My first mentor

Thanks to everyone involved in Sitcom Room 2008. It was a total blast. Details later in the week.

Here's another installment of my memoirs growing up in the 60s. This one deals with my early comedy influences and first mentor, since there were no seminars (or even hotels) in my day.1964

My birthday is February 14th. For everyone else it’s a day associated with love and an execution-like slaying in Chicago. For me it was sharing my birthday with a holiday that no one really celebrated in earnest. I said it was a day associated with love. Actually it’s more like the obligation of declaring your love. Forced gifts, forced flowers, forced romantic dinners. I always felt guilty that my birthday was just one more of those obligations.

My 14th birthday fell on a Friday so any restaurant that didn’t have a drive-through window was booked. But my mom suggested we have a party. It’s always borderline pathetic to hold a party for yourself at that age but I begrudgingly agreed as long as the guest list didn’t include both my friends and my grandparents.

Parties back then were incredibly lame. Everyone’s parents had to drive you and pick you up. We were too young to drink. Too young to smoke. Too shy to really fool around. What was left was ten awkward early teens listening to music, eating snacks, drinking Cokes, and not dancing. The Amish throw better bashes.

Gifts were traditionally 45 rpm records. I got all the new Beatles singles even though I already had all the new Beatles singles. (I wish I still had them today. I could retire.)

Quick side trip (I’ll be taking these from time to time): Not all of these Beatles singles were on the same label. Curiously, they were on five – Capitol, Vee-Jay, Atco, Swan, and Tollie. There must’ve been some complicated rights snafu but it also explains why so many songs were coming out at once. It’s not like Swam records had anything better to release.

A more eventful party a few years earlier was the one at Bonnie Burns’ house. For some reason there was a photo in her living room of Steve Allen. I loved Steve Allen. Once the host of THE TONIGHT SHOW, Allen then hosted variety programs on NBC and ABC that was far better and more cutting edge than THE ED SULLIVAN SHOW (as was LASSIE). I was first introduced to Lenny Bruce on THE STEVE ALLEN SHOW. And Bob Dylan. Even Kyu Sakamoto. Steve also surrounded himself with a hilarious cast of brilliant comedians – Don Knotts, Tom Poston, Bill Dana, Dayton Allen, Tim Conway, and one of my all-time faves – Louie Nye (pictured right).

There was a real sense of anarchy on his show. Allen frequently did inspired outrageous stunts. I remember one time he began his program by having a camera shoot from underneath a clear glass stage. He looked down at the camera and said, “What if a drunk suddenly staggered into your living room and saw this shot?” Wacky stuff you see on David Letterman – that all began with TV pioneers like Steve Allen (and also Ernie Kovacs).

I asked Bonnie why the picture of Allen and she said, “Because my dad is his head writer.” WHAT?! HOLY SHIT!! I was in the tract house of a GOD!

Most boys grow up and want to be baseball stars. Those boys had coordination. The first time I saw THE DICK VAN DYKE SHOW I thought, “Wow, bitchin’ babes like Laura Petrie marry comedy writers? I’m a riot for 12. I could do that!”

It seemed like a great life. Hang out with other funny people. Make each other laugh. Get paid for it. And attract long legged brunettes without having to master the harmonica.

Stan Burns became my first mentor. When the guy who wrote for Steve Allen and GET SMART says you’re funny it means a lot. He would go on to create, write, and produce the series LANCELOT LINK: SECRET CHIMP. Picture a James Bond movie but with chimpanzees that could talk. It takes a special mind to come up with that, and a special courage to actually pitch it. Stan did and it ran for two successful years on ABC.

To this day people think I grew up in New York. They can’t believe a Jewish comedy writer could come from the West San Fernando Valley. Hey, some of the funniest shows in the history of television were written right there. Not by me but still.

Sam Spade, Phillip Marlowe, Sherlock Holmes, and Steve Allen

Steve Allen created THE TONIGHT SHOW. He was an enormously talented man. Additionally, he was an accomplished musician and as if that wasn’t enough, a frequent game show panelist. He wrote numerous books on comedy. He won Emmys and God knows what else. He was one of my idols growing up. And one of my comedy writer heroes was his head writer, Stan Burns. But sometimes talent is not limitless. Mr. Allen could do a lot of things but solving crimes wasn't one of them.

Among his many endeavors, he wrote several mystery novels in which he and his wife Jayne Meadows were the two master sleuths. Needless to say there’s just a touch of grandiose ego in these unfathomable tomes. My favorite is MURDER IN VEGAS. Steve and Jayne go to Las Vegas. Steve performs in a big hotel showroom. And the bodies start to fall. The police are baffled. Ah, but not Steverino. Master entertainer by night, dynamite detective by day, Steve Allen does it all. Here are a few ACTUAL hard boiled excerpts. Mickey Spillane, Raymond Chandler – eat your heart out.

********


The first thing I did on coming off stage was to remove my formal dinner jacket and throw it on the couch in my dressing room, picking up a tan windbreaker in its place. From my dressing room closet, I also grabbed a tropical straw hat with a wide brim and a pair of dark glasses: private eye Allen was about to go incognito.
********
In the dream, after having erotic, but unfulfilled designs on an unidentified but highly desirable woman, I was suddenly swimming in an ocean at night…

(There’s an image I could live without – Steve Allen seducing a hot babe. Yikes!)
*********
Jayne reached out once again and felt the leg, a towel-covered thigh, and slowly her hand traced upward over the unconscious form, until coming to a cord wrapped tightly about Christie’s neck. It had been pulled with such vigorous force that Christie’s neck seemed broken, with her head lying to one side at an impossible angle.

Jayne loosened the cord, though she knew it was too late. Her heart was racing. “Oh dear!” she said. It was impossible to fool herself any longer into thinking this was a faint – Christie Hamilton had been murdered.

*********
I cannot claim the distinction of being Jewish, but a whispered “oy” escaped my lips at that moment.
*********
“Mr. Allen… there’s a phone call,” said the pretty slave girl in a pale lavender mini-toga.
********
As for young women, some of them seem to feel that since men are titillated by the revelation of a bit of kneecap, breast, shoulder or navel it logically follows that to quickly proceed to a state of either near or totally nudity is a wise course. They are quite mistaken in this. Or, to put the matter in simpler terms, one Sophia Loren is worth a thousand Madonnas.
*********

(And finally, I kid you not….)

And this young woman too, was obviously trying to sound as if she had spent her early years in a black ghetto. There’s something dumb about that, ladies and germs.

