Now that we’re in March, networks start carting out their reality shows. People locked in a room, AMERICAN IDOL with inventions, etc. So as a public service, here are a few of my suggestions for reality shows:
DONNER PARTY SURVIVOR: every week the losing tribe votes someone off the island then eats them.
THE BOSS – interning for George Steinbrenner thus combining the Apprentice with Fear Factor.
CELEBRITY POSSE SWAP – Bette Midler’s fag hag entourage switches with Alan Iverson’s.
TIGHTROPING WITH THE STARS – Just because.
JOE WELFARE – Women with bad judgment compete for Mr. Wrong.
THE UNBELIEVEABLE RACE where people from Iowa have to take the subway from Woodlawn to Bay Ridge.
CELEBRITY MAKEOVER where every week Diana Ross gets something else done, and finally:
THE BACHELOR IN PRISON. Be careful where you put the rose.