Thursday, May 07, 2009

My take on Manny Ramirez

It will sure be interesting hosting Dodger Talk on KABC tonight. Manny Ramirez has tested positive for performance enhancing drugs and has been suspended for fifty games. Uh, there goes Mannywood. Big sale on those dreadlocks at the concession stands. And of course there are the thousand Manny billboards that are splayed over the southland.

This is a huge bombshell and a crushing blow to the Dodgers and their fans. Supposedly, he was suspended not for steroids but for some doctor prescribed amphetamine. I’d like to believe that’s true. I’d like to believe he didn’t cheat; he just showed incredibly poor judgment. And considering Manny's past history let's just say there has been precedent. Hey, will you people in Boston stop laughing so hard? It’s breaking my concentration.

There is another case of a player, J.C. Romero of the Philadelphia Phillies who was recently suspended fifty games for taking a supplement he purchased over the counter. He too thought it was safe. All he, or Manny, or any player who knows how to use the phone has to do is call the commissioner’s office for verification on any specific drug, supplement, or Tic Tac. If a doctor prescribes it that’s not enough. If you buy it at Whole Foods that’s not enough. If you call the players union and get their permission that’s not enough either. CHECK FIRST YOU IDIOTS!!!!

And again, I'm taking Manny's statement at face value. Who knows if more bombshells are coming? At this point I wouldn't be shocked if word leaks that Mother Teresa was also a gun runner.

Manny will return in early July and in all likelihood the Dodgers will prevail. This is a good team without him and I suspect the players will rise to the occasion. And it doesn’t hurt that they’re playing in a God awful division. But the betrayal to the fans is devastating. Yes, they may forgive him. They forgave Kobe. (Let’s see how New York fans welcome back A-Roid.) But it’ll never be the same. I feel sorry for all the kids who lost a hero today. I feel sorry for the McCourts who shelled out a lot of 2009-economy dollars in good faith to bring him to Los Angeles. In fact, I feel sorry for everybody... but Ramirez.

On a personal note, I like Manny. He’s a very engaging guy. A big kid. Fun to be around. I always thought he was a goofball, not taking them. And true, Manny's not the smartest ballplayer I’ve ever encountered but the person representing him – who is smart -- is supposed to look out for him. That would be Scott Boras… the same Scott Boras who also represents Alex Rodriguez. Nice job, Scott.

This is a sad day for the Dodgers and the game itself. As a lifelong fan, it breaks my heart. Is my love for baseball the only remaining pure thing about it?


J.J. said...

Personally, I think the fix is in. The MLB Commissioner is a secret Giants fan and has good Vegas odds that the Dodger's home winning streak ends against our rivals to the north.

Sexual enhancement drug indeed.

BigTed said...

It sounds as if Ramirez wasn't very smart here, but his doctor bears at least some of the responsibility. (Though he or she presumably won't be sacrificing $7.7 million.)

By the way, even if a nutritional supplement seems okay, it could have unexpected ingredients. There aren't a lot of laws governing what goes in them, and some manufacturers (though not major U.S. ones) have been caught adulterating their "natural" products with the chemical equivalents of prescription drugs.

stretchdogg said...

How does the doctor bear ANY responsibility? If I was making $25 millioin/year in a sport with a now very rigid drug-testing policy.. wouldn't I WANT to run every single "perscription" by the MLB powers that be, BEFORE taking anything that could even remotely cause me to fail a drug test. If indeed the doctor bears any responsibility, Manny should sue him. Never gonna happen.

KenS said...

From Ken, one of the bloggers you met Wed. night...
Somewhat ironic that I was in the dentist's chair having my tooth drilled when the news came over the office radio. I felt as numb as my gums. Not sure why but when Manny talked about prescription drugs, it was Bill Clinton saying "I did not have sex with that woman" that crept into my mind. Seems like preparing for your show tonight will be easy, huh?

James said...

Reading now that it could have been a drug to deal with erectile dysfunction...but it's not viagra or cialis...anything that boosts testosterone will increase sex drive, but why use something for ED thats not as simple as the little blue pill?

While I'm not surprised that any player tests positive in this era, I'm still willing to give some the benefit of the doubt when it comes to their explanation.

I think baseball also gets a hard rap when it comes to PEDs...this is a world wide problem across ALL sports; football, cycling, Olympics, MMA...

BigTed said...

Now they're saying the drug was HCG, a hormone women produce in pregnancy that is sometimes used by men to increase testosterone production (and is sometimes taken to counter negative effects of steroids). If that really is what he took, it's banned for good reason.

Paul said...

Don't blame his agent. His agent doesn't go with him to the drug store. Manny gets paid enough to know better.

John said...

Manny's going to have to have the doctor step up and explain why he prescribed whatever drug it was, and what the "undisclosed condition" is if he wants anyone to believe the medication wasn't designed to illegally improve his performance.

On the other hand, this does take the media focus in L.A. and around the country off Kobe's throat-bump on Ron Artest last night, doesn't it? So Laker fans should be offering up at least two cheers this afternoon.