Steve Allen: Super Sleuth

Steve Allen created THE TONIGHT SHOW. He was an enormously talented man. Additionally, he was an accomplished musician and as if that wasn’t enough, a frequent game show panelist. He wrote numerous books on comedy. He won Emmys and God knows what else. He was one of my idols growing up. And one of my comedy writer heroes was his head writer, Stan Burns. But sometimes talent is not limitless. Mr. Allen could do a lot of things but solving crimes wasn't one of them. Among his many endeavors, he wrote several mystery novels in which he and his wife Jayne Meadows were the two master sleuths. Needless to say there’s just a touch of grandiose ego in these unfathomable tomes. My favorite is MURDER IN VEGAS. Steve and Jayne go to Las Vegas. Steve performs in a big hotel showroom. And the bodies start to fall. The police are baffled. Ah, but not Steverino. Master entertainer by night, dynamite detective by day, Steve Allen does it all. Here are a few ACTUAL hard boiled excerpts. Mickey Spillane, Raymond Chandler – eat your heart out.

********


The first thing I did on coming off stage was to remove my formal dinner jacket and throw it on the couch in my dressing room, picking up a tan windbreaker in its place. From my dressing room closet, I also grabbed a tropical straw hat with a wide brim and a pair of dark glasses: private eye Allen was about to go incognito.
********
In the dream, after having erotic, but unfulfilled designs on an unidentified but highly desirable woman, I was suddenly swimming in an ocean at night…

(There’s an image I could live without – Steve Allen seducing a hot babe. Yikes!)
*********
Jayne reached out once again and felt the leg, a towel-covered thigh, and slowly her hand traced upward over the unconscious form, until coming to a cord wrapped tightly about Christie’s neck. It had been pulled with such vigorous force that Christie’s neck seemed broken, with her head lying to one side at an impossible angle.

Jayne loosened the cord, though she knew it was too late. Her heart was racing. “Oh dear!” she said. It was impossible to fool herself any longer into thinking this was a faint – Christie Hamilton had been murdered.

*********
I cannot claim the distinction of being Jewish, but a whispered “oy” escaped my lips at that moment.
*********
“Mr. Allen… there’s a phone call,” said the pretty slave girl in a pale lavender mini-toga.
********
As for young women, some of them seem to feel that since men are titillated by the revelation of a bit of kneecap, breast, shoulder or navel it logically follows that to quickly proceed to a state of either near or totally nudity is a wise course. They are quite mistaken in this. Or, to put the matter in simpler terms, one Sophia Loren is worth a thousand Madonnas.
*********

(And finally, I kid you not….)

And this young woman too, was obviously trying to sound as if she had spent her early years in a black ghetto. There’s something dumb about that, ladies and germs.

Some people you might want to know

Last week in a blog post I made a reference to Oscar Levant. He was a personality/actor/musician with a razor sharp wit, a drinking problem, smoking problem, and a thousand and one neuroses. He spent time in mental institutions. He said some of the funniest lines in his day. He composed music for twenty movies. No less than George Gershwin thought no one played and interpreted his music better than Oscar Levant. In his later years, Levant would be a frequent guest on talk shows, chain smoking and shaking so bad it appeared he was having a seizure. He even hosted his own local talk show in Los Angeles, when he wasn’t hospitalized. He once fell asleep on the air interviewing a guest.

When his first wife married the movie theater tycoon Arthur Loew, he found the hotel they were staying at and on their wedding night at 2:00 in the morning called the room and asked Arthur, “What’s playing at the Loew’s State tonight and what time does the feature go on?”

He once said, “There is a fine line between genius and insanity and I have erased that line.” A noted hypochondriac, this is what it says on his grave stone:

                                            OSCAR LEVANT
                                                1906-1972
                                      See, I told you I was sick

Pretty interesting guy, no?

Some readers took me to task for referring to someone they felt was too obscure (i.e. they didn’t know who he was). I noted in the comment section, and repeat here – either just skip the reference or, if you’re curious enough, look it up. Gone are the days you had to schlep to the library. Two/three clicks and you can find out all you ever wanted to know about Oscar Levant. Or any public figure.

I also mentioned that I learned a lot about show business that came before me by seeing unfamiliar people (like Oscar Levant) on talk shows and seeking out their backstory. I owe a great debt to Jack Paar (you may have to look him up too) for exposing me to many of these colorful individuals.

So what I’d like to do today is list a bunch of names. If you are a serious student of comedy you should be familiar with these people, or at least a lot of them. Maybe some of them you are. But exploring their work might open you up to exciting new vistas. So that’s your homework assignment if it feels like something worth it to you and something you want to do.

Here they are. There are way more but this is a good start.

Bob & Ray
Kaufman & Hart
Laurel & Hardy
Abbot & Costello
Mosher & Connelly
Gosden & Correll
Klavan & Finch
Patchett & Tarses
Persky & Denoff
Larry Gelbart
Nat Hiken
Patrick Dennis
“Sgt. Bilko”
Preston Sturges
Jack Benny
Stan Freberg
Doug Kenney
Chuck Jones
Billy Wilder
Jerry Belson
Carole Lombard
Buster Keaton
Bob Hope
Fred Allen
Gary Larson
Jackie Gleason
Art Carney
Audrey Meadows
Moms Mabley
Steve Allen
Tom Koch
Gary Owens
Andrew Bergman
Richard Pryor
Robert Benchley
The Smothers Brothers
The Marx Brothers
The Charles Brothers
The Zucker Brothers
The Farrelly Brothers
S.J. Perelman
I.A.L. Diamond
Sophie Tucker
Phyllis Diller
Neil Simon
Bob Uecker
Jonathan Winters
Lenny Bruce
Peter Sellers
Sid Caesar
David Lloyd
Carol Burnett
Jeff Martin
Steve Gordon
Harold Ramis
Herb Gardner
Pat McCormick
Pat Paulsen
Senor Wences
Jack Lemmon
Ian Frazier
Flip Wilson
Paul Rudnick
John Hughes
Dale Launer
Jay Ward
Walter Matthau
Ernie Kovacs
Elayne Boosler
Mort Sahl
Tom Lehrer
Godfrey Cambridge
Elizabeth Montgomery
Tony Randall
Mort Drucker
Gary Burbank
Abe Burrows
Edgar Bergen
Marshall Brickman
Alan Arkin
Arne Kogen
Don Knotts
Louie Nye
Alan King
Jan Murray
Foster Brooks
Dave Thomas
P.J. O’Rourke
Zero Mostel
James L. Brooks
Danny Kaye
Eve Arden
Victor Borge
Dudley Moore
Dan Ingram
Dick Gregory
Terry Southern
Jackie Mason
Jackie Vernon
Robert W. Morgan
W.C. Fields
Ben Hecht
Gene Wilder
Steve Martin
Tracey Ullman
John Cleese
Mel Tolkin
Carl Reiner
Christopher Guest
Ivan Reitman
Lowell Ganz
Babaloo Mandel
Dorothy Parker

Look up even five.   I bet you'll thank me.

You're also welcome to add names I inadvertently omitted.

NOTE:  Woody Allen was omitted only because you all know who he is.   He was a HUGE influence on me and I suggest if you haven't read his comic essays or seen his early "funny" movies you're in for a real treat. 

My comedy gods

Phoef Sutton, an excellent comedy writer in his own right, posed this question recently on Facebook: Who are your comedy gods?

