Sunday, August 23, 2009

Fall Movie Preview: Part One

Off to Denver with the Dodgers for a week long road trip that will also include Cincinnati. I hope it doesn't snow. In the meantime, here's my annual Fall Movie Preview, so you'll know what to rush out and see when it's finally available at Redbox.

JENNIFER’S BODY – Diablo Cody’s cannibal movie. A high school she-demon eats people. Edible Oedipal.

FAME – must be fleeting since they have to remake it every few years. Now the star wannabes pursue careers in rap and filmmaking. But I’m sure all the kids are still misunderstood, unsure of their sexuality, and deathly afraid of gym class.

TYLER PERRY’S I CAN DO BAD ALL BY MYSELF – It should be about the unconscionable way he treats writers.

EXTRACT – Written by Mike Judge so it’ll either be a hit or pulled after one showing. Jason Bateman as a frustrated boss in a company that makes something unimportant. Probably will never be adapted for television. What network would buy such a premise?

CAPITALISM: A LOVE STORY -- Michael Moore’s latest documentary. This time examining capitalism. How he does this without embarrassing Charlton Heston is anybody's guess.

MORE THAN A GAME – Documentary about LeBron James’ senior year of high school. Since it’s not done by Michael Moore the film is about basketball, not corruption in the educational system, corruption in organized sports, or corruption in the royalties owed Charlton Heston.

CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF MEATBALLS – Animated version of the children’s book. Written and directed by Phil Lord & Chris Miller who did CLONE HIGH so I might see it despite the title.

SURROGATES – A sci-fi world set in the near future where humans mingle with robots. So far I’ve described every sci-fi movie of the last ten years. The twist here is that there is a terrorist. And Bruce Willis. "Yippe-ki-yay, cyborgfucker!”

ALL ABOUT STEVE – Sandy Bullock’s latest Romcom, which she also produced. She stalks Bradley Cooper. Sounds like the title should be ALL ABOUT SANDY.

THE INFORMANT! – Matt Damon helps the FBI expose a price-fixing scheme. Directed by Steven Soderbergh. Hollywood will let him make a movie about accounting inconsistencies in agriculture but not one about baseball.

THE OTHER MAN – Laura Linney nude scenes, guys!

THE INVENTION OF LYING – Ricky Gervais as the only person on the planet who is capable of lying. All politicians, studio execs, and Roger Clemens must be dead then. Smart money says this is a smart comedy.

BRIGHT STAR – the story of 19th-century British poet, John Keats. Date movie for anyone over two hundred.

SHUTTER ISLAND – Martin Scorsese’s psychological thriller starring Leo DiCaprio (natch!) set in a high-security facility for the criminally insane. But with a title like SHUTTER ISLAND you know Fox is going to turn it into a reality show.

COUPLES RETREAT – Vince Vaughn/Jon Favreau comedy about couples trapped in a high-security facility for the criminally insane. Oh, wait. I always get this confused with SHUTTER ISLAND. This is four couples on a romantic tropical island. Another possible Fox reality show. Hey, it’s directed by Peter Billingsley – Ralphie from CHRISTMAS STORY! Be careful looking into that view finder -- you could poke an eye out.

Part Two tomorrow.

25 comments:

Scot B. said...

The Informant is based on a really good book. I didn't know they adapted it so when I saw the trailer I was shocked and very pleasantly surprised. It's a bizarre true story and it looks like Soderbergh and Damon captured it.

BC in OC said...

Paramount pushed Shutter Island back to February. Doesn't have the money for a decent marketing campaign.

Nat G said...

Written by Mike Judge so it’ll either be a hit or pulled after one showing."

Or, as in the case of Office Space, both. (I'm the only person I know who saw that in the theater on its original release. Even wrote a review for my company newsletter saying that almost no one was in the theater, but that word would get around. Just thought it would happen quicker than it did. Bless the video market.)

Tim W. said...

The Informant looks like it could be brilliantly funny. Matt Damon looks great in it.

