I think there were one or two product placement ads in the show this week. But they were handled so subtly and deftly it was hard to even notice.
Yeah yeah yeah!
It was Beatles night again. The producers paid for that songbook and by God they were going to use it! Last week it worked great. This week it was the Camp Chippewa talent show for parents weekend. The judges were right that the song selections were bad. If only the contestants had come to me first.
Amanda Overmyre sang “Back in the U.S.S.R.” She should have sung “I Want to be Your Man”. Every Amanda performance is the same. But don’t take my word for it. Go to iTunes and download her songs today!
Kristy Lee Cook – So many better songs she could have chosen besides “You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away”. For example: “I’m a Loser”, “Don’t Bother Me”, “The End”, and of course, “You say Hello and I say Goodbye”. Terrible again. Wants to be Carrie Underwood. Instead she’s Carrie Stiffaswood. You can read all about Carrie Underwood and all other American Idols by going to my blog -- Kenlevine.blogspot.com – and writing “American Idol” in the search box. Or you can text the words “Ken Levine Carrie Blog Idol pitchy.”
American Osmond, David Archuleta rebounded nicely after last Tuesday’s misstep. This week he sounded as good as the fidelity you’ll get in your new AT&T Nokia phone. His “Long and Winding Road” was the best performance of the night. I like David but there’s something unsettling about him. It’s always the nice, sweet, perfect boys who get caught wearing their mothers’ clothes.
Michael John tried to condense “Day in the Life” into 90 seconds thus making it “Couple Hours in the Life”. It’s the first time I’ve ever heard a medley of one song. Total disaster. Michael must feel pretty low right now. But you know what would perk him right up? An ice cold Coca Cola! Unlike his horrible rendition of a Beatles classic, Coke is the real thing!
Brooke White – This week we discovered her Achilles Heel and it turns out it IS her Achilles Heel. Brooke can sing but she can’t move. Fine when she’s at the piano, a Clydesdale when she has to dance. She sang “Here Comes the Sun” and was not great. But to her credit, she acknowledged that. I love her honesty. Every week she somehow wins me over – the way Ford will win you over when you take a test drive of the new Mustang! Or, go to Kenlevine.blogspot.com and just order one!
Simon was right about David Cook. He’s not as good as he thinks he is. Paula jabbered on for five minutes about the ear monitors some of the contestants wear to better hear themselves sing. David Cook must wear his 24/7. He did “Daytripper” but not the Beatles arrangement. He chose the better-known and far superior Whitesnake version. But you can download both on itunes and judge for yourself! And you can then vote by going to Kenlevine.blogspot.com.
I finally figured out who Carly Smithson reminds me of – Divine in a dark wig. This week she unveiled her new “7” tattoo on her knuckle – in honor of the number of colors now available for the new ipod mini! She did a nice job with “Blackbird” although Simon took issue with the song selection and I must agree. A better ballad would have been “I Am the Walrus”. Has there ever been a better, more heart tugging lyric for a torch singer than, “Yellow matter custard/dripping from a dead dog’s eye”?
Carly’s “7” tattoo could also be referring to the IQ of Jason Castro. He butchered “Michelle” and didn’t know that “ma belle” was French. He thought it was “Michelle, my bell” and what woman wouldn’t melt being compared to a fire alarm? Speaking a “ma bell”, AT&T has the fewest dropped calls! Go to Kenlevine.blogspot.com and find out more!
Syesha Mercado whined through “Yesterday” as she whines through every song. But at least she dropped the Don King hair.
Chikezie is trying to stand out. There’s no question about that. But unlike the new Ford Mustang that stands out because it’s classic design mixed with modern technology, Chikezie’s version of “I’ve Just Seen Her Face” was a blend of Baby Face and Country Bear Jamboree. Last week he had a fiddle, this week a harmonica. I can’t wait until next week when he trots out the Latin zither for “Beatles-songs-covered-by-other-artists” week.
And finally, Ramiele Malubay who took ass kissing and boot licking to a new level by emulating Paula Abul. What was with that stupid hat? She sang “I Should Have Known Better”, which she should have. A Beatles song more in line with her personality would be “I’ll Cry Instead”.
All in all this was a lackluster week -- worthy of the Freddy & the Dreamers songbook. So who do I think will go home this week? I’ll let you know… after the break.