Here are mine… in no particular order.  Yes, there are a lot, but isn't it nice that so many people inspired me?   And I’m sure I’m forgetting a few.  If any of these names are unfamiliar to you, they're worth looking up. A few of them I have done posts on in the past and have provided the links.

Larry Gelbart
Jim Brooks
Allan Burns
Jerry Belson
Carl Reiner
Neil Simon
Nat Hiken (creator of Bilko)
Jack Benny
Elaine May
Mike Nichols
Sweet Dick Whittington (disc jockey)
Steve Gordon
Laurel & Hardy
Bob & Ray  (radio team)
Lohman & Barkley (radio team)
Carol Burnett
P.G. Wodehouse (author of brilliant farces)
Alan King
John Kennedy Toole ("Confederacy of Dunces")
George S. Kaufman (playwright)
Gilda Radner
Moss Hart (playwright)

Emperor Bob Hudson  (disc jockey)
Gary Larson ("The Far Side")
Phil Silvers
Jonathan Winters
Dan Ingram (disc jockey)
Glen & Les Charles
Jane Wagner
Billy Wilder
Bob Newhart
Preston Sturgess
Lucy
Treva Silverman
Mel Brooks
Woody Allen
Richard Pryor
Dorothy Parker

Elayne Boosler
Johnny Carson
Peter Sellers
Tina Fey
Don McKinnon (disc jockey)
Gary Burbank (disc jockey)
Gary Owens
Paul Rudnick
Albert Brooks
S.J. Perelman (humorist)
Robert W. Morgan
Tom Patchett
Jay Tarses
Jay Ward
John Belushi
Buster Keaton
Everett Greenbaum
Jim Fritzell
Bob Ellison
David Lloyd
Stan Daniels
Steve Martin
Daffy Duck
Danny Thomas
Andy Griffith
Fred Allen (network radio star)

Merrill Markoe
Jackie Gleason
Audrey Meadows
Art Carney
Stan Freberg (all around creative genius)
Ernie Kovacs (TV comedy pioneer)
Lloyd Thaxton (Ernie Kovacs of teen dance shows)
Gertrude Berg (radio writer and star)
Oscar Levant (noted curmudgeon)
Dale Dorman (disc jockey)
Garry Marshall
Bob Uecker (Mr. Baseball)
Sid Caesar (despite my personal dealings)
Louie Nye
George Carlin
John Cleese


Who are yours?

Seth Rogen -- today's Cary Grant (well, sort of)

It all started with Steve Martin – the doofas who thought he was really cool. Will Ferrell has since made a career out of that persona (what’s his next venue, the world of cockfighting?). Steve Carell plays this clueless guy to perfection on THE OFFICE. Ben Stiller has also found comic gold in the character. So has Jay from Silent Bob &. The character has even crossed over into real life with George Bush.

I’m always intrigued by what's the latest trend in male comic leads. The gold standard is still Cary Grant but no one has come along who can fill those funny boots. In the 60’s there were the Grant knock-offs. George Segal leading the parade, James Garner right behind.

In the late 70’s Woody Allen’s neurotic Jewish nerd was popular for a minute and a half. The rest of us neurotic Jewish nerds were hoping it would last at least until our second dates. No such luck.

Then Robin Williams with his brilliant ability to take everyone else’s material and make it his own. He was the flavor (flavors?) of the month.

After Robin there was just a hodgepodge of different styles. Jim Carrey, Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, Billy Crystal, Martin Lawrence, Rob Schnieder (dear God why?), Hugh Grant (at least he shares a name with Cary), Adam Sandler, the cast of FRIENDS, and a few others chased that comedy spotlight. Even Robert De Niro tried (his Fearless Leader in ROCKY & BULLWINKLE was grounds for giving back his Oscar).

Today we have a new comic persona topping the charts – the sloth. The slacker with more body hair than charm. Seth Rogen. As unlikely a leading man as you’ll ever find. No ambition. No money. No style. No looks. But you know what? He makes me laugh. I loved him in KNOCKED UP. Loved that he got the girl. Loved that he wasn’t a doofas who thought he was cool. It was refreshing to see a “regular guy” who was comfortable with who he is…even if who he is is, well…Seth Rogen.

For my money screen comedy is going in the right direction when Seth Rogen is the romantic lead and Paul Rudd is just the boring sidekick. How long will this trend last? I dunno, but if you’re one of those guys – judging by how long the Woody Allen window lasted – get your ass to the club TONIGHT.

My favorite comedy screenplays

Someone asked me to list my top ten favorite comedy screenplays. Fine, as long as I don’t have to do it in order and don’t have to limit myself to ten. These are my favorites, which means these are the movies I wish I had written.

ALL ABOUT EVE – Joseph Mankiewicz. Sharpest dialogue I’ve ever heard. The film is 60 years old and still crackles. Saw it again recently. What a pleasure to watch, especially now during the dumbing down of America.

SOME LIKE IT HOT – Billy Wilder & IAL Diamond. Disproves its classic last lane. Somebody IS perfect.

HEARTBREAK KID – Neil Simon (although the hand of director Elaine May is clearly evident). Jewish men generally love this movie, Jewish women hate it. A young Charles Grodin gives the comic performance of his career. And Eddie Albert (yes, Eddie Albert) will make you laugh out loud. Ignore the remake.

THE LADY EVE – Preston Sturgess, story by Monckton Hoffe & Preston Sturgess. Screwball comedy at its funniest and most sophisticated. Barbara Stanwyck and Henry Fonda – not who you naturally think of as a comedy team but they pull it off with ease.

HIS GIRL FRIDAY – Screenplay by Charles Lederer, based on the play by Ben Hecht & Charles MacArthur. Cary Grant & Rosalind Russell trade quips at a pace that makes THE NEWSROOM seem slow. And every word out of their mouths is a gem.

ARTHUR -- Steve Gordon's masterpiece. For more info on Steve and scenes that were cut from his original draft, check out my archives.

TOOTSIE – Larry Gelbart (although fifteen other writers also had a hand in it). If there seems to be a pattern in the comedies I like its men posing as women or “Eve” in the title.

TAKE THE MONEY AND RUN – Woody Allen. This movie was a revelation, especially when you consider that at the time (late 60’s) most “comedies” were lame Doris Day type films.

YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN – Mel Brooks & Gene Wilder. “Putting on the Ritz” scene alone puts this in my top ten.

ANNIE HALL -- Woody Allen & Marshall Brickman. For my money the perfect romantic comedy. (How could the same guy write HOLLYWOOD ENDING?)

MOONSTRUCK – John Patrick Shanley. Okay, so there are two perfect romantic comedies.

CHASING AMY – Kevin Smith. Funny, real, pitch perfect.  What happened to Kevin after this? 

AMERICAN GRAFFITI – George Lucas and Gloria Katz & Willard Huyck. A consistently funny movie that doesn’t even try to be a comedy. And what a soundtrack!