And for those keeping track. Shutter Island, whenever it comes out, will be only the fourth pairing of Scorsese and Dicaprio, compared to the nine that Scorsese did with DeNiro.

alan0825 said...

What's behind the comment on Tyler Perry? Just curious. I'm not a big fan of his.

D. McEwan said...

"Tim W. said...
The Informant looks like it could be brilliantly funny. Matt Damon looks great in it."

No he doesn't. He looks FAT in it, because he IS fat in it. For the character, he shoveled on the pounds. I've seen shirtless shots of him taken while the film was in production, and he looks ghastly.

It's in character. I know, Yada, yada. Would you be excited to see Laura Linnay in her new film if she was waddling around looking fat? Meanwhile, fat actors need work.

The dopiest thing about the original FAME (which was made 29 years ago, so it's not like they do it every other year, or even decade. It's just that TV series made it seem like it was constantly being remade) was Paul McCrane as the lonely sad kid, outcast because he was the only gay kid IN THE HIGH SCHOOL FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS!!!

My gay friends and I sat in the theater howling with laughter. Honestly. They should have had a guy who was lonely because he was the only straight guy in the school, which I assume they'll have in the new version.

As for their being deathly afraid of gym class: it's the High School for the Performing Arts. They don't have gym class.

TYLER PERRY’S I CAN DO BAD ALL BY MYSELF is the most honest film title of all time.

Mike Judge's famous film OFFICE SPACE was about employees reacting against their greedy, slave-driving bosses. His new one, EXTRACT, is about poor, put-upon bosses dealing with lazy, resentful employees. It's like tattooing "I've Totally Sold Out!" on his forehead.

I saw the trailers for THE GOODS and THE INVENTION OF LYING one right after the other. THE GOODS looked like a horrible, ghastly movie. The trailer left me not only intent on avoiding the movie, but wanting to UNsee the trailer.

Whereas, THE INVENTION OF LYING looked so original and wonderful, I would have been pleased if they'd run it instead of the movie I was there to see. I can't wait. It's the first comedy I've looked forward to in years. (And how right was I about THE GOODS? What a bomb!)

blogward said...

LAPSE OF TASTE ALERT:

Liam Neeson's wife Natasha died in a skiing accident last March. So that joke's a clunker. Just saying.

Willy B. Good said...

The Other Man sounds a must see as I've heard Laura Linney's acting is sensational when she is nude.

Paul Duca said...

PIRATE RADIO, which was supposed to open this month, is now xcheduled for November

ScottR said...

"Eatable"? Why not "Edible"?

Jayne said...

The few trailers I saw for Fame actually look pretty good. It's one of the few "fall" movies I'm looking forward to seeing.

KEN LEVINE said...

Loyal readers of this blog know -- I can't spell worth shyt.

bettyd said...

blogward - that Liam Neeson comment jarred me too.

Another piece of kiddie lit being made into a movie is Maurice Sendak's Where the Wild Things Are. THe book is 48 pages with lovely artwork, but I can't see it coming into a movie of 90 minutes.

KEN LEVINE said...

I removed the Liam Neeson reference even though it wasn't a joke, just a description of the movie. But it's not worth keeping if people are bothered by it. Especially since it wasn't even intended to get a laugh.

Tim W. said...

D. McEwan, I didn't mean that Damon looked physically good, but that from what I saw from the trailer, he looks really funny in the film. That mustache he wears is further proof that most men look like dorks with a mustache, which makes you wonder why they grow them.

D. McEwan said...

"Tim W. said...
D. McEwan, I didn't mean that Damon looked physically good, but that from what I saw from the trailer, he looks really funny in the film. That mustache he wears is further proof that most men look like dorks with a mustache, which makes you wonder why they grow them."

Tell that to Zorro.

I understood what you meant. I was doing this thing I do, where I twist what other people have written or said for humorous effect. I call it "Joking."

PS. I have a mustache. I have had it on my face since June, 1968, having last shaved my upper lip before my high school graduation ceremony. Originally it was black, but now it is snow white. My beard has come and gone a few times over the years, but the mustache had been a constant.

