Wednesday, November 03, 2021

Absurd but TRUE

Sometimes there's no need to write comedy, no need to write satire because real life is way more absurd than anything you could dream up.  Now the below is going to sound like a sketch -- like a spoof on all the woke cancel culture stories you currently read about.  This might be a piece in THE ONION, right?  

No.  It's REAL. This is from BleacherReport.com and I am posting this verbatim.  The entire article is here.

At what point do we say STOP THIS BULLSHIT ALREADY!?  

Here's the piece.  Again, this is not a comic essay.  It's legit.

PETA is asking Major League Baseball to change the name of the bullpen, a term used since the 1800s to describe the area where pitchers warm up, to "arm barn."

The nonprofit organization argued in a news release Thursday the longtime baseball term isn't "animal-friendly," per TMZ Sports.

"Strike out the word 'bullpen,' which references the holding area where terrified bulls are kept before slaughter, in favor of a more modern, animal-friendly term," PETA wrote.

Tracy Reiman, the organization's executive vice president, added: "Words matter, and baseball 'bullpens' devalue talented players and mock the misery of sensitive animals."

While it's possible baseball's use of the term bullpen derived from actual bull pens, there are various theories about how the word became associated with pitchers, typically relievers.

Comments anybody???

68 comments :

Sean R. said...

PETA is a joke. Any good work that they may do (which is debatable) is vastly overshadowed by this bullshit. They've long since stopped being an animal welfare group and are now just useful as fodder for ridicule.

Clint Robertson said...

Historically and traditionally, a bull represents strength. As the key player on a baseball team, a pitcher and the strength of his pitching are a great part of the strategy that wins a baseball game. The term "bullpen," while it may be derived from livestock management, has far too little association with that industry and far more of a connotation regarding the strength of the players who use it in an effort to hone their strengths to play their best game.

J. Allison said...

This kind of outrage always confuses me. If you don't think the name matters then why be upset about someone wanting to change it?

Philly Cinephile said...

Isn't bullpen also used in journalism to refer to where reporters hang out? If not today, then back in the day when reporters kept their press cards in the bands of their fedoras?

I'm sure that there are more pressing issues that animal rights activists could focus on.

I suppose "hangdog expression" will be next on PETA's list...

Jeff said...

What I find most unhelpful about this is it gives fuel to the fire that anyone who identifies as liberal or a Democrat is on board with this stuff.

Kosmo13 said...

I thought maybe they were going to claim "bullpen" was sexist because it doesn't allow for the possibility of a female pitcher.

LoganYenser said...

My question is: Why now? The term bullpen has been around for decades, as has PETA. Now all of a sudden they have a problem with it? Yeah, I'm sorry, but that's bull crap.

David Riche said...

PETA has a reputation for being on the lunatic fringe. I'm supportive of animal rights and protections, but I've never taken PETA seriously.

N. Zakharenko said...

Change Hawkeye's name because it ridicules defenceless birds.

Change Frasier's surname because it is insensitive to our Whooping friends.

Also the inter-net because it scares fishies and butterflies.

Urban Dictionary says Levine means "joining of two rolls of fat that creates a crease in the fat person's skin" -

For Weight Watchers .. er... W.W's sake ... change your surname immediately!

Rick Hannon said...

When this story broke, some of those batting it about on Facebook suggested that PETA was intentionally trying to get a few laughs. One comment noted that if so, it was the first time in history that PETA ever evidenced a sense of humor.

VincentS said...

Only two words: Oh, God.

Brian Phillips said...

Lose the speciesism, keep the sexism?

https://www.peta.org/features/rather-go-naked/

404 said...

It's stupid crap like this that makes it harder for people with real, legitimate concerns and issues to get anything accomplished. When you have clowns making headlines like these, other social causes that actually matter all get lumped in with the crazies.

Mike Barer said...

This is clearly something that will go on continually. New norms will be challenged. Ten years from now, will Notre Dame still be the Irish?

Kabe said...

PETA is idiotic. We have known it forever. Covering them and reading that coverage is fishing for outrage, which is something older people blame young woke people for.

Pinny said...

Yes, it’s sickening the number of bulls slaughtered at every single baseball game. End this senseless violence now!

