Hello again from Chicago where I'm snowed in. But at least I'm not flying on United.It seems they've has added a delightful new wrinkle to their poor service and utter disregard for passengers. If you check-in anything more than one piece of luggage you will now be charged $25 for every additional bag. Unless of course you fly with them over 25,000 miles a year. So in other words, a thousand people.
Here’s what it means to all United travelers.
More people will be schlepping carry-on bags. The bins will be over flowing. The woman seated next to you will have to keep her shopping bag of meat souvenirs under her (and your) feet. Bins may open, bags may go flying, and you of course will be the one nailed by some idiot’s over stuffed carry-on.
And the security lines become even more of a picnic as each person now has more luggage to juggle along with their shoes, computers, coats, and their Glad bags that must be measured because God forbid you sneak on one extra ounce of toothpaste.
Lines to check-in bags, normally moving with the speed of a glacier, will be even longer as passengers protest this new policy and/or claim they have the necessary miles, which will require the agent to look up their frequent flier information.
What more can United Airlines do to make life more miserable for its customers? Well…let’s see. One of their daily flights from Chicago O’Hare to Minneapolis is apparently late….96% of the time.
And how about this? That bag you paid an extra $25 for – I betcha any money they lose it.
21 comments :
So when my wife and I fly United we are going to FedEx our luggage to our destination hotel. Not only will it be cheaper, but we will actually be able to track it if it gets lost.
How was that 18" of snow?
By the way, did everyone hear that the SuperBowl this past Sunday was the second most watched show on television. The first is still the MASH finale. Ken is still undefeated!
It's the 21st Century. Why don't we have transporters?
Well, Ken... at least we can wear silver jumpsuits with v-necks and hip boots.
Good luck getting past TSA wearing such a get-up, however...
Have a cheezborgay cheezborgay at Billy Goat's... or a cardiac special at Ed Debevik's...
And stop humming the Newhart song. We can hear you from here.
After carefully folding clean clothing and creatively stuffing my suitcase (with the breakables safely in the center) and managing to get it closed, I checked my bag with United last summer for a bumpy ride home. Mysteriously, some monkeys in the bowels of the airport had opened it, sullied and wrinkled the clothes, broken a breakable, and half-zipped it closed again, with a shirt sleeve sticking out. Inside my now-trashed suitcase was a photocopied explanation sheet from Homeland Security which explained absolutely nothing. And I think I'm missing a pair of boxers… Eww!
Fuck United. After many horrible experiences I've managed to avoid flying them for the past ten years. This only confirms my decision.
Fuck United. After many horrible experiences, I've managed to avoid flying them for the past ten years. This latest policy only confirms my decision.
Here's what I don't get about airport security: They know that using a cell phone or other electronic gear while the plane is taking off can cause problems; nevertheless they trust you to use those items properly. On the other hand, they don't trust you with Jello or a large tube of tooth paste.
Ah, yes ... United. I remember them well. Sometime in 2005 United managed to eclipse TWA for my personal-most-amazing-behavior-on the-part-of-a-flight-attendant award: TWA held this record for years after TWA's flight attendant Ratched had responded in 1991 to my request for an extra bag of peanuts saying "no, they're counted". This record flew on, although the airline did not, until on my way into Beijing, a United flight attendant pushed me out of the way twice saying (a) "get out of my way" and then, hours later, (b) "stay out of my way". I would have felt far better about myself had she worn leather.
By the way, Mr. Levine -- everyone says this is one terrifc Blog, and everyone is right.
UNITED is crap they even beat Northwest for lousy service, lousy, surly employees, filthy dirty airplanes (inside & out), You have a better chance of getting your luggage at all if you check it with another airline before you board United. They're pulling a stunt with this $25. fee that won't last, as soon as American doesn't follow suit, they'll retract the charge. Just like Northwest did for charging extra for exit-row seating. Notice only the most lousy of the lousiest pull crap like that. My last Hawaii trip TAUGHT ME WELL, never fly United, not as long as there's at very least a Greyhound bus going the same route.
And it also means people will be lugging giant suitcases. I usually bring two small bags that are easy to sling over my shoulder. Now I'll have to shove everything in a bigger bag.
