Gabriel Garcia Marquez

“If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right.” -- Bill Cosby (always great to get parenting advice from this sleazeball)

“It is a wise father that knows his own child.” -- William Shakespeare

"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." – Mark Twain

“By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong.” -- Charles Wadsworth

And finally, a salute to Screaming Jay Hawkins. Screaming Jay was a r&b/blues singer. His big hit was “I Put a Spell on You” in which he came out of a coffin. The man was a crowd pleaser. And also a lady pleaser it seems. Upon his death when it was time to divvy up the estate it was discovered he had 57 children. Screaming Jay will not be saluted on Planned Parenthood day.

Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there.  Note to my family:  I hate power tools.  I'm more of a "free trip to Hawaii" kind of guy. 


Unknown said...

That famous Mark Twain quotation has never been authenticated and is probably false. Besides, his father died when Twain was about eleven.

Bill said...

I love Krusty the Clown's version of "O Mein Papa" in the SIMPSONS that had Jackie Mason.

D. McEwan said...

Maybe they should have called him "Spermin' Jay Hawkins."

"Dear Father, on this, your special day, I just wish to say thank you for not keeping it in your pants nine months before my birth. Glad you were a randy bastard that time."

Wally said...

US Adaptations of UK Shows

Interesting since Coupling was recently brought up and @StevenMoffat chimed in (the original kicked ass by the way)