Lothar said...

If we suppose that PETA has a priority list that means that all more pressing issues concerning animal cruelty are already solved. This is a good thing, hurray

Covarr said...

Low hanging fruit joke, but...

PETA's request is a bunch of bull.

Big Murr said...

Well, this conspicuously ultra-sensitive PETA person must have had a very busy day writing letters. "Bullpen" is used far and beyond baseball. Offices of all sorts, media headquarters, courtrooms...anywhere people congregate with purpose and work uses "bullpen".

Chuck said...

I can honestly say that I have never associated a pitcher's bullpen with bulls or bull-fighting. It has never occurred to me to wonder about the term's origin. Idiocy like this, conducted by groups such as PETA (which is, I believe, an otherwise worthy organization) is what pushes already uncaring people (read republicans especially) even further away. It's called backlash, and it's already hitting strong through-out this country in many ways. I believe it's only going to get much worse.

VincentS said...

As if bulls were offended by this.

Jim, Cheers Fan said...

has anyone ever really taken PETA seriously?

I'm pretty liberal and would vote Green if we had a multi-party system a la Germany, but.... come on.

Spike de Beauvoir said...

"Arm barn" sounds like something on a serial killer's wish list.

Ere I Saw Elba said...

Anonymous Jim, Cheers Fan:

has anyone ever really taken PETA seriously?

Too many people still do. I believe they began as a serious animal rights activist group, but they just dwindled into trolls.

I wish I could say the contrary, but that's a common pattern of how activist groups get corrupted and derailed in this country.

Craig Russell said...

On the other hand, when was the last time you did a column about PETA? Or even thought about PETA? If the old adage "any publicity is good publicity" still exists, then PETA did its job. Even if the topic was as ludicrous as this one.

Id bet they knew EXACTLY what they were doing....

AND when will they take on the Auto Industry to change the term "Horsepower"?

Thomas Mossman said...

The more I think about this, the less this seems like a legitimate demand for change and the more it sounds like an attention grab. With everything that’s gone on the past couple of years, when was the last time anyone really heard anything out of PETA?

This is going to amount to a whole Lotta nothing, other than PETA glutting themselves back in the public eye.

Necco said...

Hey...old people yelling at kids in your yard. This is purely a PR move. And it is apparently successful.

Matt said...

As others have noted, PETA is insane. Every time they open their mouths, they prove how detached from reality they are.

BruceB said...

This is the first time I have ever heard anything about the origin of the word "bullpen." I never looked for it myself, having no interest. I'm not even sure PETA has the correct origin. I know no one butchers any pitchers from the bullpen. Even with a really strong line-drive. I know Major League Baseball has never put any actual bulls in the bullpen. You can't throw a slider with a hoof. I think any connection between baseball and slaughter houses is confined to the concession stands. This is so silly.

Spike de Beauvoir said...

Maybe PETA is jealous of all the hype that Animal Rebellion has recently gotten in the UK. They blocked McDonald's depots demanding that their new plant-based menu wasn't righteous enough, and a few days ago scaled a tall building and swore they wouldn't leave till their ridiculous demands were met. So the best PETA could come up with is this bullpen controversy? I'd hate to see the genius ideas that didn't make the cut.

The coercion associated with advocates of plant-based diets is troubling. There are too many things they want crossed off the list of acceptable foods for everyone. (I'm descended from a venerable kosher butcher from Minsk who wrote a textbook on the subject and so yay meat.)

YEKIMI said...

PETA=Power for the Enormously Tormented Assholes.

Kevin FitzMaurice said...

"Arm barn" is a well-meaning, but silly alternative. I appreciate, though, the attempt to draw attention to the plight of these animals, and perhaps "bullpen" can be dropped. It just represents a thoughtful reconsideration of things previously regarded as insignificant.

Michael said...

If you are not familiar with the Twitter feed "Old Hoss Radbourn," you should be. It's hilarious, and it's done by someone who knows history and baseball. Old Hoss was a 19th century pitcher and cad who died young, and in one season, won 60 games. This was the response:

https://twitter.com/OldHossRadbourn/status/1453818363474546693

"Better idea: starters go 9, relievers find new work."

iamr4man said...