I used to really like United. But now they're already adding this to what are usually the most expensive tickets anyway. Stupid.
Robert Hogan said...
So when my wife and I fly United we are going to FedEx our luggage to our destination hotel.
Marvin Hamlisch has been doing this on concert tours for more than 30 years. Not only does he FedEx his tux to the next hotel, but he has them dry clean and press it in time for the next city’s performance. Now, not to get personal or anything, but have you thought of how much you could save if your wife were willing to squeeze into a FedEx box?
I agree with Mr. Hogan's suggestion. For $25 you could FedEx your extra bag to your destination -- and with the mess the airlines have made of their schedules these days, it probably would get there before you did.
dude, there's thousands of airlines, just fly some other one.
at least United is doing something to protect you liberals from the terrorist
Spirit Airways started charging for bags late last year. $10 per checked bag at the counter; $5 if you tell them ahead of time online. Of course both times I tried to do it online, the feature wasn't working so they said to print out the page and the counter would honor the $5 price. All this to help Spirit keep their fares lower. We'll have to see if that holds true.
I failed to mention my last trip to Asia. The American United crew from L.A. to Narita (Japan) were pretty decent... but the all-Asian crew from Japan to Singapore were downright hostile.
"You want what? Water? Get back in your seat. NOW!"
Yikes!
No doubt these are just sneaky ways of offsetting the increased cost of fuel. I've always thought passengers should be charged by the pound; say, a basic seat price of $25 and the rest of your fare based on what you weigh.
The airlines I had serious with are Continental and Alaska.
Is there a truly compelling reason to visit Annie in mid-February during hypothermia season? Have you heard of "May" or "June?"
Looking out my office window here at an unnamed major motion picture studio on Melrose Ave, the palm trees are swaying gracefully and the mark of the merc is 65. Hurry home
I'm with vermonter; so many of these security decisions are ludicrous. I could take a flight attendant's eye out with a ballpoint pen, but they take my nail clippers? Sure, the little nail file thingie could inflict a little damage, but not as much as my car keys. Has any terrorist/hijacker in history ever gotten their way by wielding a particularly threatening nose hair trimmer?
Fuck United! Last time I flew them, we were going back home to Ft Lauderdale from Vegas, with a stopover in Denver, but we weren't changing planes, the Vegas plane was just dropping people off in Denver then continuing home to Florida. The flight leaving Vegas was initially delayed because they couldn't find a crew (nice excuse, right?). 2 of the people I was travelling with are attorneys and had court the next day, and we asked the United counter if the flight was going to make it back home to Florida, or if we should book another airline. "No, don't worry" they promised. Needless to say, we get to Denver and they kick us off the plane, they weren't continuing on. This is now about midnight. We bitch and moan, no other flights were leaving until the next day, and they wanted us to actually leave 2 days later since they were booked the next day. FUCK THAT. We made them put us on another airline (my friends missed court) the next morning.
Did I mention they managed to lose all our bags from Vegas to Denver? And we were wearing shorts and t-shirts because we thought when we got up in the morning we were just heading home to Ft Lauderdale? And that this was January in Denver and it was a blizzard? And we had no clothes because they lost our fucking luggage?
I vowed then, I would rather walk to wherever I was going than fly on that piece of crap airline ever again.
thanks for letting me vent
Lane
www.popculturelane.blogspot.com
Beware, though, of the hotel charging some sort of fee for receiving and holding the bag.
Hah! Having worked for an airline Allegheny) sometime back in my despicable past, I know never to bring any luggage that requires checking in, charge or no charge.* So, ship ship ship. Returning from Italy one year I shipped 100 lbs. of Parmigiano Reggiano along with a goodly mix of Pecorino Romano. Can you imagine the li'l agriculture dogs sniffing this pile If I carried it in checked luggage?
*I always shipped unclaimed and untagged luggage to Denver which was the farthest point in the system in those days. Management was amazed at my superior ability to process such luggage. This lasted over a year until Denver started complaining.
Suicide is painless, but flying United is torture.
May 1st, they announce the boarding charge.
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