Anonymous said...

nice boobs

Anonymous said...

My four-year-old, listening to sports talk radio with me over lunch, was excited to tell me, "Hey, he said Manny Ramirez!"

I just smiled.

A. Buck Short said...

Hey, cap-and-trade is all the rage. You know, where one polluting industrialist gets to buy toxic emission allowance points from another industrialist who doesn’t pollute enough to use all of his up. What would be wrong with baseball-cap-and-trade? The Dodgers ought to be given credit for all of their players who also take performance enhancing drugs and still can’t do sh*t.

And if the dude actually is taking a female hormone, the Dodgers should be allowed to offset that against the gallons of testosterone the Raybestos Brakettes must have been shooting during that phenomenal eight-season title streak in the 70’s. Yeh, it was the 70’s --musicians and athletes were still allowed to ingest substances that at least were work-related. Sometimes the simplest explanations are the best. Maybe the guy went with the pregnancy juice because he got tired of everyone calling him “Manny.” After awhile, I’m thinking that can begin to sound like a taunt.

I’m guessing the surest way to keep players off the hCG is to insist they ask for it by name: “Uh, yes, I’d like a .750 liter bottle of the gonadotropin, please. Can you make that to go?”

Monsterbeard said...

What kind of world is it that you can fail a professional sports drug test with an over-the-counter medicine?

jackieswanson said...

His boobs really ARE bigger than mine. And that just doesn't seem fair in the world of checks and balances. Or in any old world at all!
While we're talking Manny, his salary, and the size of his manboobs; mine are available for viewing at your local video store or cable pay-per-view. LETHAL WEAPON. Does Manny receive pay during his suspension.
My theory is that Manny had one too many Ice-Blendeds from The Coffee Bean and it really mucked up his test.
Go Manny!!!!

jackieswanson said...

Seriously, really hard to believe.
Manny, Manny.......

Tom Quigley said...

Jackie Swanson said: "His boobs really ARE bigger than mine. And that just doesn't seem fair in the world of checks and balances."

Yes, but Jackie -- no matter how many performance- or body-enhancing drugs he takes, he would never have been able to entertain us on CHEERS like you did...

Ref said...

Uh, if Manny is your child's hero, you need to intervene with your child. All major league players are mercenaries to a large extent, but Manny takes it to extremes. Except for his ability with a bat, he is not a man to admire. Is my Boston showing too much?

WV: Akies = What Manny gets when a tough pitcher is going for the other team!

Anonymous said...

What is your traiterous offspring's take on this? Is he gloating?

Matt said...

It's some kind of female drug? I guess that's Manny being womanny.

A. Buck Short said...

jackieswanson said…His boobs ARE bigger than mine….
Seriously, really hard to believe.
Manny, Manny….
Be still my heart! OK, now that we’ve got that out of the way, if this is Show & Tell, until I make it back to Blockbuster, so far it’s only Tell. Manny, Manny... Hey, I just got that. Let’s take a shot at the prompt.

--------------The Manny Song--------------
Manny my hero, you’re my Asti Spumante.
When we’re together, I’m like El Tiante.
Your slugging percentage could again lead the nation,
If it weren’t for this 50-game drug violation.

Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny,
Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny,
M-A-N-N-Y Why?

I really don’t care ‘bout what drugs they got in ‘yo
Just don’t let ‘em deport you to Santo Domingo
I know you were just trying to reach your peak
But your boobs are so booby, I hope they don’t leak

Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny,
Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny,
M-A-N-N-Y Why?
----Because you’re Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny, Manny ‘o mine.

But while you’re all still here tonight at the sports bar, who will join us in

---The Manny Rodriguez Jersey Song?

99 needles of juice in your ass
99 needles of juice
If there’s a drug test that you cannot pass
There’s 98 needles of juice still in Mass.

98 needles of juice you concealed
98 needles of juice
If one of those needles you happen to wield
It’s 50 games off, Rodney-Left-Dangerfield

97 needles of juice in your pants
97 needles of juice
If one of them can’t your performance enhance
It’s no harm, no foul, and no miscreance.

96 needles of juice…. etc.

Man o’ Manny! I got a million of ‘em. Sadly, none of them are any better than these. And if my word verification wasn't MATEET, may God strike me dead.

jbryant said...

Oh Jackie, that was one fantastic swan dive -- um, make that Swanson-dive I guess. :)

And she can act, too, folks!

Anonymous said...

Every team has trainers.

They are paid good money and they know what is banned. Manny didn't have to go to MLB, all he had to do was go to the Dodgers training staff.

He is a cheater.

He has probably been a cheater his whole career.

The fact that you like him does not prove he is a good guy, just that he is charismatic.

He should be banned for the whole season, without pay.

Anonymous said...

Surprised he isn't wacked out on some more hard core stuff, he did have to play for the Cleveland Indians after all. I think that's the only way he could have tolerated the place, just by being wazzed out on something.

Simon H. said...