I grew it because, after glueing one on for a role in a school play, I saw that I clearly looked better with it.

I thought Matt's mustache looked good. The 50 extra pounds were what look awful.

I'll give you this. My dad agreed with you. But then, he thought Jeanette MacDonald was a "Hot Chick," so I've always known not to trust his taste. (And mother tried for 40 years to convince him to grow a mustache. She thought men looked sexier with them.)

And there on my wall is a treasured photo of my long-dead grandfather, whom I lvoed very much, smiling behind his mustache, looking pretty damned dapper for 80.

But there are some men out there unable to grow more than wispy little things on their upper lips. I suppose they have to vent their bitterness somewhere.

Tim W. said...

D. McEwan,

You seemed to be somewhat offended about my crack about mustaches. I was writing for humourous effect, but if you want, you can include yourself in the minority when I said `most men'. Since I don't know what you look like, I'll assume you are in that minority. Although if you think Damon's mustache looked good, then perhaps not. I thought the whole point of the mustache in the movie was to make him look dorky.

-suitepotato- said...

That Gervais vehicle jumps the shark with the logline all by itself. Gervais' entire shtick is telling the truth amusingly. Not sure where that can go.

Extract has one thing going for it. In the commercials I've seen so far, they've chosen to keep Bateman silent and emoting facially instead. On the other hand, I'm wondering how bad his dialogue has to be that they thought it better that his part be rendered as a silent one in the commercials.

D. McEwan said...

"Tim W. said...
D. McEwan,

You seemed to be somewhat offended about my crack about mustaches."

How could I be offended by being told I've looked like a dork for 41 years?

"-suitepotato- said...
That Gervais vehicle jumps the shark with the logline all by itself. Gervais' entire shtick is telling the truth amusingly. Not sure where that can go."

Have you even seen the trailer? You're prejudging it by the "logline"? The trailer showed just exactly where it could go, while making me laugh with every line.

The last time I judged a movie based only on the premise was HOOK, when I thought "Peter Pan grows up? Well that trashes the whole basic premise of the story."

Oh wait, HOOK was one of the worst movies ever made. Well, maybe a movie CAN be judged on the premise.

For imstance, if the premise is: "It stars Keanu Reeves" it's probably going to be awful. (I'm told the first MATRIX movie was good. I haven't seen it, since it starred Keanu. He was okay in DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL, since he played an alien; much better casting for him than playing a human. But the movie still sucked.)

Tim W. said...

D.McEwan: "How could I be offended by being told I've looked like a dork for 41 years?"

So I'm guessing you weren't including yourself in the minority I mentioned who don't look like dorks. Your call.

D. McEwan said...

"Tim W. said...
So I'm guessing you weren't including yourself in the minority I mentioned who don't look like dorks. Your call."

My call is just the reverse. The men whom mustaches make look like dorks are the minority, mostly you guys who can't grow a decent one. Hairylip Envy.

Tim W. said...

D. McEwan,

I actually have a full beard. Thanks for playing, though.

D. McEwan said...

So if I crop out just your chin, you look like a dork?

Or do you have a beard but no mustache, which makes anyone look like an Amish dork? (ALL Amish men look like dorks. Let them post a refutation to THAT!)

Tim W. said...

If you crop out my chin, I'll look like I'm missing half my head, so that would just be weird looking.

And no, I'm not doing the Amish thing. Not that it wasn't a huge craze after Witness came out. I still remember some of the younger kids in high school gluing tea leaves on their chin and calling themselves names like Jebodiah, Samuel and Ezekial. This were crazy times.

Anonymous said...

I worked on Cloudy for over a year at Sony Imageworks and yes Phil and Chris were the directors but i'm sad to say that the real writers/directors are sitting down the street on the Sony Lot - all their witty humor got over produced. It will be funny and good but no edge like it should have

Sorry that this is Anonymous but Imageworks is a really small place