DR. STRANGELOVE – Stanley Kubrick and Peter George and Terry Southern. The perfect black comedy. And there are no other perfect black comedies.

THE PRODUCERS – Mel Brooks. The movie not the movie of the musical based on the movie. That was dreadful.

LA CAGE AUX FOLLES – Jean Poiret, Francis Veber, Edouard Molinaro, Marcello Damon. Even the subtitles were funny.

FOUR WEDDINGS AND A FUNERAL -- Richard Curtis. Even Andie McDowell couldn't kill this English confection. But boy did she try.

SHOWGIRLS – Joe Eszterhas. So unspeakably terrible on every level that you can’t help but laugh throughout. (Okay, so that’s one I’m glad I didn’t write). It's a tribute to Elizabeth Berkley's talent that after starring in this movie she still has a career.

Everyone is invited to list your favorites. Including VOLUNTEERS is not mandatory.

My favorite comedy screenplays

Someone asked me to list my top ten favorite comedy screenplays. Fine, as long as I don’t have to do it in order and don’t have to limit myself to ten. These are my favorites, which means these are the movies I wish I had written.

ALL ABOUT EVE – Joseph Mankiewicz. Sharpest dialogue I’ve ever heard. The film is 60 years old and still crackles. Saw it again recently. What a pleasure to watch, especially now during the dumbing down of America.

SOME LIKE IT HOT – Billy Wilder & IAL Diamond. Disproves its classic last lane. Somebody IS perfect.

HEARTBREAK KID – Neil Simon (although the hand of director Elaine May is clearly evident). Jewish men generally love this movie, Jewish women hate it. A young Charles Grodin gives the comic performance of his career. And Eddie Albert (yes, Eddie Albert) will make you laugh out loud. Ignore the remake.

THE LADY EVE – Preston Sturgess, story by Monckton Hoffe & Preston Sturgess. Screwball comedy at its funniest and most sophisticated. Barbara Stanwyck and Henry Fonda – not who you naturally think of as a comedy team but they pull it off with ease.

HIS GIRL FRIDAY – Screenplay by Charles Lederer, based on the play by Ben Hecht & Charles MacArthur. Cary Grant & Rosalind Russell trade quips at a pace that makes THE NEWSROOM seem slow. And every word out of their mouths is a gem.

ARTHUR -- Steve Gordon's masterpiece. For more info on Steve and scenes that were cut from his original draft, check out my archives.

TOOTSIE – Larry Gelbart (although fifteen other writers also had a hand in it). If there seems to be a pattern in the comedies I like its men posing as women or “Eve” in the title.

TAKE THE MONEY AND RUN – Woody Allen. This movie was a revelation, especially when you consider that at the time (late 60’s) most “comedies” were lame Doris Day type films.

YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN – Mel Brooks & Gene Wilder. “Putting on the Ritz” scene alone puts this in my top ten.

ANNIE HALL -- Woody Allen & Marshall Brickman. For my money the perfect romantic comedy. (How could the same guy write HOLLYWOOD ENDING?)

MOONSTRUCK – John Patrick Shanley. Okay, so there are two perfect romantic comedies.

CHASING AMY – Kevin Smith. Funny, real, pitch perfect.  One perk of doing his podcast earlier this year was being able to tell him that.  

AMERICAN GRAFFITI – George Lucas and Gloria Katz & Willard Huyck. A consistently funny movie that doesn’t even try to be a comedy. And what a soundtrack!

DR. STRANGELOVE – Stanley Kubrick and Peter George and Terry Southern. The perfect black comedy. And there are no other perfect black comedies.

THE PRODUCERS – Mel Brooks. The movie not the movie of the musical based on the movie. That was dreadful.

LA CAGE AUX FOLLES – Jean Poiret, Francis Veber, Edouard Molinaro, Marcello Damon. Even the subtitles were funny.

FOUR WEDDINGS AND A FUNERAL -- Richard Curtis. Even Andie McDowell couldn't kill this English confection. But boy did she try.

SHOWGIRLS – Joe Eszterhas. So unspeakably terrible on every level that you can’t help but laugh throughout. (Okay, so that’s one I’m glad I didn’t write). It's a tribute to Elizabeth Berkley's talent that after starring in this movie she still has a career.

Everyone is invited to list your favorites. Including VOLUNTEERS is not mandatory.

My favorite comedy screenplays

Someone asked me to list my top ten favorite comedy screenplays. Fine, as long as I don’t have to do it in order and don’t have to limit myself to ten. These are my favorites, which means these are the movies I wish I had written.

ALL ABOUT EVE – Joseph Mankiewicz. Sharpest dialogue I’ve ever heard. The film is 56 years old and still crackles. Saw it again recently. What a pleasure to watch, especially now during the dumbing down of America.

SOME LIKE IT HOT – Billy Wilder & IAL Diamond. Disproves its classic last lane. Somebody IS perfect.

HEARTBREAK KID – Neil Simon (although the hand of director Elaine May is clearly evident). Jewish men generally love this movie, Jewish women hate it. A young Charles Grodin gives the comic performance of his career. And Eddie Albert (yes, Eddie Albert) will make you laugh out loud. There's a remake coming soon. I shudder to think.

THE LADY EVE – Preston Sturgess, story by Monckton Hoffe & Preston Sturgess. Screwball comedy at its funniest and most sophisticated. Barbara Stanwyck and Henry Fonda – not who you naturally think of as a comedy team but they pull it off with ease.

HIS GIRL FRIDAY – Screenplay by Charles Lederer, based on the play by Ben Hecht & Charles MacArthur. Cary Grant & Rosalind Russell trade quips at a pace that makes WEST WING seem slow. And every word out of their mouths is a gem.

ARTHUR -- Steve Gordon's masterpiece. For more info on Steve and scenes that were cut from his original draft, check out my archives.

TOOTSIE – Larry Gelbart (although fifteen other writers also had a hand in it). If there seems to be a pattern in the comedies I like its men posing as women or “Eve” in the title.

TAKE THE MONEY AND RUN – Woody Allen. This movie was a revelation, especially when you consider that at the time (late 60’s) most “comedies” were lame Doris Day type films.

YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN – Mel Brooks & Gene Wilder. “Putting on the Ritz” scene alone puts this in my top ten.

ANNIE HALL -- Woody Allen & Marshall Brickman. For my money the perfect romantic comedy. (How could the same guy write HOLLYWOOD ENDING?)

MOONSTRUCK – John Patrick Shanley. Okay, so there are two perfect romantic comedies.

CHASING AMY – Kevin Smith. Funny, real, pitch perfect, and you actually root for Ben Affleck. Now that’s good writing!

AMERICAN GRAFFITI – George Lucas and Gloria Katz & Willard Huyck. A consistently funny movie that doesn’t even try to be a comedy. And what a soundtrack!

DR. STRANGELOVE – Stanley Kubrick and Peter George and Terry Southern. The perfect black comedy. And there are no other perfect black comedies.