Ken Griffey Jr. and (I hope) Albert Pujols are looking better and better each passing day. I wish they would just suspend them a year the first time, that might eliminate some of the stupidity we're seeing.

Cap'n Bob said...

All I know about him is his public persona, and that guy is a total jerk.

DF said...

So that leaves Griffey, Thome and Frank Thomas on an ever shrinking list of "1990s sluggers that haven't tested positive yet." Speaking of Frank, I just saw him playing today... For the Yankees... In Mr. Baseball... In place of Tom Selleck.

Oh On Demand.

Unknown said...

This "doctor" is a fiction and there was no "prescription" Manny was taking steroids and to mask it he takes the HCG.This is a serious violation and circumstantial evidence that he is a steroid user and probably has been for years. He continues to lie.


Cleveland, OH

Mary Stella said...

If Satan needed an agent, Scott Boras would offer representation.

No, Philadelphia Phillies fans will never forget that he convinced JD Drew to sit out a season rather than sign with our team when we drafted him.

Anonymous said...

You would think the Dodgers would have a rule that their players' other doctors must check with the team's doctors before prescribing anything. I am a kidney patient. All of my meds must be approved by my kidney doctor. Manny could have saved himself $8 million by making a simple phone call.

Anonymous said...

So that leaves Griffey, Thome and Frank Thomas on an ever shrinking list of "1990s sluggers that haven't tested positive yet."None of whom seem likely to test positive. In the case of Thomas, his source of pride wasn't that he could hit the ball 800 feet, or that he could hit 50-55 homers a season. It was that he had a batting eye like Ted Williams; that he could lay off a pitch that was one-sixteenth of an inch off of his hitting zone. Steroids won't help you with that.

DodgerGirl said...

I just wish MLB had taken a hard line on steroid use when it first came to the forefront.

Even though the boys lost last night, they still proved they could hit without Manny, so I still have hope for the season.

Also, has a kind word ever been written about Scott Boras? Not that I've ever seen.

ELS said...

ITEM: Yeah, Manny must have felt terrible about playing in Cleveland when the Indians were the best team in the A.L. and went to the World Series. We didn't win... but we didn't have to buy tickets to be there. Right, Yankees fans?

ITEM: So are the Dodgers going to do the classy thing and put some of that $7.7 million toward some public services? Big Brothers and Sisters can always use a boost, and I'm sure there are one or two anti-drug groups who could stand a little support in Manny's name...

I remain,
Eric L. Sofer
The Bad Clown...

flem snopes said...

Keith Olbermann identified the drug by name last night as a female hormone which kick starts the body's natural production of testosterone after a round of steroids.

It's meant to mask the steroids.

Much more serious than a nutritional supplement.

bettyd said...

I am in Mass resident, and I always loved Manny. Like Ken said, his overgrown child thing was charming to me, but Curt Shilling says the lack of seriousness was a pain to the pros in the clubhouse. Joking about an error that blows a save for someone irks pitchers, I guess. I defended it all until he slugged the sixty plus travel secretary. Most have been roid rage.

I am disappointed in this because of all the reporters and other players, even Schilling, that talked of the work ethic and a hitting machine. It is like he can't accept that his body will eventually not be able to do what it did. It is all ego and not accepting reality.

Do you notice that the roids are only making the great natural talents keep playing. They are not making mediocore players into A-Rod. It is really ego or fear of becoming human.

I read a Bill Simmons article on ESPN today and he quoted the Chess movie "he is better at playing chess than you will be at anything in your life". That is Manny and hitting.

nochipperjones said...

Slugged the sixty plus travel secretary?!!!

For the love of God, please tell me this isn't so??

Was hoping he'd donate some serious bucks to HomeBoys Bakery in Los Angeles. They REALLY need the help. Also, thought Manny should donate some serious manhours coaching young kids. Giving back. Humble thyself. One of my neighbors swears that come July, everybody will pretty much forget. The attention span of the Western world.
If he slugged the travel secretary, SORRY but perhaps he's a lost cause!

Barking Up Trees said...

i just wish this happened while rupert murdoch owned the dodgers... talk about schadenfreude city... as a 40-year sox fan, i was one of the few who didn't enjoy manny's antics regardless of the numbers he put up... HE DOES NOT RESPECT THE GAME and he can go to hell...

of course this won't affect manny at all, he'll just enjoy the 50-game vacation... but again, as boston fans, we do harbor a marvelous antipathy for l.a. and its fair-weather fans:


Eric Weinstein said...


I don't know if you were joking, but the traveling secretary incident last summer was one of the more ridiculous incidents that helped Manny shoot his way out of Boston. Jumping the 60+ year old traveling secretary because he couldn't score Manny a few extra tickets for an upcoming of the teammates leaked it to the media...Manny was real class act.

Out here in Boston, the best comments I've heard is that Manny let his dreadlocks grow to cover up his HGH/Steroid-enlarged pumpkin-head.

AZRedSoxGal said...

I'm taking HCG for a dr. recommended diet aid. Have lost 12 lbs. and am batting .356!