Honestly Ken, I don’t think anything PETA says or does can be held as an example of “woke culture”. For decades they have been saying and doing weird things to get media attention. Remember they supported Joe Arpaio because he stopped giving meat to prisoners? Their shelters are notorious for their high kill rate.
The media loves them because they are always good for a headline on a slow day. There are many many examples of some culture you can find that don’t involve the idiots at PETA.

blinky said...

The earth will be uninhabitable in 50 years but people are up in arms about insults to cows!? Maybe the cockroaches will have a better run as earth's dominant species in a few million years.

Spike de Beauvoir said...

What would Bugs say?

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/WesternAnimation/BullyForBugs

Warner's sound effects wizard Treg Brown recorded crowd noise from a real bullfight and used it for scenes in the cartoon.

For the life of me I still don't know what a trope is...but the working title of my memoir is "I Took the Wrong Turn at Albuquerque."

Big Ray said...

"Kenley Jansen is now warming up in the arm barn." "There's a big dust-up near home plate and here come the players racing out of the arm barn."

I'm probably in the top of the eighth inning of my life and don't have time for this nonsense. The ones I feel sorry for are the youngsters just starting out. Some causes are worth standing up for. This ain't one of them.

Saburo said...

John Thorn, the official historian of MLB, had a different take on the origins of "bullpen."

Bryan said...

There's woke and there's overly woke. This is just silly and another way for them to get publicity. Plus, the use of bullpen isn't just in baseball, just stupid....

Buttermilk Sky said...

Why pick on MLB when so many teams are insensitively named after animals?

Mitch said...

Doesn't PETA stand for People Eating Tasty Animals?

I prefer: Throw hole
Hot Arm Tub
pitching pen
TAR Hub (Throwing and Ready)
nap shack

Mitch said...

Of course MLB will get behind this, so they can sell the naming rights.

Now warming up in the Arm & Hammer pen, is Bob Eucher
or Amazon hatch
Buick Ball Hut
Progressive Go with the Flo Pen
Coke Hut
MidWest Hospital Future Tommy John surgery waiting room
SWA waiting area
Army Arm pre-gamer
etc.

Kevin from VA said...

This is exactly the kind of story Fox News loves to use to attack the left, liberals, the "lame stream media. With enormous success.

It's the same reason why millions of people in this country are far more outraged over a NFL quarterback taking a knee during the National Anthem than a President of the United States attempting a coup and shredding our democracy.

With apologies to PETA, "I've got bigger fish to fry".

Eric J said...

Totally stupid. Unfortunately, the stupider it gets, the more social media fans and bloggers propagate this crap. Instead of bemused, they come across as outraged, giving the story even stronger legs.

I have no solution, because this isn't going to stop as long as everyone has a social media outlet to vent their outrage. But participation isn't necessary.

Robert Brauer said...

Eh, mostly just comes across as an attention getting thing. PETA are quite adept at these kinds of stunts.

I'm Outraged! said...

It's just a publicity stunt, and it has worked as the equally ridiculous comment section proves.

slgc said...

PETA is just a bunch of Drama Llamas.

I've probably just offended them with that....

Darwin's Ghost said...

As a vegan, I'm often pissed off with the extremists who make the rest of us look bad. Vegans are already a cheap target for lazy jokes, but idiots like PETA add to the stereotype of vegans and animal rights supporters as fanatical. It's only a matter of time before one of them says it's wrong to say cheese when having a photo taken.

On a genuinely important and serious note, film director Terry Gilliam has become the latest victim of cancel culture after the Old Vic theater decided to drop a play he was directing because a few of their employees complained about comments he made regarding the trans movement. This lunacy has gone out of control. A British professor, Kathleen Stock, had to quit her job at a university because of a hate campaign against her by misogynist men who want to access women's spaces. Her crime was to say biological sex is real.

It's depressing to see so much of Hollywood has also been captured by this bullshit. People I've always respected are parroting this dogma and I'm willing to bet most of them don't believe any of it but are just saying it out of fear. This is a new Mccarthyism.

Darwin's Ghost said...

"Arm barn" sounds like something on a serial killer's wish list.

Spike, you win comment of the day. Thanks for the laugh.

Brian said...