THE PRODUCERS – Mel Brooks. The movie not the movie of the musical based on the movie. That was dreadful.

LA CAGE AUX FOLLES – Jean Poiret, Francis Veber, Edouard Molinaro, Marcello Damon. Even the subtitles were funny.

FOUR WEDDINGS AND A FUNERAL -- Richard Curtis. Even Andie McDowell couldn't kill this English confection. But boy did she try.

SHOWGIRLS – Joe Eszterhas. So unspeakably terrible on every level that you can’t help but laugh throughout. (Okay, so that’s one I’m glad I didn’t write). It's a tribute to Elizabeth Berkley's talent that after starring in this movie she still has a career.

Everyone is invited to list your favorites. Including VOLUNTEERS is not mandatory.

Blogging for bucks!

Why can’t I get in on this scam? There’s a company called PayPerPost. Another called ReviewMe, Loud Launch, and SponsoredReviews.com. They pay bloggers to hype their products or give reviews in exchange for cash. As the guy who staged a seminar and renamed his daughter Dow Chemical Levine for product placement money I think this is a fabulous idea! Especially during the Christmas season. Sure it’s misleading and destroys all credibility but we’re talking XMAS CASH. (I heard someone refer to a twenty dollar bill recently as a "Yuppie Foodstamp".) Plus, I'm on strike. First however, I have to go back and retract some things I’ve said earlier in this blog. Anything I’ve ripped in the past – I didn’t mean it.

I actually loved the Oscarcast and think that movies are better than ever. Especially the ones that plan on launching expensive Oscar campaigns. FANTASTIC 4 -- now there's a great movie!

I’m sorry if you got the impression I hate Carnival cruise lines. Being on a ship with 10,000 other people (8,000 over capacity) just means you make more new friends who like to eat greasy bbq food at midnight.

I’d rather be canceled off a JetBlue flight than any other airline in the world.

If you’re looking for the ideal family outing, look no further than an NBA game. The players are all model citizens, and the crowd? Why it’s just like being at a church social with your neighbors.

A sitcom star waiting to happen is Traci Lords.

Getting Hepatitis A is a small price to pay to have the fabulous Wolfgang Puck cater your next event.

Celine Dion just closed in Las Vegas. Sorry you missed her. Nothing says love like the theme to the Titanic with circus performers flying around.

If I were Oprah, my book pick this month would be “Murder in Vegas” by Steve Allen.

And finally…Watch THE SOPRANOS on A&E. It shows the Mafia the way it really is – no profanity or nudity.

Hopefully, PayPerPost you will see that I am a whore and can be bought. Let’s do business! The only thing is, I would have to change the name of my blog to BUY KEN LEVINE. But hey, for $12, why not?

Mele Kalikimaka.

Being funny without an audience

Stephen Colbert and Trevor Noah were on Stephen’s show bemoaning the fact that without an audience they can’t gauge their comic timing.

Bear in mind they both do shows for adoring audiences that are thrilled to be there, and are TOLD to laugh uproariously. So what comic timing do they really need? Their audiences guffaw at everything. It’s not like they have to earn the laughs.

But they both said that they’ve never had experience doing comedy that wasn’t in front of audiences.

Well, there is a training ground for that. Or at least there once was.

Radio.

In radio you learn to trust your humor and trust your delivery. Your comic timing comes in conjunction with the music, or pauses for silence for effect. You have to determine in a vacuum just how long a bit should go.  You have to know just how much material to do at any one time.

Some of the funniest performers I’ve ever seen (or, more accurately, heard) hailed from radio. Bob & Ray, Lohman & Barkley, Dan Ingram, Gary Owens, Dick Whittington, Dick Purtan, Don McKinnon, Klaven & Finch, Steve Allen, Ernie Kovacs, Howard Hoffman, Dale Dorman, Gary Burbank, Jack Carney, Bob Hudson, Larry Lujack, Howard Stern, the Greaseman, and many others didn’t need a packed house of adoring fans to confirm whether something was funny. They knew it in their gut.

The difficulty Colbert and Noah are having is now doing shows from home they no longer have that crutch. It’s forcing them to communicate and it’s making them both better entertainers if not broadcasters. They’re both enormously talented. They don’t need that crutch. Lean into this.

The one late night talk show host who seems more comfortable in this environment is Jimmy Kimmel. And guess what? He started in radio.

Neil Patrick Harris to host a variety show

Mega-talent Neil Patrick Harris has announced he will soon host a variety show live on NBC. Variety shows used to be a mainstay of American primetime programming, but over the last thirty years or so have gone the way of the dinosaur, disco, and Fotomat. Can NPH revive the form? If anyone can it’s him.

From the ‘50s – the ‘70s it seemed that every popular singer or comedian had his or her own variety show. All you needed was a single single on the charts. Bobbie Gentry, a one-hit wonder with “the Ode to Billie Joe” got her own show. John Gary, who never even had a hit, toplined a series.

Among the standouts were THE CAROL BURNETT SHOW (great sketches and cast of regulars), THE STEVE ALLEN SHOW (ditto), and THE SMOTHERS BROTHERS SHOW (all of the above plus a subversive political agenda).

The rest were all pretty much equal. Guest stars, singing numbers, production numbers, monologues. Truthfully, their big appeal (especially in the '60s) was that they were in color.

But one variety show stands out as the most successful and incredibly bizarre. THE ED SULLIVAN SHOW.

It is hard to describe to someone who hasn’t seen it because it was so….well, incomprehensible.  And stayed on the air for over twenty years.

The host was a former gossip columnist named Ed Sullivan. No one has ever had less charisma and polish than this guy.  Ed was a middle-aged awkward lummox with no neck who slurred his words, and would either clutch himself tightly like he was holding his gall bladder in, or gesture wildly at inappropriate moments. Imagine Frankenstein hosting a network television show.

The format was strictly oldtime vaudeville. Ed stood off to the side and introduced different acts. Talk about variety – these acts ranged from rock stars to comedians, acrobats, opera divas, Broadway numbers, dancers, magicians, and puppets. Ed would also point out celebrities in the audience. He once introduced New York Giants quarterback, Y.A. Tittle as “Ya Tittle.”

A typical ED SULLIVAN SHOW would feature Ethel Merman followed by the Doors, Zippy the chimp, Senor Wences, Abby Lane dancing, classical pianist Van Clybourn, Bob Newhart, Italian singer Rita Pavone, and James Brown.

You’d think that was surreal but no, the real surreal part was that we watched this show every Sunday night. But here’s the big difference between then and now – when there was an act we didn’t like we just toughed it out in hopes that we’d like the next one. Intermittent reinforcement I think we called it back in Psychology class. Today, if you’re bored for two nanoseconds you move on to something else.  Viewing patterns have changed drastically since Variety's heyday.

