Saturday, February 25, 2006

The last GINA (I promise)

After this you have to see the movie. (Actually, after this someone has to buy the movie). Thanks again for your very enthusiastic response. Short of a sale that’s the best I could hope for.

Okay, setting the scene: Late in the picture. Late night in Paris. Hank and Gina have been chased, shot at, and find themselves in:

******
EXT. RUE SAINT DENIS – NIGHT

The shady Red Light district of Paris. PROSTITUTES work the street, taking their customers up to seedy apartments, or MINIVANS that are parked along an alley. The scene is rich with smoke, hookers, lonely men, and bouncing SUV's.

Hank and Gina emerge from the Metro Station. The sleeve of his shirt has been ripped and now serves as a bandage.

A DRUNK (American) approaches Gina.

DRUNK
Hi there. Where you gonna be later?

HANK
She's not a whore, buddy!

DRUNK
Hey, I don't give a shit. For your hour she can be Mandy Moore.

HANK
I mean it. She's not a whore! And I'm sick and tired of every jerk just thinking she is!

DRUNK
Screw you!

The drunk hauls off and slugs Hank in the kisser. He goes down like a sack of potatoes. The drunk moves off and Gina crouches down to Hank who now has a pretty good shiner.

GINA
Wow. "My hero." You okay?

HANK
Oh yeah. (takes out pad) I now have a whole section for injuries.

GINA
(touched)
That was incredibly cool. No one's ever done that for me before.

HANK
It'll be some time before I do it again.

This would be a lovely moment if it didn't start to rain.

HANK
Oh for crying out loud! Again? What is it with this darn town? We might as well be in Tacoma.

She helps him to his feet. The rain comes down harder.

GINA
C'mon. Let's get a room for the night.

HANK
How? You have no purse and I'm dead broke.

GINA
Y'know, if Audrey Hepburn were here right now I bet she'd take your hand, look deep into your eyes, and say... MOTHER FUCKER!!

INT. METRO STATION – CONTINUOUS

Along with a few others seeking shelter they enter the station, now soaking wet.

HANK
It just occurred to me. What happens if you're agoraphobic and homeless?

GINA
For you to even think of that tells me you are incredibly deep. And more important, you need to masturbate way more than you do.

They wander through a somewhat dank tunnel. A number of HOMELESS PEOPLE are there, curled up for the night.

GINA
Well? Shall we?

HANK
Here?

GINA
Why not?

HANK
This is like the cast of "Les Miserables".

GINA
Lighten up. These are my "homies", my "peeps". And you're here so chances are they won't rape me.

They sit down along the wall, joining the others. Hank is very uneasy. A FRENCH HOMELESS MAN near him eyes him angrily. Hank half smiles and tries to be friendly.

HANK
Hi. How are ya? Seen the new Rothko exhibit at the Lourve? (man just glares) O-kay. You have a super night now.

Gina spots her disheveled self in the glass reflection of the billboard across the way and GASPS.

HANK
What?

GINA
Me! Holy shit! Is that how I look?

HANK
You look beautiful.

GINA
I look like Alanis Morissette.

HANK
No you don't. There is nothing in this world I would rather look at than you.

GINA
You really mean that, don't you?

HANK
Yes.

Gina is truly moved. They look at each other and something happens. They may not be willing to admit it just yet, but there within the bowels of Paris they fall in love.

They kiss, a long kiss filled with passion and genuine affection.

FRENCH HOMELESS MAN
My ass in the middle!

HANK
(breaking it off)
Right. Okay. Sorry. It's just that you have such a romantic city here that it's hard not to get swept up in the uh...amour of it all. (off his glare) What did we ever do to you other than save your ass in the war?

GINA
Hank! Let's just get some sleep, alrighty?

HANK
(cooling off)
Yeah...sure. (then) Y'know the Krauts were so confident they made hotel reservations.

GINA
We can talk about it in the morning, Snookems.

She snuggles into his shoulder, makes herself comfy. He closes his eyes and quickly drifts off to sleep. There's a look of total contentment on his face.

Gina, however, registers an expression of regret and sadness.

HOMELESS MAN
Why so sad?

GINA
(with heavy heart)
There is no way he'll ever marry me.

7 comments :

VP81955 said...

One wonders whether a vehicle like this might restore the reputation of someone like Tara Reid, who's now considered a joke in much of the entertainment industry.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, Tara Reid is one good movie away from a comeback. I can feel it. I mean, she already slept her way to the bottom. If she just flips that around...

Anonymous said...

Another argument in favour of Jennifer Love Hewitt is that she actually played Audrey Hepburn in a TV biopic a few years back.

alkali said...

I have been racking my brain for who would work in this and I think Rachel Weisz is the best I've come up with.

Anonymous said...

At last, a comedy script that is actually funny! I think Rachel Weisz is a great idea, I think Caroline Dhavernas from Wonderfalls would be good too.

Anonymous said...

Sad that this might be the last we get to see of this. I really like it alot so far, and have read it to anyone near me when I'm on your site (which is about twice a day).

Funny funny stuff, and i wouldn't like to see Tara Reid in the role, but I do agree that Rachel Weisz would be great.

Anonymous said...

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