Bullpen is complimentary. Now "Braves" on the other hand with the tomahawk chop...

Brian said...

I can't wait until PETA finds out there is a baseball player in the Hall Of Fame named Enos Slaughter.

And while we are on the subject of offensive names, I am offended by PETA because it reminds me of Petaluma, CA, the home of Wrist Wrestling and it conjures up bad memories of wrists that were forced into wrestling by their owners when they might have been enjoying some other wrist-related activity.

slgc said...

Urban Dictionary's definition of "Arm Barn" is NOT family friendly, FWIW....

Grant said...

Most "woke culture" people I know hate PETA and would resent being lumped together with them.

tb said...


Urban Dictionary says Levine means "joining of two rolls of fat that creates a crease in the fat person's skin" -
Wait, what? Hahaha

BJK said...

Everything everyone has said here about woke culture and PETA is true.

That being said, arm barn sounds a lot cooler than bullpen.

Cap'n Bob said...

I'm convinced that some crazies will try to get all animal mascots banned from sports eventually. They're already targeting American Indians.

PETA kills animals, lots of animals. They've outlived their usefulness.

Malaspina said...

Unfortunately more ammunition for the GOP.

ScarletNumber said...

@J. Allison

The reason it matters is because when you give someone an inch they want a mile.

---

As for Ken's question, when PETA makes announcements like this, it undermines progressive causes by making us sound ridiculous.

ventucky said...

I saw a bus stop yesterday in St. Louis that had a giant poster with a crab on it. It said, "Im me, not meat". It was sponsored by PETA. Why doesn't PETA protest all carnivore animals, including snakes and praying mantis?

Lemuel said...

@blinky:
Keep in mind William Burroughs' comments about the Insect Trust.

Call Me Mike said...

Yes, words do matter, which is why it's an etymological fallacy to ascribe the sole meaning of a word to its origin. 'Bullpen' evolved, just like animals have evolved. You ought to know that, PETA.

Mike deLively said...

I am all for letting the pitchers roam free in a cage-free environment.

Darwin's Ghost said...

Ken, have you heard about the extracts of Lana Wood's memoirs that have been published? She confirms what's been rumored for years, that Kirk Douglas raped Natalie Wood.

Rick Whelan said...

In a related development, the American Chiroptera Society wants major league baseball to change the name of the baseball "bat" to "wooden unbridled swinging stick" ... or "wuss" for short.

Barry Traylor said...

Well I suppose the term Bull Market is next to go.

Jim said...

“Bullpen”, as Ken well knows, was supposedly a term derived where “change pitchers” warmed up to relieve the starting pitcher.

A “Bull Durham” tobacco ad was quite prominent near one ballpark’s warmup area. Thus, bullpen. It never had anything to do with animals.

Don’t stop with your sports outrage there, PETA. Indoor stadiums all have catwalks. Football coaches, especially in Texas colleges these days, engage in monkey business. Literally.

The Detroit Tigers and Lions? Both teams are destroying those animals’ good names.

When an announcer says a baseball player ineptly hits a humpbacked liner, whales everywhere become melancholy.

Bats! Baseball doesn’t need to weaponize those cute little creatures we all adore.

The worst part of a baseball season is often called the “dog days of August”. Why demean our greatest animal friends?

Ron Cey was “The Penguin” due to his odd gait. Didn’t Burgess Meredith’s negative stereotyping do enough damage to Penguin Nation?

Jahn Ghalt said...

I felt my leg getting stretched, nearly five full months in advance of April 1st, so off to snopes I go....

(back)

Snopes accomodated us - and helped PETA after a fashion by reiterating their description of how cattle is slaughtered en route to dinner plates and burger joints.

Snopes also cited a couple ballplayer tweets in reaction to PETA's press statement:

No more dugouts then will refer to them as “Chute 1 & Chute 2”

But they are cool with the abuse “bats” take?

John W. Norvis said...

PETA has successfully trolled another fake Hollywood limousine liberal. For all his anti-Trump blathering, Levine is just another well-to-do white guy who made bank with comedy for other well-to-do whites. Now he's vanity publishing books and writing even more Wonder bread one act plays for struggling theaters while pretending to be some kind of high minded progressive voice in the wilderness?

Pathetic.