For Harris’ show to work, the audience will have to embrace the notion of “variety” in a highly niche world. Fortunately, NBC has in NPH a host who can do it all. So if he can integrate with the guests (singing, dancing, spinning plates, whatever they do – and probably better) I could see him pulling it off. I hope he can. It would be nice to see something new on television (even if it’s old). And Zippy needs a gig.

Jessica Harper is a great sport

This is a re-post of an article from six years ago.  But it also has a GREAT payoff.   And it's a pretty funny story.  So it's worth sharing again.  Enjoy.

In early 1975 I was writing spec scripts with my partner, David Isaacs, trying desperately to break into the business. At the time we were going nowhere fast. The spec RHODA we had submitted was rejected. Then the producer left and we re-submitted it. And the new producer rejected it. (That new producer is now my next-door neighbor. I just keep re-submitting it.)

Anyway, on the way to lunch I need to stop at the bank. I probably bounced a check. I go to the back of a long line and notice that the person directly in front of me is Jessica Harper. Ms. Harper is a fine actress and at the time was very hot. She had appeared in LOVE AND DEATH for Woody Allen and had starred in the cult feature PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE among other credits.

Oh, did I mention I had a HUGE crush on her?  

So I begin talking to her. She’s very nice. I’m asking about working with Woody Allen, her career, anything to keep the conversation rolling. All the while we slowly inch forward in line. When she is finally at the front I decide to do something I never ever do. If you know me you know this is true.

I ask her out. Right there in the bank.

She very graciously declines. A teller is free, she dashes off, and that was that.

I get back in the car and relate the story to David. He of course, gives me shit for fifteen minutes. “You did WHAT?!” Finally, I say, “Someday we’re going to be big producers casting a pilot and Jessica Harper is going to walk into our office and read for us. And then she’ll be sorry.” We laugh, go back to my apartment, and continue working on a spec that will soon be rejected all over town.  Jessica goes off and stars in another Woody Allen movie and one with Steve Martin. 

Flash forward to 1993. David and I have a pilot for CBS, BIG WAVE DAVE’S and we’re casting. Who walks into our office?

Yep.

Jessica has no idea why we both seem to be beaming the minute she enters the room. Her audition goes well. She’s a terrific actress. She wasn’t totally right for the part but she still gave a great reading.

I’m on the fence about telling her the story. On the one hand, she might be a great sport and find it amusing. On the other, if we don’t hire her maybe she’ll think it’s because of the bank and we’re the most unprofessional spiteful assholes in Hollywood. So we say nothing. I’m sure if Jessica reads this or someone points her to this post it will be the first she’s heard of it. And I guarantee you she has no recollection of the bank encounter. Ten minutes of her life with some schmuck in a line.

But it’s still one of those delicious career moments. And for the record, I still have a crush on Jessica Harper and would be thrilled to work with her. She’s now a blogger and an author as well as an actress and the least I can do is plug her books, which you can find here.

Okay, that's part one of the story.  Here's part two:  SHE RESPONDED.  

 That is one fabulous story!
I would be lying if I said I remember the bank part (I DO remember the script) but I'm sure you were a perfect gentleman or I would have cut that conversation short!...and you were very gracious about the audition...these qualities make you a rare and compelling person in Hollywood!
Thanks for your kind words, and for sharing my link with the world. Hmmmm....wonder where we'd be today if I HAD gone out with you...? Food for thought...!
All the best Ken!
Jessica

Thanks, Jessica.  You are a sweetheart. 

The 101 Best Written TV Series

The WGA just announced its 101 BEST WRITTEN TV SERIES OF ALL TIME. Proud to say that shows I wrote for finished 5th (MASH), 8th (CHEERS), 11th (THE SIMPSONS) and 23rd (FRASIER). We’ll never know if they would have ranked higher had I not written for them. But seriously, I’d consider it a tremendous honor just to be associated with one show on this list, much less four. And to have all four in the top 25. Wow.

Here is the complete list.

Some random thoughts:

I wonder how many writers who have contributed so much to the success of these gold standard shows can’t get work today.

Anytime you put a list together and rank them you’re going to get disagreement. Especially when you’re combining genres. You have BAND OF BROTHERS just above LAUGH IN. How often is SESAME STREET and OZ on the same chart?  Personally, I think FRASIER should  have been higher but I'm not exactly an objective bystander. 

I have no quarrel with any of the top ten. Yes, there are some other shows equally as deserving, but I can’t think of one of the chosen ten I’d slide down to accommodate something else.

Shows from the early days of television generally don’t get their due. Voters aren’t as familiar with them, don’t take into consideration their impact at the time, and don’t appreciate them as much because styles change and they now may seem dated. YOUR SHOW OF SHOWS was not only hugely popular in its day, it was a major reason why many people bought their first televisions. It helped create the industry. And yet it’s ranked only 41. Another example: LATE NIGHT with David Letterman made it but THE TONIGHT SHOW with Johnny Carson didn’t? Not to mention THE TONIGHT SHOW with Steve Allen.

When I was a radio DJ in the ‘70s, stations would often ask listeners to send in their three favorite all-time songs and they would be compiled for a BEST 300 SONGS OF ALL-TIME countdown (usually on holiday weekends). We’d receive thousands of post cards. And the songs most listed were the current hits. Really? Your favorite all-time song is “The Night Chicago Died?” So what we did was just throw out all the post cards and make up the list ourselves. At least the WGA survey was put together by industry writers. Otherwise, THE VOICE might be considered the best written series.

There will always be slights. Personally, I thought WINGS was better written than a number of the sitcoms that did make the list. Same with BUFFALO BILL, RHODA, BECKER, and MAUDE. I’m sure one or two of your all-time faves that didn’t make the cut. But if the chart was the top 202 BEST WRITTEN TV SERIES there would still be four deserving ones left off.

I was thrilled that some shows that weren’t mega hits still found their way onto the list. MY SO CALLED LIFE for one.

I wouldn’t know where to place SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE because there were years it was the best written show on television and years it was the worst.

And finally, if there are shows on this list that you are not familiar with, treat yourself.  Seek them out.  I hope THE DEFENDERS is available somewhere.  But between Netflix, Hulu, Amazon, and a number of nostalgia channels like Cozi, MeTV, and Antenna TV you should be able to track a fair number of these gems down.

And once again.  It's an honor to be among the exceptional writers whose work appears on this list. Even the ones who can't get arrested. 

Another one of those great Hollywood stories

In early 1975 I was writing spec scripts with my partner, David Isaacs, trying desperately to break into the business. At the time we were going nowhere fast. The spec RHODA we had submitted was rejected. Then the producer left and we re-submitted it. And the new producer rejected it. (That new producer is now my next-door neighbor. I just keep re-submitting it.)

Anyway, on the way to lunch I need to stop at the bank. I probably bounced a check. I go to the back of a long line and notice that the person directly in front of me is Jessica Harper. Ms. Harper is a fine actress and at the time was very hot. She had appeared in LOVE AND DEATH for Woody Allen and had starred in the cult feature PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE among other credits.

Oh, did I mention I had a HUGE crush on her?  

So I begin talking to her. She’s very nice. I’m asking about working with Woody Allen, her career, anything to keep the conversation rolling. All the while we slowly inch forward in line. When she is finally at the front I decide to do something I never ever do. If you know me you know this is true.

I ask her out. Right there in the bank.

She very graciously declines. A teller is free, she dashes off, and that was that.

I get back in the car and relate the story to David. He of course, gives me shit for fifteen minutes. “You did WHAT?!” Finally, I say, “Someday we’re going to be big producers casting a pilot and Jessica Harper is going to walk into our office and read for us. And then she’ll be sorry.” We laugh, go back to my apartment, and continue working on a spec that will soon be rejected all over town.  Jessica goes off and stars in another Woody Allen movie and one with Steve Martin. 

Flash forward to 1993. David and I have a pilot for CBS, BIG WAVE DAVE’S and we’re casting. Who walks into our office?

Yep.

Jessica has no idea why we both seem to be beaming the minute she enters the room. Her audition goes well. She’s a terrific actress. She wasn’t totally right for the part but she still gave a great reading.

I’m on the fence about telling her the story. On the one hand, she might be a great sport and find it amusing. On the other, if we don’t hire her maybe she’ll think it’s because of the bank and we’re the most unprofessional spiteful assholes in Hollywood. So we say nothing. I’m sure if Jessica reads this or someone points her to this post it will be the first she’s heard of it. And I guarantee you she has no recollection of the bank encounter. Ten minutes of her life with some schmuck in a line.

But it’s still one of those delicious career moments. And for the record, I still have a crush on Jessica Harper and would be thrilled to work with her. She’s now a blogger and an author as well as an actress and the least I can do is plug her blog, which you can read here, and her cookbook, which you can find here.

What movies NOT to remake

It’s Friday Question day!!

scottmc kicks it off:

A question inspired by a NY Times article on the remake of 'Arthur', starring Russell Brand and Helen Mirren. Hopefully this won't misfire like 'The In-Laws', but it isn't promising. My question: what two or three movie comedies would you least like to see remade?

Well, first of all – ARTHUR. Making that movie without Steve Gordon’s brilliant script is like buying a Rolls Royce with a Kia engine.

I’d hate to see any of Woody Allen’s early movies like TAKE THE MONEY AND RUN and BANANAS remade. Knowing Hollywood, they would probably get Michael Cera to play the Woody Allen roles. Don’t touch anything by Billy Wilder or Preston Sturgess. Keep THE GRADUATE away from Judd Apatow. Keep any comedy that doesn’t have a thousand shit jokes away from the Ferrelly Brothers.

Hollywood loves to change genders in remakes. Don’t redo TOOTSIE but with a woman.

Don’t remake any Jewish themed comedies such as HEARTBREAK KID (a vile reboot) or GOODBYE COLUMBUS and then take the Jewish element out of it.

Billy Wilder had a great line. He said, “Why remake great movies? Why not remake movies that didn’t work and do them better?”

Remake the last six Kevin Smith movies.

From Doug Barry:

Shouldn't a good spec run about 20 or so pages for a show like MODERN FAMILY?

Just confused on how many pages a spec script should actually be and what's acceptable in the industry.

It depends on the show. But there’s an easy solution. Get a copy of a script for the show you wish to write. This can be accomplished in several ways. Write the show and ask if they’ll send you a script. Check on-line and see if scripts from that series are posted.

There are some Hollywood bookstores that sell scripts, usually at bargain prices.

And if you live in Manhattan, there are always two or three guys selling scripts at the entrance of Central Park. I think one of my BECKER scripts was going for $5.

Judith has a FRASIER question:

I just wondered: were there rules, formal or informal, about how episodes treated the main character, Frasier, in terms of how much the story line revolved around him, for example? Or was it just more common sense, we know who the star of the show is?

Frasier had to be integrally involved in every episode. Most of the time the stories revolved around him but not always. Martin, Roz, Daphne, and Niles could be the focal point of an episode but Frasier always had to be pivotal.

But this was not a chore since Frasier was such a great character with strong attitudes and moral positions.

And finally, from Stephen:

The subject of Saturday night TV has been brought up in this blog before, but I wanted to ask, why can other countries make it a viable night for original programming? In the UK, Saturday is by far one of the most watched nights of television. So why is the US failing on a night others thrive on in your opinion?

I’m just speculating, but US television is geared primarily to the 18-34 demographic. They’re the group most likely to go out on Saturday night. And have DVR’s and computers to watch shows whenever they want.

This is certainly a sea change from the 70s when CBS’s biggest night was Saturday. ALL IN THE FAMILY was so popular that people stayed home until it was over to go out. And the other shows that followed (MASH, MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW, BOB NEWHART SHOW, CAROL BURNETT SHOW)all finished in the top 10.

But that was even before VCR’s. Appointment television really meant something. And networks were striving to capture the largest audience they could. I’m guessing at the root of the difference between the US and UK now is that in Jolly Olde they still covet old people in their 40s.

What would you like to know? Please confine your questions to the industry and sexual advice. Thank you.

Crazy, Stupid, Love

I crazy, stupid, liked CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE. It was refreshing to see a romantic comedy where characters acted their age, the comedy was based on behavior and not violating a pie, and there were some genuinely big laughs. My biggest problem was that a better title for the movie might be CRAZY, STUPID, LONG.

They could have easily taken twenty minutes out of that movie and (a) you wouldn’t miss a thing, and (b) it would be a much tighter funnier and emotional film.

Not being a high concept romcom has it’s plusses and minuses. Again, I enjoyed watching people work through romantic entanglements as opposed to some contrived big hook like two idiots switch bodies after pissing in a fountain. Instead, we are treated to a series of subplots. And the problem there is that you have a lot of loose ends to tie up, and that takes time and additional scenes. The movie has a great beginning and nine so-so endings.

Of greater concern is that of all the plots, the main one with Steve Carrell and Julianne Moore was by far the least interesting. After many years she wants a divorce and he is cast out on his own. You’re supposed to hope that they get back together again I suppose but you really don’t. If there was some spark between them, some chemistry, some magic – I sure as hell missed it.  They were just two dull people and there was nothing to suggest that if they got back together again anything would be any different. At one point, after some tutoring by Ryan Gosling, Carrell starts sleeping with a bunch of women, and I’m thinking – Great, I’m satisfied. Let’s eat. But no, that’s not the end. That’s just the start of Act II.

As for performances, Steve Carrell plays the same character every time out -- the lovable schmuck trying to maintain his dignity and cover for his social awkwardness. And as such he's fine.  If there's a laugh to be had he got it for you.  Tim Allen used to play that part. Now it’s Carrell. Soon it will be Ty Burrell.

Julianne Moore has a tough assignment. How do you dump your puppy dog husband without having the audience absolutely hate you? With a mixture of skill and charm she somehow pulls it off. No easy task. It’s a tribute to her talent and likeability. But she’s not funny. And this becomes even more noticeable because everyone else in the film is.

Ryan Gosling really shines as the modern day Fonzie. He’s the real-life version of Barney on HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER. Gosling has the swagger, Gosling has the talk – his days of dating inflatable girls are over.

But stealing the show is Emma Stone. And she’s not in it that much. But every moment she’s on the screen your interest level goes through the roof. Her sequences with Gosling are the best scenes in the film.

Also notable is Jonah Bobo, who plays Carrell’s 13 year-old son, and Analeigh Tipton, who is the 17 year-old babysitter. Analeigh was perfect casting. A pretty teenage girl who is gawky and believable as a real teen. I’m sure someone at the studio said, “I bet with the right wardrobe Kate Hudson could play it”. Kudos to the producers for going authentic.

Kevin Bacon makes the most of a too-small role and the best thing is, since this is a big ensemble piece, I think you can now change the game to “Five Degrees of Kevin Bacon”.  Meanwhile, Marisa Tomei is funny and never ages.  I don't know how she does that.  She must have a portrait in her attic that now looks like Nancy Pelosi. 

Smart script by Dan Fogelman and the directing team of Glenn Ficarra and John Requa get the laughs but never at the expense of the emotion. And if you think that’s easy, see any Nancy Meyer movie (at your own risk). This is what all of her films aspire to be and fall short by 2,000 miles.

CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE is worth seeing, especially if you liked… say, LOVE ACTUALLY and the length of LAWRENCE OF ARABIA.

Weekend Post

Here's some recommended comedy reading for those last few beach weeks of the summer.

Required Reading---

Neil Simon – Odd Couple (play)

John Kennedy Toole - Confederacy of Dunces (novel)

Recommended Reading --

John Vorhaus – The Comic Toolbox
Ken Levine – Must Kill TV
Woody Allen – Without Feathers
Woody Allen – Getting Even
Tad Friend - “What’s So Funny?”
John Morreall – “Historical Theories of Laughter”
Henri Bergson – Laughter, An Essay on the Meaning of the Comic
Steve Martin – Born Standing Up
Douglas McEwan -- My Lush Life
Tina Fey – Bossypants
Marc Maron – Attempting Normal
Andy Goldberg – Improv Comedy
Mike Sacks – Poking a Dead Frog

I want a ten page paper on one of these books from all of you by Friday.  

Friday Questions

Friday Questions are just a scroll-down away.

I’m honored that radio legend,Tom Leykis has the first one.

I have a question for discussion and I think there's no one better to ask.

Just as you enjoyed Parasite, I have recently seen some amazing TV comedies that all have one thing in common with Parasite: none of them were made in the United States.

Through the magic of streaming, I have been delighted at the quality of shows like Fleabag, Catastrophe, Motherland, Episodes (England) and Kim's Convenience (Canada). There are so many of them that I can't remember them all!

Do you enjoy any of these shows? Why can other countries make shows like this, but US studios apparently can't (or won't) anymore?

I'll hang up and listen.

I like most British comedies. FLEABAG and EPISODES are way better than the current U.S. fare (it pains me to say). And among my all-time favorite sitcoms are three from the U.K. – COUPLING, FAWLTY TOWERS, and BLACK ADDER.

So why are international comedies better than ours? The short answer is that foreign showrunners aren’t subjected to the insane level of network and studio interference. And testing.

And unlike here, where networks are just chasing Millennial writers hoping to get a Millennial audience (that has already abandoned them and is never coming back) foreign TV networks and platforms welcome age and experience. Who knew that writers over 40 were still funny and knew their craft?

My sense is international broadcasters are open to trying new things. American broadcasters operate solely out of fear.

Cedricstudio is up next.

Tonight I watched 'Arthur' (the 1981 original starring Dudley Moore). Writer Steve Gordon was nominated for an Oscar and deservedly so. However, the writing strikes me as a bit *too* perfect, at least by modern standards. What I mean is, characters constantly toss off sparkling banter that I find way too sharp and clever to be believable. Hobson the butler is especially witty, almost supernaturally so. Every time he opens his mouth out comes the perfect stinging quip (John Gielgud won an Oscar for the performance). Yes it makes me chuckle but it also takes me out of the movie. Nobody speaks like that in the real world and it strikes me as artificial. Do you think that's a fair criticism, or am I putting too much value on "authenticity"?

I think you are. The dialogue is stylized but so is Edward Albee’s, and Aaron Sorkin’s, and Neil Simon’s, and Paddy Chayefsky’s, Larry Gelbart’s, Quentin Tarantino’s, Woody Allen’s, and on and on.

It's a creative license to elevate the experience.  

The trouble comes when the writing is bad. Then the fact that it’s stylized exacerbates the badness.

Personally, I love ARTHUR and love that the dialogue crackles. And that seems to be a lost art in today’s romcoms. Studios are more concerned with mounting a movie that can score overseas and clever dialogue doesn’t always translate globally.

It’s another reason why I now write for the theatre and not the silver screen.

Cowboy Surfer asks:

Ken - I'm wrapping up my CHEERS binge on Netflix. I noticed former KLOS disc jockeys Mark & Brian sitting down the bar from Norm in S9 - E10 Veggie Boyd.

Any other stories of famous people as bar extras?

Well, the most famous of all was my father, Cliff, who appeared in a number of episodes.

We tried not to have any celebrities who would be recognizable so they wouldn’t distract from the story.

But some notables included a Hall-of-Fame sportswriter named Allan Mallamud. He joined the barflies several times. The man who hired me for my very first radio job as a sports intern at KMPC, Steve Bailey, bent elbows with the gang.

Warren Littlefield, then-NBC president appears once, and the final season all of the writers show up one time or another. I’m in the final Bar Wars episode.

And finally, from Chris Gumprich

Are there any actors who, if they came to you with a new project, you would agree to sight-unseen, just because you trust the actor implicitly? Conversely, are there any that you would turn down flat, even if you enjoy working with them as an actor?

Obviously I don't expect examples, and I don't mean someone like Roseanne who isn't likely to approach you with a new project, but someone like an actor from Cheers who asks you to work on the remake of The Tortellis.

There are actors I would consider doing a project with, but I’d have to be on board as to what that project is. Especially if I’m the one in the writing room until 2 AM fixing the scripts.

And yes, there are actors I would have nothing to do with regardless of their talent, star power, influence, popularity, etc. I won’t name names but you know who you are, Rosanne & Bret Butler & Cybil Shepherd & Teri Hatcher (among others).  

Come join me in San Pedro tomorrow night at the Little Fish Theatre for the Pick of the Vine Festival and Sunday night in Santa Monica at the Ruskin Theatre for their one-day play festival.  And if you're in San Juan Capistrano this weekend, I have a play in the Camino Real Show Off Festival.  Come see it and enjoy one of the prettiest towns in America.